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Jan 11 · 100
Finds
Left To Rot Jan 11
In these lonely afternoons
roaming around the streets,
sunny or rainy sky,
I always find what I'm looking for
and I claim it in no time.
Jan 7 · 44
Errors
Left To Rot Jan 7
My mistakes consume me,
eating my body inside out,
a torturing, deadly fever
with no way to cease.

My skin feels hot,
almost like it'll melt
and expose my rotten flash
for everyone to see.
Jan 6 · 20
Black bird
Left To Rot Jan 6
There's a black bird in my heart,
it's like Bukowski's blue one,
but instead of sleeping with me
it keeps me up at night
and it's demands are not fun.
Jan 5 · 39
Heads Down
Left To Rot Jan 5
How empty is this house
without echoes of your phone
ringing insistently from the next room...

How empty is this house
without the sound of you typing,
making someone else's phone ring
in someone else's home.

How empty is this house
without the image of you,
a perfect statue, sitting,
staring down at your phone.
Dec 2021 · 414
A Walk
Left To Rot Dec 2021
I'm going out tonight,
watch the street grow lights
as the sky blacks out
and the stars are lit.
I'll listen to new voices,
men and women talking,
I'll see dogs play fetch
as I slowly walk.
Dec 2021 · 223
Sieben
Left To Rot Dec 2021
The sun looks brighter,
the people look better,
the sky looks "bluer",
the world looks like heaven.
If you ask me about my state of mind,
my drinking status,
I can only say
my "shot count" is way more than seven.
Dec 2021 · 281
Fair
Left To Rot Dec 2021
Some of the weights you carry
aren't even yours to handle,
drop a few along the way.
Little stuff season.
Nov 2021 · 1.3k
1 AM
Left To Rot Nov 2021
And when we run out of things to talk about,
may our souls still be fond of each other
as we sit comfortably in silence.
Nov 2021 · 338
I'm the Good Guy, Duhh
Left To Rot Nov 2021
Beloved son (of a)...
Sweet mother...lover.
yes, please,
write this on the gravestone
I'll rest under.
You must mention my NPO
for the poor on our streets,
you can still see me adopting stray dogs.
I FED HOMELESS KIDS!
Remember my kind smile
brightened by the sun,
or the flash of a camera,
helping cats stuck on trees.
I'm gonna leave a lot of footage
for my memorial, but you see,
it's important that you remind people
that I, a good guy, have done all these things.
Oct 2021 · 158
Collapse
Left To Rot Oct 2021
I want to do more, and feel less
I want to be better somehow.
Yes, I'm working on it
but this is what I'd call relapse.

I'm collapsing under this weight,
my burden is the past on my back,
also doubt, fear for the future
and what the present means.

I wouldn't say this out loud
but after all, I'm kinda scared.
I pace around and beg myself
for an answer I'm not sure I have.
Oct 2021 · 436
By Chance
Left To Rot Oct 2021
The bus is not so full now,
through the glass the sky begins to redden,
my bag's on my lap,
my eyes are on the road.
In this rectangular metal box
I pierce the city's veins,
watch them pump, pulsate
with people I may, or may not, meet someday.
Oct 2021 · 235
Balloon Soul
Left To Rot Oct 2021
The strange feeling of floating,
dissociating from my skin,
sliding between this world
and something beyond.
I'll keep it together until I'm alone,
I'll ignore the clarity, for now.
I'm detached from my past,
present, whatever is to come.
Well this feels good,
but at the same time it's wrong.
Oct 2021 · 80
Imperfect
Left To Rot Oct 2021
You're not perfect
and if that bothers you,
it shouldn't.

You can have nice eyes,
polite words, a good heart,
and then you might not have money.

You can own cars, houses,
a couple companies,
and be full of hollowness.

You can be a good dancer,
and not be a good singer.

You're not perfect,
and that's okay,
you can improve yourself,
none of us are perfect either.
Oct 2021 · 440
Denial
Left To Rot Oct 2021
I've been running away
from what's the most important:
myself, and everything I offer.

And I know I'm not the only one
looking for comfort in places
that should instead be avoided.

I tell myself it's okay to let go,
try to be constructive,
but the chicken inside me
wants to keep me running away
when I feel like stopping.
Oct 2021 · 79
Leave It
Left To Rot Oct 2021
Yet again the moon rises,
indifferent to daily stress,

despite all doubt and pendency,
it hits the hammer,
and demmands you to accept.

It brings much needed closure
so before you move on, friend,
you can take a rest.
Sep 2021 · 283
Allies
Left To Rot Sep 2021
Things that bring genuine joy
often come randomly,
but require sensibility
to recognize their bright.

Allies we didn't ask for
often come our way
...
almost as if we're offered help
when we get too drained.

Lonely nights blur all beauty,
invisible curtains of selfdoubt
hide the infinite, starry sky.

So it's always nice to have a talk,
sometimes I feel like I'd be lost
if I didn't have people of vision
to guide me when I go blind.
Sep 2021 · 263
Nine
Left To Rot Sep 2021
Before I met you I had nine lives,
safely preserved, well kept,
it's hard to believe I lost four
just in the day we met.
You spent three months around,
I lost three more each hangout,
now you're gone and I only have two,
but I'd give them to you without a doubt.
Sep 2021 · 308
Busride
Left To Rot Sep 2021
Riding the bus at night
is one of my few comforts in life.
Reminds me of happy days,
returning home from the park.
I remember a tall white building
standing, reaching for the dark sky
with red neon lights spelling "MOTEL"
I felt compelled to come inside.
I don't know.
Sep 2021 · 55
Scars
Left To Rot Sep 2021
Many different levels of pain,
some hidden, some explicit,
some creeping, some screaming,
hiding, refusing to go away.

Many attempts to hide what's within,
many shots, many laughs, many made up dreams,
none of them able to disable the feels,
none of them able to redeem.

To make up for past scars
open more in different places,
damage different tissues, cry again
and call it a day.
Sep 2021 · 337
20---21
Left To Rot Sep 2021
The oldest form of entertainment,
neon lights, loud music, stranger;
that was the last night of a cycle
for today I'm no longer 20.

A buddy, also tripping,
after the bottle is empty.
The night is young...
but Monday morning **** sure isn't.

An aspirine and lots of water,
dizzy, nauseated;
the world span, when it stood still... I didn't.
Aug 2021 · 353
Tough
Left To Rot Aug 2021
Everything requires composure,
discipline to look collected,
smart decisions, dry eyes,
get up from the ground.
You need to look tough,
whether you'll join the army
or sell cans by the pound.
Aug 2021 · 79
Moon
Left To Rot Aug 2021
Triple crescent moon,
one on the water, one on the sky,
and a third one, the best, in your eyes.
Stars look brighter today
and I might have a theory:
the universe gave you the spotlight.
Aug 2021 · 196
Hopes
Left To Rot Aug 2021
I keep high hopes in a little shelf,
hidden from the public,
gathering dust.
Like the toys I owned as a kid,
my skate as a teen,
now my pride as an adult,
they might eventually be sold.
Aug 2021 · 205
Trip
Left To Rot Aug 2021
Waves going up then down,
as coconut trees dance to the wind,
and the sun sets on the orange sky.
The Jeep slides along the coast,
I feel the salty fresh air
easing the stress in my disguise.
Aug 2021 · 62
Pl4ns
Left To Rot Aug 2021
Inflamed ambition,
potent visions, hopes,
latent plans of action...
Trifling in my own version
and order of things.
In the middle of chaos,
the only factor
that fails to enter the equation
is the means that'll enable me
to achieve my end.
Aug 2021 · 111
(E)And
Left To Rot Aug 2021
Desire... maddening...
...destructive inside.
What a waste of a healthy body
designated to be mine.
These healthy limbs have no use
under the command of my crippled mind.
My head spins in disgust for my own kind,
for myself, for my equals, for my life.
This need is like acid, corroding my every cell,
leaving me cornered on my own edge.
My skin is burning... and it's desire,
a primal urge haunting me at night.
Aug 2021 · 774
Colors
Left To Rot Aug 2021
You have tricky eyes,
they lie.

Outside they look grey
but you have rainbows inside.
Aug 2021 · 216
Comparison
Left To Rot Aug 2021
Other people look so efficient,
they look so collected,
I wish I could see that in my reflection.
Anybody else seems so lucky,
their lives look so much better,
I wish I was in someone else's skin
but I suspect the portrayal isn't accurate.
Aug 2021 · 721
Traffic Fall
Left To Rot Aug 2021
Emerald eyes shine,
lit by bright stars upon,
the moon is so close,
it's like it's drawn
to the street lights.
A million cars around,
beeps, drifts, signs,
but I don't mind the rush hour
if you are my ride.
Aug 2021 · 78
Grey Days
Left To Rot Aug 2021
It's just a grey day, dark sky, rain clouds
these grey days come and go,
gloomy, empty, boring, dull.
The sun will come again soon,
then you'll go outside and be proud
for yet another victory over the storm.
Grey days are worth the fight
'cause when the sunny ones come
you'll be alright.
Jul 2021 · 157
Observation
Left To Rot Jul 2021
A thousand pairs of judgy eyes,
grey, blue, brown, green,
all colors spinning around me
attached to bitter faces,
expressive frowns.
Jul 2021 · 176
Jimmy Boy
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Jimmy learned that gay was bad,
unnatural, the pastor said,
his friends were all about girls,
so Jimmy played along.
At some point in high school
Jimmy realized
a very hidden desire of his,
he liked a guy.
Jimmy was desperate,
how could it be?
He had been with girls,
never with guys,
but how would he know?
He never tried!
He kept the secret to himself,
a shameful burden of his own,
until one day Jimmy boy came across a term: BI.
Jul 2021 · 239
Purpose
Left To Rot Jul 2021
There it is, in the back of my mind,
gagged and handcuffed to a pipe,
covered in bruises and scars,
the long forgotten meaning of my life.
                               Humming a melody of hope,
                               stripped of dignity, insane,
                               beaten, mocked, almost tamed,
                               hoping to be rescued someday.
Jul 2021 · 241
Pretty
Left To Rot Jul 2021
A million stars shine above,
the cloudless sky reflects on the water,
the navy blue lake absorbs the full moon
and I quietly watch from a safe distance,
alone, on the green grass, I'm afraid to blink
and realize all this beauty is just a dream.
Jul 2021 · 87
Drained
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Discomfort, exhaustion, constant distraction,
my eyes won't keep open,
my thoughts won't make sense.
I'm so tired but I can't get proper sleep
when it's time to rest.
Even writing is a bother,
but it's all I have for relief
so I'll get my **** laptop and press some keys.
Jul 2021 · 200
Alive
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Balance, moderation, discipline,
all necessities for a healthy life,
but from time to time,
it's fun to exceed limits,
give in to new sensations,
as long as you know where to draw the line.
Jul 2021 · 104
Eternal Instead
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Let's make ammends,
under the covers,
underwater, on the sand.
Go outside and hold hands,
kiss, hug and pretend,
like we have hope again.
Let's... come on, let's make ammends,
until we figure out where I start and you end.
Jul 2021 · 168
Too Old To Care
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Two rocking chairs on a front porch,
they watch the sunset,
lips curled up on perm smiles,
satisfied solely in each other.
Shots fired in the distance,
police cars and ambulances,
screams and loud pleads,
their vibe won't change.
Jul 2021 · 77
Defeatist
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Now I live entirely by Murphy's law,
problem foreseen, problem solved,
spotting tragedies from miles away,
found beforehand, never lost.
Gruesome images suffocate my thoughts,
sometimes I'm irrational, not alright
sitting by the nearest escape route to run,
or resigned to lose the fight and die.
Jul 2021 · 71
Gone
Left To Rot Jul 2021
You're written and rewritten in my mind,
I remove bits, add parts,
you might not have The Bluest Eyes in Texas,
but you're haunting me tonight.
Jul 2021 · 243
Haunted
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Some places hold grudges,
they incorporate agony into their walls,
blood stains embedded on the floor,
stories felt even before they're told.
Jul 2021 · 233
Time Plans
Left To Rot Jul 2021
"Where do you wanna be in five years?"
Golden sky, dead friends, snowy clouds.
"Where do you wanna be in five years?"
Breathing heavy, racing heart. Chill, you're fine!
"Where will you be in five years?"
Hopefully, under the ground.
Jul 2021 · 71
Other Me
Left To Rot Jul 2021
The other version of myself
stared at me all night, yesterday.
He sat by my bed, in my chair:
"Sleep is boring." He said.
I told him to go away,
but he won't get up and leave
so I ignored him and closed my eyes.
But, wait... who is the other one,
is it him or is it me?
Jul 2021 · 71
Unlikely
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Clearly darkened visions,
painless painful lessons,
different days, different versions,
different verses, verifications.
Done, dysphoric,
a kind demon, a tidy mess,
deadly antidote. Help!
I'm filled with emptiness.
Jul 2021 · 71
Over and Over
Left To Rot Jul 2021
I'm currently fighting a fair ammount of battles
at the same time,
and I've never felt more lost in my life.
Juggling with my own feelings,
sleep the day away, think all night,
then unwind, take a break, restart.
Jul 2021 · 100
Peace Out
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Night, cuties and pies,
whether you're opening or closing your eyes,
I wish you the same ammount of luck.
If your day is starting, have a nice day,
if the moon is up there, sleep tight,
if it's noon, remember, no shots before five.
Tomorrow will be a brand new story to tell,
more lines to write, more ideas to sell,
another chance to outdo yourself.
Random one. But I felt like it.
Jul 2021 · 214
You Be You
Left To Rot Jul 2021
You weren't born to be your family's dream come true,
to wear what people choose for you,
to feel guilty for never being good enough.
You know that perfect cousin you were taught to admire?
They're just as troubled as you are,
perhaps they mess up just as much
but they cover up their tracks.
I can confirm, I've seen the lies,
I've seen the remorse in their eyes,
that is, while they still have any.
So, don't take life as it is,
change a little, for a change,
do what you gotta do, life is too strange
to have only one way to succeed.
Jul 2021 · 222
Feel
Left To Rot Jul 2021
There's this feeling inside me,
I can't describe just right
but my best try
is to say that I feel trapped.
Like a dog chasing it's tail,
or a hamster on a wheel.
Perhaps I'm a wingless bird
whose only desire is to fly.
Jul 2021 · 44
Grown
Left To Rot Jul 2021
Blatant battle cries echo on the cities,
rebels in the making, school's out.
Do the parents not know what they've done?
Religiously raised revolutionaries,
tamed by nothing and no one.

Looking back at their childhoods,
nothing but prayers, punishments, hidden threats,
cruel, alienating isolation, God, their only friend.

Now you'll see your children rise against it,
they won't follow your rules, won't be you.
You'll cry tears of blood for the control lost
but trust me, you had you turn, now contempt.
Jul 2021 · 53
Rebel Soul
Left To Rot Jul 2021
A suspiciously botherless life,
calls for me from the shadows,
like Hensel and Gretel's
convenient candy house.

"Follow their commands and you'll be fine,
be chaste, be obedient, praise purity,
you'll have nothing but good times!"
Like building castles on the sand.

They preach like pros, I'll give them that
unfortunately, I can't choose my path,
my soul is a rebel and it doesn't bend.
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