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Poetess1012 May 2014
For long we have traversed this path,

Hands held tight,

We moved on ahead.

You speak to me,

Nay not a foreign tongue,

Yet what you speak I cannot comprehend!

I reach, I seek

For Someone,

Yet it is not you I seek.

We clutch desperately

And move ahead.

Alas, ‘t is in opposite directions that we proceed.

In this frantic tug of war if conflicting needs

I wonder,

When hands meant to anchor turned to shackles!

For a moment I am alone;

There should be an obligation,

Or maybe a commitment demanded of us…
Yet no such thing exists!

You live, I live

And that’s just how it is !

I am appalled for an instant

At this friendship turned travesty.

Rather  it is a strange transaction this,

A transformation

From strangers, acquaintances, to friends …to strangers once more.

Yet hands held tight

We face each other,

And I wonder, who will be first to break free?

:
:

**Will we ?!
Poetess1012 May 2014
I am standing at the edge of Never,

Looking beyond, looking across ,

the endless expanse of the

Immortal Sea.

I take a step forward…

Testing ,hoping, wishing, praying

I look down

To see the black waters churning,

Grinding, Crushing, Eternal waves.

I look up only to be blinded by heavens face.

I try to jump I bend my knees

But fall down in defeat instead.

I ventured out to take a leap of faith,

But was pushed down by my own device instead.

I get up, dust off the rubble,

And venture out a little further again…

I am standing at the edge of Never

And with every two steps forward

I’m pushed down by three instead!

The face of heaven scorches on;

And in the horizon of that

All Encompassing Sea,

I see a lone bird fly.

So free, so powerful, so magnificent that beast,

…All too soon it passes from view….

I look ahead

And standing on that Edge of Never

I say,

Destiny be ******

I write My story

I am Emperor, I am Slave

I am Ruler, Master and Subordinate

I am the Dominant and the Submissive

I am pleasure and I am Pain

Who is Faith?! Who is Kismet?

I run my show, I decide the Game.

All I want, All I seek is Within ME

I am standing at the edge of Never

And I take this leap of faith

And as I pummel into those Eternal depths

I know, the oceans but a pond

and the storms just a breeze.

I know all ‘s in my power

and well within my reach.

I drift on those waters

forever free

My strengths, weaknesses, flaws and virtues

Are not washed by those treacherous waves.

Oh my friends! the water just cleanses;

purges my soul,

Glorifies my victory and showcases my loss.

I stood at the Edge of Never

And now I float in the Sea of Life

I’ll get out and go back  to the cliff again,

Take that leap once-more…!
Poetess1012 May 2014
Will you remember me,
Long after this day has passed...
Will you remember these words,
These thoughts that I put down now-
A stranger, acquaintance-
Whoever you may be ?

Will you recall me
When your day ends;
To you I am, but
A nameless faceless entity .
I am a thief, a murderer,a convict
Awaiting trial.

For, as you read, I steal !
Your time, your space, your mind!
I hold you captive with these words
No matter how weak my bonds may be...
And YOU are no different my friend,
For, you too steal this time I spend
And take a peak into my deepest sins -
As you invade my privacy that
I risk to share with you,

It's a consensual theft this -
A strange agreement
As is indeed the life that surrounds us,
Meaningless transactions
That bind and shackle.

Will you remember that girl next door
Who failed to get that Howard degree
Or that old man who always sits on that bench
Perhaps pondering about life ,
and the myriad mysteries it holds.
Or maybe that woman who walked past,
With the cheap perfume and simple shoes...
Or perhaps  that little boy down the street ?!

Will any stranger remember YOU?
Without an invention or achievement to your name ?
Without a hefty bank account
Or that ideal philanthropic heart ?

We are all just chemicals,
An experiment gone wrong
And I Know a mundane encounter won't
Make it into the book of your life.
With tomorrow's dawn
These words will fade,
Erase from your memory.
And I know you will forget
To Remember Me ...
Poetess1012 May 2014
There was once a swing hanging from an old tree,
By the house on fifth street.
And as a little girl everyday I would go to play
On that swing and fly high
Oh so high! Up in the sky !

Until one day the swing broke;
There had been a storm the day before .


A few years later I found a rock
High up on the hill top.
I would stand on it and stare
At the big vast city below;
Marvelling, wondering ...Amazed!!

Until one day we left the town
And the hill top far far behind.


I had a fish once, it wasn't mine per say;
It lived in a pond , just outside school
And I would go to it everyday.
It gave me such joy to have this friend,
It was missing a fin, just so you know.

Until one day I saw a cat by the pond;
The fish was no more .

Many years later I fell in love,married and had a child.
He was a wonderful man, my husband-
Kind generous compassionate
And I love him so !

But one day he came home with a doctor's report
A year hence, he was no more.

I married several years later
But that love I could never again find.
And now at eighty I lie on this bed
Counting till it's time.

And every time I think of that swing I curse the storm;
I think of the hill, wishing I could have stayed;
I hate the cat that ate my fish;
But more than that, I hate the disease that stole my love.


Then I realise, I should instead revel
In the euphoria from the swing and hill;
And think instead of my fish and not the cat.
Cherish those memories with my husband
And not dwell on that last year of his life!

But some how, the glass was never half full for me
.
.
And all I have in the end is Regret
Poetess1012 May 2014
Finger nails clawing at my ****** skin,
A pool of blood
A discarded blade
And just one phrase across my chest

*MEA MAXIMA CULPA

— The End —