You swallow me with pride
and later spit me out.

Then, you pick me up again?

How foolish of you to think that
I can love you the same.

It is a love and hate game,
My duty is to destroy you
before you destroy me.

I am destructive,
No victories in this game;
Only loses.

Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

Don't just dream
         Awaken them
                   Pursue them
                              Live them.


Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

I've been staring at a blank page
Behind each word, there's joy and ache
Stirred in a cyclone
"You are strong, you are brave," whisperings on my ear.

I have so much to say
But nowhere to start (Sigh)
A blank page full of dreams and nonmaleficence.

Did you know, before you laid eyes on someone
Somebody else had first laid eyes on you?
Did you know, even though you never noticed true love
It noticed you?
Did you know,  before you even had a dream
It dreamed of you?
Did you know that this love beckons you in the mist of the rain?
In every season He is faithful.
Day by day, He whispers through the night:
"Do not fear for I am with you,  and I will never, ever, ever leave you."

Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

About how many times  did you had to go back and click that "edit" button?

You may constantly edit your poem but
You won't always be able to edit your life.



Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
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Is forever sincerely forever?

I don't have the necessary words to get your attention
I can't find the shortest way to talk to you
I feel unspoken, unwise, hidden and forgotten
I find myself walking through a hallway; doors are all open
I ask myself, "Which door 'till I finally get to you,"
One door leads me to another
I'm searching for the door that will lead me directly to you
Once I find it I hope you'll be there.

Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

It may look like a setup
No consent 
No scheduling ahead of time
No time to prepare
Raindrops falling
          D
               O
                    W
                           N
From an aching roof
Disappointment will ponder
Through each wall
Can you stop the inevitable?
You can't.
You must wait for the rainstorm to be over.
And so you must be reminded,
"Above All Else, Guard Your Heart."
Seasons
If we lose heart, we have lost everything.


Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

If you pick me, you will forever live in poetry land.
Flowers blooming all the time.
If you pick me, you will always be enlightened with the word.
In the word our life will be sustained.
In all directions, I will protect your heart, mind, and spirit.
Falling into temptation, never making it my intention.
If you pick me, our love will overflow like a river in every season of life.
Breathing life,
Exhaling hope, despite all the chaos in this world.
But before anything,
you must be His favorite one for me.


Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

I saw Him standing right by my door.
I was expecting a "May I come in,"
Instead He said, "Let Me in!"
This time He didn't ask for permission, it was a command to let Him in;
but even so, right by the door,
He waited patiently for my response.
What a gentlemen.


Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

Enough is Never Enough.


Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

I see it passing by
hour after hour
People getting off and others hoping in
While others fall asleep

Blinded by a glare
It's me against the world
Fighting to stay awake
Reluctantly awakened by a sound
I see it passing by
once again

So, I got up!
And hopped in!  
As I'm walking in
I see Him sitting there front row seat
Right behind Him, is an empty seat
Reserved just for me,
The windows crystal clear,
Pure light striking me

I am amazed by what I see,
For so long I've doubted
by gathering thoughts and regrets
Breathing toxic air that choked my life away

Suddenly a voice whispered,
"You are in the right place, You may not know where you are going, but it is well with your soul. You've been here before; my child it may seem like a long way home, but don't be afraid."

Choose faith, and believe that you are safe.

This train will lead you through the valley,  
Witnessing the most beautiful scenery,
Observing places where love and compassion
is absent but through it all
you will be a difference maker.

My steps, my sight, being ordered by the best pilot.

To be continued.......

Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserveds

What have you done?
giving hope but breaking hearts?
never will I look at you the same.



Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

TO: All who toss & turn
FROM: Insomnia
DATE: 12/30/2013
SUBJECT: What crosses your mind?

Late at night, what crosses your mind?
As you lay down to rest
And your mind overflows in darkness

What thoughts or worries come through?
Does your heart rejoice with thankfulness?

Is damage the phrase that doesn't let you rest?
What is it that makes you toss and turn like a wave?
Do you think about what you left behind?

Late at night, what crosses your mind?
Do you worry about what's ahead?
Do you worry about what’s aside?
Do you have any regrets?

Perhaps, you have not realize your own pain
Which causes you to toss and turn like a wave

Next time you toss & turn
Don’t hesitate to ask yourself
Why?
What makes me toss & turn?
"If you haven't lost what you have embrace it."

We are more than we know, we are strong!
Like the ocean current pulling you
Slowly asking you to follow the sea
In deep waters where many have gone
unable to swim but learning to float

Your mind is on trial
Your limits are your death and survival
Don’t stop you are strong
Cross the ocean and you will find there are no limits
like a mind-your mind-to be found

Once you cross this expanding sea
You will know what awaits
Remember it’s just your own self-esteem
Making you weak.


Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

Your absence is not my best remedy.
It doesn't help me; it doesn't make it unbelievable.
The aching assures me of your existence,
but memories are fading as if we never happened as if we never existed.

Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

One day you will be so lost,
you won't even remember where you left your cross.

Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

As i stand at midnight cold and shivering from the rain,
Thinking of the feeling of loneliness and an empty heart, pondering why my happiness went away.
I remember the decisions that brought me here.
I remember what the world offered me.
Yes, i was happy, but with an empty heart.
As i stand at midnight, i remember my best friends: regret, defeat, loneliness, and no purpose.
Then one day You came into my life,
you asked me if i had pain,  if i was tired, if felt lonely!
Yes, i was tired,
Yes, i had pain,
Yes, i felt all alone.
Suddenly, i felt You carrying me in Your arms, healing every scar within me, and offering everlasting love.
I felt your presence,
I couldn't see You, but I knew
You were with me.
I heard You whisper, "I will never leave you, I paid the price for your happiness, for your pain, for your loneliness, come and drink from my water and you shall never thirst again. Love me as I loved you first."

Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

A rose is active in the storm,
Its smell is an unexplainable redolence
It thrives to flourish.

A rose will wither away
inside a crystal vase or on firm ground.
A liquid substance is necessary to live and to rise,
just like He rose.

I wish to know the first time you blushed.
I wish I were there to pick you up when you fell as a child for the first time, and leaves fell to the ground.
I wish I were there the moment petals where stripped away from your body.

I wish to see you speak with radiant tenderness.
Your words and syllabus pierced through doors,
doors that were permanently locked in the heart of stone.

Meanwhile, I am just an ovule wishing to respond in a corollary way that slowly grows in a dark world
but like you rose
I will rise.

Surrounded by mistakes & regrets?
Labels don't define you
Are you running this race
Fighting demons inside your head?
I don't think I am nonchalant
If I don't scream at the top of my lungs;
I am alive, but death on the inside
Life is like a treasure chest
Full of gold, silver, trophies, souvenirs,
Miscellaneous items that at times mean nothing but an attachment of challenges and accomplishments; yet none define who you truly are on the inside.

Copyright © Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

Remember when you once thought you had lost it all?
Remember when you thought you would never see the sunrise or the rainbow?
Remember when you ran so fast,
Running away from fear,
Running away from love and
Running away from everyone who hurt you?
While running, you forgot that you were strong.

When you feel like running away remember that
You have been here before,
You have relived those thoughts before, and you have survived,
Do not quit when Life gets rough
Keep running,
Keep showing up where you are needed, where you are loved and appreciated.

Running can be tiring, and one day, you will realize that as you arrive at the finish line, you will need to slow down.

The finish line is just ahead, be filled with joy.
Keep your eyes fixed on the Pioneer and Perfecter of your Faith.

Stand
          Through
                           Odd
                                    Pain




Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.

Have you ever fallen off a tree?
Oh, let me tell you a secret!
Age does not discriminate!
The fall can be so painful that even scars left behind
Will make you weep at night,
The deepest scars are full of regrets,
But the sweetest revenge is to rise once again!

Copyright© Cynthia Ulloa
All rights reserved.