I fell out of this chair because
I just wanted to believe in all

you've said to me

all you've read to me

and even the pain you've

caused me.

I can no longer believe in
you because I can't get back

into this chair

because you lied

to me

but not only to me

you lied

by taking the

life of

my child.

I sit down on the floor

because you think

that it's cute.

how many acid raindrops have fallen
from the open skies up above.
how many people live today without
knowing the meaning of true love.

how many tears are formed in the eyes
of a man each and every day.
how many people try to use their voice
but never having a good word to say.

how many years have gone by since the
beginning of the good times.
how many neighborhoods can count the
days when there was no crime.

how many clean rushing streams are there
that actually find their way.
how many children walk the streets without
having a pillow for their head to lay.

how many times will man **** another man
just for the sake of his own greed.
how many years will continue to go by before
we destroy the only world we need.

my mind is somewhere but
my heart can't find it.
thoughts are ruling my head
but i'm being mislead.

i don't like who i am and it's
a pretty **** shame.
i can't seem to find or choose
which me i want to be.

my thoughts aren't clean and
i'm madder than hell.
to be wise is something that
i've loss long ago.

mentally the brain it's a cold
round empty ball.
an open field filled with empty
thoughts which are unpleasing.

defeated is what it is and it's has
a surreal way of taking over me.
there's no love there's no joy and
within i have no peace.

the ghost of past civil unrest
seem to linger everywhere.
the just always pay the price
for others who just don't care.

riots are formed by the mouth
by those who seek fame.
yet there's a death that is the
past of an forgotten name.

tragedies comes about and it
crosses every color line.
yet the scars of yesterday are
never far behind.

tensions flare and words are
spoken to ignite the flames.
to the political and the leaders
it just another game.

nobody has an answer for all
the pain and the sorrow.
yet the books are already open
just waiting for tomorrow.

the hinges are tight and the
door won't open.
the windows are all broken,
open to unwanted drafts.

years of paint has peeled and
has long faded away.
morning dew creeps in before
rays of sun evaporates it.

the walls are hollow and are
about to decay.
the once strong foundation
has slowly chipped away.

nobody comes by anymore
to chat of worldly things.
the identification has been
altered and lost forever.

Trouble always seem to poison my day.
If there's a way out I can't find my way.
Trust they say and never have doubts.
Is this truly what life is all about?

The sun up there in these big blue skies.
Doesn't shine on me to dry my tearful eyes.
Birds fly over my head never making a sound.
I never miss the puddles on this old wet ground.

Why don't I get to miss the things of wrong?
When people sing why don't I hear their song?
Candles burn at night without leaving me light.
The moon disappears in the middle of the night.

The mental aspect of it all it seems to get worst.
Rivers running all around me I still have a thirst.
Wanting to leave it all behind I can't find my way.
God teach me and lead me to paths for a better day.

everything has turned upside down
i can't find rest and i can't find peace.
the old world that i grew up knowing
has left me behind and no longer cease.

i'm  frustrated, i'm mortified, i'm penniless
i don't have the *** to carry my weight.
the numbness is so great within my soul
i cry because i have nothing to bare but mistakes.

i'm not myself anymore for so many days, nights
and for so many months and seasons.
i can't feel the hands of God reaching out to guide
me and i can't help but wonder is there a reason.

my faith has all but faded quietly and wistful away
the guidelines of all the rules no longer exist for me.
i want them in front of me, i need their guidance
to lead me back to be the one God intended me to be.

i don't know who i am or who i was suppose to be.
i know that I'm trapped inside this cage of rage.
surrounded by lions and many other ravaging beast.
they sit, they watch just waiting for me to take the stage.

i have nothing to offer but the pain that lies within me
yet it's doing it's best to not allow me to express my needs
i'm broken, sad and the rest of my life has come to an halt
i have lost my will to be able to stand up to  make a plea to succeed.