I am ashamed
At how broken i am.
I apologize
For the amount of stress
I may cause in the midst of your
Efforts of trying to keep me held together.
I apologize
that i continue to fall apart
Before your glue has time to dry.
I apologize
That every time you pick a piece of me up,
Yet another breaks.
I am trying.
You are fixing me slower than i am breaking,
And i am ashamed.
Thank you.
Thank you for not giving up
On a broken piece of nothing.

I'm looking for my husband.  He has
disappeared into some place inside
his mind, like a sea creature slides
into a coral bed.

Quick now, here he is for a moment
or an hour.  Like a Robin bobs in
the yard, he is beautiful in his song
before he vanishes into the sky,
flying above or around me.

Are his pieces forever gone? Will
I find a kiss behind my chair meant
for me alone? Will my sorrow erase
the years of love?

I will be brave today.  Tomorrow
I will be the coral he needs. A small
animal in a very large and
strange ocean. .

Caroline Shank

like water
I poured myself into her until she was overflowing at the brim

like reinforced steel
I bridged my heart to hers and welded myself to her soul

like the sun
I filled myself with light to cover her darkness

like a blanket
I shielded her from the harsh world underneath the covers

like magnets
I orbited her aura until we inevitably collided

like a seed
I felt myself growing up from her

Then, like an idiot
I could tell she felt nothing.

You wear this crown of miseries
  not on your head
  but deep inside your memories

soon,  

  it will find you again
  in a bleak coronation
  to welcome your reign.

there was a time
when i struggled to feel
and now it consumes me

Matches constantly lit
No char
No ash

Unscathed

No fire
No ember
Just memories it gave

They say that I’m
Too much to
Handle

Yet they never seem
To handle me with
Care

They say that I’m
Unable to
Trust

Yet they break it the
Moment I’m not
There

They say that I’m
Far too
Insecure

Yet they won’t
Help me
Heal

They say I’m
Cold and
Uncaring

Yet they ignore
What I
Feel

They say that I‘m
unable to
Listen

Yet they are the
Ones who can’t
Hear

They say I’m
Afraid of
Love

Yet there is
so much to
Fear...

I LIKE TO SAY YOUR NAME

I like to say
your name

when you're
not here

turn you
into sound

conjure you out of
thin air

so that you appear
before me

dressed in sound
only

memory sketching in
the rest of you

as if sound
was just an outline

and love
colours you in

adding the voice last
so I can hear you say.

"Hello you..!"
and there you are

as present
as present

can be.

I like to say
your name

when you're
not there.