I can give you my heart , make it your home.

Its a little bit broken , a bit empty.

But maybe you'll stay ?

Do you mind if its a bit small ?

It never really had room for two.

Its rough round' the edges , do you think it will do ?

Do you think its enough ?

Maybe I can find a home in your heart too.

Where do you find love ?

Do you find love in the unlikeliest of places or where it obviously seems to be ? Is love given like a gift , maybe a curse to bear ?

Is love in between pages of books and lines of notes to form a song or in stanzas of poems ?

And how do we find it ? Do we pray or wish on every star you see at night , maybe you come by it as you walk sidewalks and streets

Or perhaps if you look for it in faraway places amongst the mountains and the trees ? Maybe you'll find it.

Love is an enigmatic thing , it slips away just as it is within you reach , so I guess love is getting lucky , a stroke of luck bringing with it a handful of happiness.

Why do the waves crash onto the shore only to pull away and go back to the sea ?

As long as the melody of my voice plays in you , dance to it ,feel it, before it fades away.


Before I do.

Black was his eyes.the kisses and his lies. Black was the night and the all that it has to unfold.The whispers and secrets that I told.the color of the sky against the wisps of smoke and vapor. Endless darkness and liquor.Black was his embrace and every part of me he kept. The color behind my eyes when he'd hold me as we slept.The color I became when his love took over every part of my body. And the danger underneath his beauty that I couldn't see.The color of his heart , mine and everything in between.all the flashbacks and memories I wish I never had seen.The color of his shadow that seems to follow me around. The feeling of comfort in him that I found.The sky when it rained and the stars came out to play. The color of my life after he went away. The way I feel and my days, everything was black after the last time I saw his face. His goodbye and our last kiss. Everything I couldn't hold on to , Everything I would sorely miss.The color was black after we were done and through.Everything was black after you.

{black j.p.v}

Not all break ups are messy. They don't necessarily equate to slamming doors and screams  echoing off the walls and not all of them mean permanent goodbyes uttered with anger and disdain.

Some break ups are clean. Neatly folded and put away silently. A mutual understanding that that was the end. And sometimes no screams are heard , only deafening silence filling the room with thoughts of things longing to be said.

Quiet and solemn , memories are packed into bags and carried sadly out the door. Leaving its traces along with the sound of footsteps retreating

Then a stillness , a hollow stillness that tells you it is real and the hurt you feel within is a painful reminder that it is done. Wether it was messy or clean , mutual or one-sided . You cannot escape the harsh truth that whatever you had is  an object of the past , now meant for flashbacks at 3 am and words written on letters never meant to be sent.

Gamble your love , take the risk
Are you prepared to give it all ?
Maybe half ? Or maybe more ?
In a spinning haze
Where night seems to stand still
You win sometimes , you lose
You lose , your heart it breaks
You win : more,more,more
And at the end of the night
When no one is in sight
You count you count you count
You've lost it all , its gone
Its all been taken away

ice cold
white hot
wrecking my train of thought

I say these words as I think
I'm on the brink
of realizing what I feel

I despise , I love
I'm spun around
by your ever changing tides

Your eyes they say be mine
your hands they feel divine
but understanding you


Is harder than moving mountains
so I pray that someday
the clouds won't be gray

Huwag mo sanang maisipang balikan ang nangyari sa nakaraan.

Wag mo na sanang lakarin muli ang daang iyo nang tinalikuran.

Delikado ito.
Bako-bako.
Mabato.

Muli lang mawawasak ang puso mo.

Huwag mo nang alalahanin pa
Ang kulay ng kanyang mata

Kung ano ang pakiramdam
ng mga halik na iyo paring inaasam

Kalimutan na ang mga kamay na iyong hinawakan ,
Ang tahanang iyong binalik balikan

Masakit isipin na ang mata niya'y iba na ang tinitignan
Habang ang puso mo'y nananatiling sugatan.

Ang taong dati'y kilalang kilala
Ngayon ay mukhang madadaanan nalang sa kalsada

Mahirap man makalimutan ang  pinagsamahan, ang pagmamahal na ipinaglaban

Pero ubos na ang oras na inilaan
kailangan na iiwan ito sa nakaraan.

What will you do when you read this?

Will you pretend you didnt see it and feign indifference ,
Preferring to get lost in other people's lives
rather than
Looking back at the past 8 months of ours ?

Or maybe you'll take the time to commemorate every letter ,
Cherish the spaces in between each word and remember how our love felt
Real , so real and sound until it slowly waned before our eyes and
Each space half way through these string of emotions have never felt so far so distant so cold.

I'd like to think that you'd do the latter. It would give me comfort to picture you taking in the things I couldnt say , written down. That you would finally hear the thrums of my heart .these are the words it echoes. I couldn't reach you but I hope these words do ;

I talked about the end like it could come anytime , because it could. Calamity never gave warning when it would strike. I wanted you to be ready. I wanted  to secure your heart , shield it from devastation and harrow when it does happen ,When we reach our peak and dwindle to embers.

When this time comes i want
I want you to remember august , I said we just had to get by and we did.
Remember bookstores , "our sanctuary" you said amongst the pages of stories we wish we could live in ,surrounded by the happily ever afters that seem so unattainable.
Remember walks in crowded streets , hands intertwined , so you won't lose me in the tide of people.
And silent phone calls , no words were said but we didnt need them anyway.

I want you to remember the good and i know it might be painful but I hope that every step away from me takes you closer to happiness because I wish I could have given you more , I should have given you more. More kisses , more time . I should have given you everything but I could not.

And remember the last time I told you i loved you , the words caught up in my throat because it would mean this is the end . I couldnt give you everything but you have my last 'I love you'. It belongs to you.

Don't trust a mirror , it fools us you see
It tricks us and manipulates into what it thinks we should be

It twists your reflection
The mirror shows you things with a bad intention

It corrupts the mind
And uses the flaws it can find

To turn yourself against whats truly you
And makes you do things you shouldnt do

Dont trust a mirror , it dosent show your true beauty
Whats within you is the real magic , trust in me

Turn away from that fragile piece
And let your sadness cease

You are beautiful through and through
No matter what a mirror shows you

{mirror j.p.v}

Im off
Im off
To somewhere new
Im leaving
Im leaving
Im leaving you.

The effects of the recent devastations are still clear , this downward turn of events have left this nation in pieces

Strong winds of thoughts and unsaid words storm the mind and wishful thinking , daydreams have left the minds in need of help

The stocks of hope are low and scarce but broken promises
and unkept words are high

Flashfloods occur more often , waves of unshed tears wash the   planes of rosy cheeks

Wreckage of homes due to typhoons brought by you left no home to find refuge  , forced to look for a new heart to seek shelter in

And strong winds of memory blow , leaving everything that was in place , everything familiar , off course.

These chain of events have left the heart in a state of calamity , donations of love and comfort of words are appreciated.

This nation has been in a better state , let us wait and hope for better days.

I walk by the glow of lonely street lights

Retracing your footsteps , wondering where you've gone

You always wanted to get lost in unfamiliar cities

Did you lose your way back home ?

The chatter of strangers deafening me , voices of a thousand people (but none of them yours)

Did you get lost in the sea of lost souls ?

And lights always glimmered in your eyes

Did the city draw you in ?

They seem brighter than ever blinding me

Mocking me

This hollow town a painful reminder that you've gone.

When we're young we think our parents are heroes , kings , queens , everything they pretend to be just to put a smile on our faces

And then we grow up

We see the truth beneath everything and we though they were magical , perfect-

We grow up , we learn that they are just human , humans who make mistakes and are fragile and breakable. They are the very meaning of human.

I get it now why Pandora's box should have remained closed.

please excuse my words
the way they are messily strung together
a tangle of thoughts
of emotions
of everything I cannot show.