I sit and watch the water and the wind communicate,
I watch the birds fly over as they watch over our fate,
I wonder where the water goes, and where it all started,
The breeze carries to my nose, smells the ocean has departed.
Up here I hear the noises, nobody else can hear,
Down there they see our toes until they suddenly disappear.
It's a wonder where we go, where we all wander off to,
Like the thunder and the snow, I often wonder where they ever got to.

Such a simple thing to say that it all doesn't matter,
But don't you ever listen to the nature and its chatter?
Some times it whispers softly to your ears, or to your skin,
But when you start to listen more you can't deny what's found within.

A palm tree by the beach can rustle so aggressive,
You find one in a street so silent, so **** impressive!
Would you give it some attention if it couldn't catch your eye?
A wave that started out as just a rain drop from the sky.

Various pieces of bark have fallen from a tree,
Something in my heart, I can't see, is touching me,
The indifference between a laugh and a cry,
The distance between a love and a lie.
Nature's crack and rumble of thunder
Sparks in me, another wonder.

Have you ever had something taken away from you?
Stolen from under your nose,
And you wondered what to do,
We all know how the story goes..

Was it was irreplaceable?
An experience to say the least,
Something so disgraceful,
As though your body was a feast.

Do you know what it feels like?
To carry such a secret?
Ashamed you didn't fight,
Ashamed you didn't keep it.

Have you ever wondered if you're wrong,
Set out to try and find it,
The place where you belong,
A place that you can hide in

Does your body resonate,
With a numbness and a pain?
A place reserved for hate,
And crying in the rain.

Or how about the moment
When you ripped away the carpet
Never mind atonement
Because everyone said "fark it"

When the next one had a go
And you didn't do a thing
Laid there waiting for the blow
You just copped it on the chin.

It's not your fault.
It's not your fault.
Lick your wounds
Lay off the salt.

Let go of shame
Forgive yourself
It's not a game
It's about your health.

You've had to learn
To respect your body
Scars that burn
Don't make you a hotty

Exploitation is not a regret
No one told you how to be
Finding your way, don't forget
Don't let that **** cloud what you see

With such a love for all existence
None of them snuffed out your spark
Your light is shining with persistence
You made best friends with the dark.

What was it that made me think?
Who turned me in that direction?
Stand around and watch me sink,
Different versions of affection.

Did they ever see me blink?
Living a life of pure deception,
Hope not to drown, and so I drink,
As long as I look like perfection.

Something about me fits your kink,
No self-control, just a slave to your *******,
How did this begin? Was it the wink?
You're nothing but a **** infection.

Don't mind my mind, it's on the brink,
Deny my every last objection,
The shame I have hides in pink,
Your shame is triggered by rejection.

Live your life within your lies,
Go on and raise a f*g kid,
But when you look into my eyes,
We both know what you did.

To be mad at you is a waste of energy,
Forgiveness is just about the same,
Not mad at you, or anything,
And now I can't even remember ya name!
With love and light my remedy,
I hope you lose at your own game,
Because though you are no enemy,
You'll never understand the pain.

You'll never know the after math,
The years and tears that come,
You'll never know my wrath,
Because for you, it's all said and done.

I hope your parents question you,
I hope they look at you with disgust,
Whatever story that you spew..
But hey, one day we'll all be dust.

If I could feed your hunger
Or take away your pain,
Wake you from your slumber,
Or wipe away your shame.

If I could paint a smile
Permanent on your face,
Arrange the perfect style
So you fit in every space.

If I could work the world for you
So everyone you meet
Will love, and always be true
You'd never feel defeat.

If I had the chance to do it all
I wouldn't do one thing.
Instead, I will watch you fall,
And cry, and burn, and sting.

See even though you tell me
You can't bare it anymore
That you may as well be..
Living on the floor.

You say you cannot breathe
You say you cannot think
With nothing to believe
You let your worry sink.

The road that you are on
Is harder than you know
It's more than right and wrong
It's not easy to grow.

I choose not to fight your battles
Or give you any cheat codes,
I can not tune your channels
Or recharge, or reload..

I know what you don't know
And see what you cannot
That just because you're low
Doesn't mean that's all ya got!

You don't need a saviour
Steeling lessons from your shelf
You'd always feel like a failure
Knowing one version of yourself.

The challenges you're facing
Moments black, white and gray
All the goals you're chasing
It's part of finding your way

I'll be there when you cry
No matter where or when
But when time comes to lie
The beds we make await, my friend.

I took my empty cup of tea to the sink,
The sun caught my eye, made me squint.
Chucked my tea bag in the bin,
Then to an advertisement my ears tuned in..

"Come on down to your local flower store
We've got plants and flowers and gifts galore!
Celebrations for both life and death,
Come on down, we've got the best!"

With nothing much to do this day,
Looking at flowers that faded away,
I grabbed my keys and thought, what the heck 🤷‍♀️
Flowers is what I'm off to get..

Bells that chime when you open the door
Bits of petals and leaves scattered on the floor
Wonderful smells all through the room
Some are ready, some waiting to bloom

Behind a desk absolutely piled
Out she popped, and there she smiled.
The sweetest voice you'll ever hear
Asked me if I wanted to go for a beer..

Stormed out from the back,
Draped in a coat of black,
Flustered and stressed,
Heart pounding in her chest.
Switched the sign to 'back in 5'
And said "I NEED TO FEEL ALIVE!!"
Rolled her eyes around her head,
Threw her arms up at me and said
"WELL? Ya coming or not?"
For a moment, I was in shock.
A confused shrug and a little smirk,
Who knew flowers were such stressful work..

Into the pub and off the street
Half a beer down, staring at her feet.
Finally lifts her head where eyes meet mine,
She said "I'm sure out of yours, it all seems fine".

"These flowers that I sell in my shop,
You take them home, and watch them rott,
They bring some meaning for a day or two,
Then what's left? Then what do you do?
You could buy something and watch it grow,
But everything alive one day dies, ya know?
All that I am able to do for you,
Is only ever going to last a day or two"

Her eyes then wandered out the window
To watch the leaves and wind blow
I could see her search for peace out there
Each blink a moment of dark dispair.

"You'd think the girl who sells you flowers
Could make you feel cheery for hours,
But every flower has her day,
And this sunny flower's day is today"

At the pub the beers were on me,
And after that, my flowers were free.

Each day after, I thought about her,
Such a rare experience to occur,
I missed her even, just a little,
While waiting for my flowers to dwiddle.
Something like 2 weeks went by,
I was so excited to go and say hi!
I didn't mind the pouring rain,
Another day would of sent me insane!

Bells that chime when you open the door
Bits of petals and leaves scattered on the floor
Wonderful smells all through the room
Some are ready, some waiting to bloom

Behind a desk all clean and cleared
Out he popped, sad eyes appeared,
A beaten voice, full of pain,
Said flowers? Or just getting out of the rain?

I asked him about my mystery girl
Where oh where? Where in the world?
I could have sworn I had the right shift,
It is her spirits that I've come to lift.

The man had never heard of her,
My memories, were but a blurr,
He said he couldn't help me find,
The girl, the sad girl, that I left behind..
He continued prepping for a funeral
For a lady they called "Miss Illuminal".

Death.. You mean what is it like to go to sleep and never wake up?
Life.. You mean waking up after never having gone to sleep...

When I look back on my years
My reflection is meticulous.
They say to conquer my fears
But I think that's rediculous.

What scares me in this world
So few to little things,
All that has unfurled
Each memory that sings.

As I lay in bed
My fear is not to blame
Running through my head
The memories that bring shame.

Conquer your criticism
Forgive who you used to be
Ease up on the cynicism
That's how you set yourself free.

What is the most important thing to you?
Freedom? Love? Autonomy?

What do you want?
To be free?
What does it mean to be free?
What will it take to set yourself free?
How can you achieve true freedom?

To me..
Freedom is forgiveness.
Freedom is love.
Freedom is autonomy.
Above all, freedom is acceptance..

Accept your reality for what it is
And make choices
Accept your past and move forward
But learn from it
Accept yourself
Fall in love with you
Accept that you'll never have control
And flow with it

Acceptance, what is that?
To me..
Acceptance means to understand
To see
To know
To believe..

What stops you? Fear? Ignorance? Denial?
It is scary to further your awareness and come to terms with your truth.

How can we develop within such boundaries?
Courage, bravery.. Above all it's desire.

Desire. Do you really want this or do you just know you want this?
Wanting something and knowing something are two different things..

What drives you? Is it others? Yourself? Success? Status? Authority? Money?
No really! Please!
Be honest.. Actually ask yourself.. What honestly fuels you?
9 times out of 10 you will find the fuel to be empty. A false sense of motivation that runs out quickly and leads you to a dead end.

What you want vs. the method you're applying do not add up. There is a wholesome path waiting for you and it starts with reflection, awareness and support. You have the ability to become a better and more pure version of yourself... Are you gonna take it?