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Cordelius Dec 2014
sitting in the shower
hoping that I scrub off all my ***** sins
praying that I can wash it all away
the water running down my face
wishing that I could start over
closing my eyes and imagining another life but,
I am far too young to die
when one door closes another opens
the cliches that keep us going in life
are the ones I am dependent on
His plan is often unclear but I trust in Him
to lead me down the path that is meant for me
hoping that I can make sense of it all
praying that it won't hurt for long
turn the water off
dry myself off
put on clean warm clothes
and continue on
hoping and

keep on keeping on
- Joe Dirt
  Dec 2014 Cordelius
Drifting Down
Cruel whispers, gentle whimpers,
glares from across the way.
Judgments floating, lungs choking,
left lifeless for all to bear.
No one cares, secret affairs,
blank for none to see;
but the truth comes out,
when all it’s about, is lust and apathy.
the deadly sins
  Dec 2014 Cordelius
Drifting Down
What's the point in wasting our time sulking in the bloodstained past that will never be forgotten
Or the blood baths of mystery soaking into any bit of happiness that we hope will soon come
None of us are truly happy in our shameful skins that are so ferociously clawed at,
But to feel the need to survive
To stay alive to bear through the pain
To experience those once in a lifetime memories
If that's all there is to count on
The evil over shines any bit of earth's wonders,
But what's so wonderful when all you think about is the next disaster that will soon destroy you
Into the billions of pieces you so carefully put back together,
No need to witness life's miserable beauties
Or death's unawakening faults,
When all that's on your mind is the darkness that will soon overpower you in a matter of moments
You waste your time wondering if this is what you want,
When you spend every waking moment for this dreadful hour,
Why wait any longer when death will forever be on your shoulders?
As days pass by,
No one will remember,
They'll be just like you
Envying the fact that the darkness that you're indulging  yourself into now,
Will soon become impeccable brightness that will never leave your side.
Spent my entire life contemplating whether or not to follow through with suicide and end the suffering of everyday or continue to drag out the misery life brings. In the end, evil wins, takes control, guides my path. Purgatory.
Cordelius Dec 2014
if you're reading this,
i love you.
if you ever feel like you're all alone
talk to me
if you feel like you're not loved,
guess what
I love you.
learning to love myself

talk to me please
Cordelius Dec 2014
I need a fresh start
disconnect my heart from the paths already known
disassemble my life, stab a map with a knife
go wherever it shows, only myself and a bag of clothes
without a second thought im already on my yacht
crossing the big blue sea
set me free
set me free
set me free

  Dec 2014 Cordelius
Andrew Saromines
My problems began the moment her blood touched my hands
Over such minuscule strife I took her life
While too late I learned my love for her ran deeper than my knife
Oh, if only it were one time!
One wound they could wind together
Pressing the gaps of her flesh into one
Not nine, oh not nine times!
And if a crime as awful as mine deserves death I wouldn't mind.
Because I took from a life the components needed to survive
I watched the look in her eyes fade into a dull dark sky
I watched the life of my world become desolate and dry
Crumbling mountains and molten rock flowing like fountains
Draining seas and stifling the breeze
A breath escaped her lips
And in a moment of frenzy to capture her memory
Upon those lips I laid a kiss
Still warm from the afterthought of life
If only I could give her mine!
I screamed and wished to reverse the flow of time
To un-puncture her chest and stomach and thighs
Oh, the red grows
Nine rivers flow
Painting her hearts mural onto the floor
I will not believe I have lost her!
Her heart slows but her soul beats strong
The march of death descends, no! This is all wrong!
I am not meant to lose her
I've waited so long.
Nine years...
For nine years I loved her from afar
Watching her live a life I wanted to be to be a part of
I won't lose her now, she won't leave my arms tonight
I'll take her to my house and sew her up tight.
With her wounds held together I'll fill up her veins
I'll drain my blood, this will not be in vain!
I'll replace what I stole
I'm sorry! So sorry!
My vision is blurry.
I see more than one of her I worry
I see nine
Nine of her, dead
Now only one thing is left
Her heart won't work so I give her this instead
I press the tool of death to my chest
I must be careful, I must.
The blade is pushed inside I must be quick before I die
I must replace her heart with mine
While it still still beats to give her life
I will save her
My vision recedes..
I will save her
My breathing is ceased..
I will save her
I'm brought to my knees..
I will save her
My love it lives on..
I will save her
If only my body were so strong..
I will save her
I'm feeling death begin to dawn..
I will save her
I know I can't join my love..
I will save her
I'm meant for below, I sent her above..
I will save her
I mean it, I truly believe it
You'll all see!
But who will save me?
  Dec 2014 Cordelius
do not feel the need to change your works/pieces because people on this site don't think you're up to par. I encourage all of you to keep writing
in whatever forms the words come to you. This is not high school or college. You are not being graded. Criticisms are welcome and considered but don't have to apply to your work if they don't fit in with how you think your poetry should be written.
I've never openly responded to things happening outside my profile and in the community. I was a bit peeved to find that there are people on this site who feel the need to police "bad" poetry and think that we need to be pushed to a preconceived betterment.  Keep writing, keep writing. Some of you don't have any better outlets and I want this place to stay a safe haven for all of us. I am in no way bad mouthing the people who do give criticisms and help people who genuinely want help with their writing, keep doing you. But please be considerate.
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