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Jan 2023 · 1.2k
A Cascade of Heartbreak
Navahopi119 Jan 2023
Glittering
Fractured
Fractals

Shimmering in all
The wrong
Places.

Time.
Time is non-existent
How I wish it would

Rip me from this moment
This agonizing
Tormenting moment.

Then it's over
As quickly as I could blink
Gone.

Nothing left but this
Lifeless heart
I once called Home.

It's only in that moment
Can I see you
Clearly.

Continued visitations
Continually mar
This heavy heart.

Yet

Every whisper, utterance,
Intrusion
Brings me here.

As if summoned
Just to endure
Pain.

Tears welling
Through already puffy eyes
I cast another look.

Through the cascading
Fragments
Of this broken reality

Only to peer at a face of a stranger
Distorted by resentment, anguish
Heartache.

Contained no longer
Time crashes like a wave
Leaving me alone.

Glittering
Fractured
Fractals

Shimmering pieces
That once contained a dream
Scattered at my feet
Jul 2020 · 208
A Falter in my Step
Navahopi119 Jul 2020
They talk about a world without
Hope.
Without
Mercy.

But never before had I ever met such a
Pure soul
In the form of
You

Unbeknownst to me, you became the
Peace
I turned to seek.

This bitter misunderstanding that has lead me to the thinking I now have.

It has crumbled this positive outlook I use to forsee.

That is until you reached out to
Me.
Leading me away from all this misery with your
Beautiful
Heart.

Allowing me to pass into your veil of
Love.

Your mere presence stilling my mind.
Dissipating my sense of
Uselessness

Quick to
Forgive
And
LOVE
Patient enough to let me Grow.

Never before had I met such a pure soul.

Nor did I realize.
Forsaking appreciation and the comfort of your solitude.

Never before...

Until I lost
You.
Jun 2018 · 270
The Piercing Night
Navahopi119 Jun 2018
The hour grows late.
The silence sets in.
The Night haunts me again once again.
Rest alludes me and sleep is but a
     broken dream.
Hope foolishly placed in a 'morrow
     that may not come.
Suffocating and broken it lays.
That which was once me.
For I am no longer, but what
     nightmare my fear feeds.
-Navahopi119
Apr 2018 · 309
My Family
Navahopi119 Apr 2018
A never ending wave of chaos
A fit of giggles and laughs
Tempers lost and toys thrown
An endless playlist of Karaoke

These are my memories of us.
Memories that I'll hold dear,
Or memories I'll hold for leverage

A story of a lifetime
Full of embarrassment
Pride
And Love

My life
My love
My competition
My protection
My pride and inspiration

My family
Happy National Siblings Day
Apr 2018 · 874
Just to Appreciate
Navahopi119 Apr 2018
Have you ever just stopped
Stop to admire the stars
In the calm cool night
Just to appreciate.

Have you ever stopped
Stop to admire the flowers
On a warm sunny day
Just to appreciate

Have you ever stopped
Stop to admire the trees
During a mild fall breeze
Just to appreciate

Have you ever stopped
Stop to admire the mountains
During a brisk winter stroll
Just to appreciate

Well I have stopped
Stop to just admire the beauty
The beauty that is you
Forever appreciating
All that you are
And all that you do

So tell me
Have you ever stopped?
.
-Navahopi119
What beauty do you find in the world surrounding you?
Mar 2018 · 788
What We Face
Navahopi119 Mar 2018
It never ceases
To amaze
The worries to come,
Like a sort of frienzed craze
When comes the Day.

A day of new beginning,
Of a fresh new start.
Is it the eagerness
To make our mark
Or the fear of a broken heart?

Is it a voice of reason
Or whispers of doubt
For uncertainty we face
Do we fear what may come about
Or unwillingness and like children we pout?

Or rather do we feel
With no purpose we live.
Our reflection screaming Inadequate
Proving nothing of value left to give
Injuring ourselves with our makeshift shiv

No matter the reason
For you, my heart I lay
We'll face this together
Day by day
So let come what may
-Navahopi119
Feb 2018 · 955
What an Occasion
Navahopi119 Feb 2018
Sometimes I like to
Sit & Think
When all the world is
Quiet & Asleep.

Most times the voices are
Loud & Mean
But tonight the wind
Whispers & Fans.

Delighting to watch the Leaves
Play & Dance
Causing my soul to
Lift & Fly.

For once I am
Clear & Free
Without my despair to
Hold & Bound.

Allowing me to
Walk & Ponder
Looking back on all I've
Achieved & Conquered

For once I'm full of
Happiness & Glee
For Once I am
ME.

-Navahopi119
It seem like life is always filled with despair, so what an occasion it is to have those good days.
Feb 2018 · 524
My Armour
Navahopi119 Feb 2018
She said she wanted a Knight in shining armour
But what she doesn't realize.
All the Dents, Cuts, and Scratches
Are due to the effort I applied to better myself
Each Battle, Conflict, and Barrier
May have left their marks on me
And yet here I stand

The armour I wear may be
Grimy, Gritty, and Dull
But I wouldn't wish it any other way
Because that would mean
To erase all I worked for
And all that I strive to be.

She said she wanted a Knight in Shining armour
Lean, Clean, and Pristine.
Well I wish her the best
On her foolish quest
Because I have more battles to war.

-Navahopi119
Jan 2018 · 820
The Clock on the Wall
Navahopi119 Jan 2018
Tick Tick Tick
The clock on the wall
Almost melodic, like
A metronome it plays

Tick Tick Tick
The time seems to crawl
But the thoughts hit me
Hard like a spike.
The voices like a frenzied craze.

Tick Tick Tick
The melody continues.
Trying to keep calm and stay cool
But the feeling continues to flow and ensue

Tick Tick Tick
The collection embues
Collecting and gathering, they pool.
I try my hardest to subdue.

Tick Tick Tick
The clock on the wall
continues to countdown
To my inevitable outburst

Tick Tick Tick
These thoughts continue to appall.
Attempting to drown
That which lies on me, this curse.

TICK
TICK
TICK

Then it chimes
It's inevitable
I'm responsible from my crimes
I should've known it was inescapable

The clock on the wall no longer ticks

-Navahopi119
Jan 2018 · 603
We Stand
Navahopi119 Jan 2018
The institutionalized Racism in America and inequality
is not something by chance.
When there can be persecution for
Something as Spiritual Dance.
There is a bit of unspoken truth,
one that I don't expect you to understand.
There's all evidence, there's all proof.
But no mater the devastation, we stand.
Let me take you back to a time,
to a land where proud Nations stood.
The loss of our land,
Culture is nothing short of a crime.
Our Grief and our passion is often... Misunderstood.
Walking on a trail of broken treaties
our feet bled and our hearts cried.
As they march on indifferently
while our Women and Children died.
We break away from the systems
that we're mean to divide,
reawaken the truth we all keep inside.
But no matter the destruction and devastation,
from the ashes, like a Phoenix we rise.
So my friend, regardless of the poverty within the reservation
It still will not silence our Strong Warrior's cries.
- S. Busick, R. Kayton, B. Powell, E. Sibley, 119
This is a poem that was written for a class assignment as a group project to help illustrate the history and story behind the injustice acted upon the Indigenous Nations in the United States.
Jan 2018 · 492
Why Are You Still Here?
Navahopi119 Jan 2018
I sit here in the dark,
     the emptiness that
     envelopes me.
                         There is but one question,
                                  one meaning and purpose,
                                  one that I can't fathom.
          Through my life, this simple,
                   inadequate life
                   there are things I've done.
                                                 I've hurt people, torment,
                                                           through my explosion of
                                                            expr­ession, Anger... Silence
               I know I've hurt you,
                         as painful as that is
                         to reflect.
  Yet, through it all,
          you're still here,
          withstand, ever present.
      No matter what explosion,
               what outburst I apply,
                here you are... Why.
                                                            ­        You say it's out of love,
                                                           ­                    you say that no matter,
                                                         ­                      no matter what... Love
                                          I've pushed, I've prodded,
                                                     pushing buttons, breaking barriers,
                                                     when I shouldn't...
                                               I don't mean to hurt you,
                                                      I never do, I never did,
                                                      But still you comfort... calm.
                        No matter the pain,
                                 the pain that I've caused,
                                 here you are, caring, loving.
                                                         ­     I know that you could do better,
                                                         ­         better than what I offer
                                                           ­       a seemingly endless barrage..
   Why? Why do you stay,
               stay in the place of endless,
               endless pain... Why?
                                               Is this the love everyone speaks of,
                                                       if so, why am I,
                                                       why am I so ashamed, undeserving.
                          I try to push you away,
                                  because I know I...
                                  I hurt you, yet you stay.
                                      I love you, but I don't,
                                             I don't want you to hurt,
                                             not anymore, let me leave... Please
But no, you won't let me,
         you continue to love,
         a love that is so... undeserving.
   You've done so much,
               so much love, but why...
               why do you put yourself... in pain?
                                                 I don't think that I can,
                                                            ­I don't think that I can
                                                            e­ver make you happy, ever again
                                      Yet you smile, a smile so
                                                    full of love, patience
                                                    an understanding that I can't accept.
         I ponder and I question,
                   no matter how I drag it out...
                   Why are you still here?... here with me...
-Navahopi119
Oct 2017 · 305
I am Not a Poet
Navahopi119 Oct 2017
By no means am I a poet
And everyone knows it
It's not hard to find the time
A make a couple of rhymes

By no means am I a poet
Everthing I write shows it
Rather what I write
Is as simple as flying a kite

By no means am I a poet
But don't ask me to prove it
I just live my life
And I try to show it without strife
-Navahopi119
Oct 2017 · 345
The Love We Have to Offer
Navahopi119 Oct 2017
Throughout Life
We often wonder what Love is.
For some... It's but a simple Word
For others... It's an action
For me
Through it all
It's a way of Life.
How we go about our simple Life
Day by Day
Step by Step
Never once
Wavering with the Love
The Love that we have to offer
-Navahopi119

— The End —