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Mya Baertlein May 2019
Do you ever feel like you are stuck?
It hits me at a friends house at 3 am when all I want to do is sleep but it’s so ******* hot and my mind is running. No one is awake and all you want to do is run, run away from all my problems or run towards more problems. But I  just sit there stuck because either way there are problems. Why is he still my comfort, why does he make me smile. Why aren’t these the same guy. Why the hell can I not be happy? Why can’t I do this? I feel like I am always at check and just waiting to hear checkmate but it never comes. Every day is different but I feel the same way.
Mya Baertlein Apr 2019
I haven't seen you in two years
We haven't talked for a year and some months
Everything ended so badly
I had convinced myself that I was over you
But when you saw me, you asked to talk
I said Okay
Than that phrase, I'm sorry
You said I miss you and I still love you
My heart melted and I caved
We're talking again and I feel happy
Part of me thinks I'm making a mistake
The other part thinks we might work out
Mya Baertlein Jan 2019
One day
That’s all it takes
To know who is the one
For me, my mind knew from one day
My heart didn’t trust my mind at first
My body wanted it to be true
My heart hoped it wasn’t
But a couple more months it knew
My heart now hopes he is the one
He’s sweet, loving, caring and, gentle
And I’m happy
He is different then all the other guys
And he is mine and I don’t plan on letting go
My mind knew what the heart didn’t want to accept
Mya Baertlein Oct 2018
I never knew what true love was until I met you
When I first saw you I knew that I loved you more than I ever thought I would
Most people probably think I'm talking about that one dream guy when in reality I'm talking about my little sister
She is the reason why I'm alive I need to stay strong for her and she is 16 years younger than me and has my heart already
Mya Baertlein Oct 2018
Sometimes I feel like I'm too damaged to be loved. If I don't love myself no one will. I just want to fall in love and not overthink it and feel like they will leave over my imperfections. They will run away right when I need them the most. Why am I ever enough? Why will no one help me?
Mya Baertlein Sep 2018
I read the text and then blocked you
then I picked up a blade and put it to my wrist
I see my phone ringing its my sister
I pick up and set down the blade
I picked a marker and made the lines on my arm
the lines i was going to make with you
Maybe a different day
Mya Baertlein Aug 2018
We all have our way of destroying ourselves
Some people take a blade to their bodies
Others make themselves feel numb with drugs
For me, I took my head and lightly hit it against the wall
or my nails to my skin till I would bleed
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