I have a heart with a hole
like a strainer in my soul
so I hold to larger hope

I have desires so deep
and the climb is so steep
I hold to a longer rope

I have darkness deep down
fog of fear hides the ground
I hold stronger along the *****

To have and to hold
one thing I am told
you have just enough hold
to cope.

I can only carry these thoughts
as far as the wind will blow
Even when I lay me down
they’ll dictate where I go
Beside a tree I find my rest
only to rise when they’d say so
Beneath its branch I sow a thought
like leaves I watch it grow

By a river I make my bed
where my thinking freely flows
like rushing water, runs my head
my thoughts ebb and flow
Near the fire I watch the flames
I light my thoughts aglow
they’ll burn tomorrow new desires
I have no strength to say ‘no’

I will never say
It is unfair that I am one
always sacrificing for you
whether you love me
or not, I do not
love you to receive
to change you or I leave
I love being the one
who loves you, regardless
I truly do

and If I be not willing
to lay my life down in truth
or be compelled by love
and sacrifice as I do
then please, please
walk away and tell me,
I’m not worthy of the way,
you would have
loved me too

they call it gloom;
that room across
the corridor
between
you
and doom

that feeling
of despair
the damp air of
musty fumes
and rusty hues
of care, where
feelings there
dare to never
ever bloom

I am
alright

…tonight

like I was
okay

…today

as for
tomorrow

…who knows
the sorrow

…

but hey

“It’s a dandy of a day”
I heard her say
as I hooked my charm
into her arm
She sighed,
with eyes half closed
a ’Gone With The Wind’ pose
and ‘mmm’ for a hum
we locked our kiss
and kissed like this
till our mouths were blistering numb
we made kissing an art
till ’pop’ went my heart
for the day had only begun
******* on a pillow
and fibres to swallow
when I awoke with the alarm

a sower of seeds
brought me to my knees
by a swift smell of a flower
he promised to sell
the seeds of it’s smell
if I’d water it every hour
I said i‘ll give it the sun
if he gave me just one
more smell of its aroma
he asked why not have all?
and need not ask anymore
when you hold and harness it’s power
I said, if that be the case for my soul
give me not in part but the whole
and I’ll grant it an eternal shower
and so he planted as he went
the seed of its scent
into the soil of my heart
forever

a tear dropped
from the face of despair
and wove it’s way down
it’s entangled hair
weaving through waves
of dry dead strands
it untangled the knots
the braids and the bands
sliding ever so slowly
soothing out like oil
every curve and curl
of every anxious coil
straightening the stress
as it falls to the ground
shaking your head off the mess
let your hair hang down

I weave words into woods
and forests of dreams
feeding your fear with stories
of giants and beans
stalks and straws
cracked golden eggs
scrawny fingers
a glass eye and
wood for a leg
to aid your sleep
come werewolves and bears
ghosts and ghouls
for a nicer nightmare
so come now hither
come to the deep
and dream
a dream my dear
if you dare to sleep

This spoon is bigger than my plate
these green peas are bigger than your mouth
like the big words that are bigger than this conversation
It’s making this evening hard to swallow
your big eyes are bigger than my lies
and this lie is bigger than the both of us
you tell me to be the bigger man
now here I am

I’m not going to be famous
selling strawberries
writing poems
or preaching till we perish
especially, not through
this poem
your poem
or any we may cherish
considering the pressure I am under
and the number
of one more follower
to follow me
while I’m following your poetry
I may write and write I do
because like you I like them too
and though they may be the best
I know I can be my worst critic
whether I loathe or I like it
I wont lay my pen to rest
with my words and ways
till then, I’ll have my own novels read
and applaud my own plays
and be famous
in my own head

I’m building a bridge
from my heart to yours
crossing over troubled water
my shore to your shores
one end to another
we’re stringing the sun
with the moon to the other
till the whole worlds been strung
so if our hearts ever dangle
and if you ever hope to jump
come hang on with your life
and I’ll hold you up

I dug a trench
to keep you close
growing the hedges
with rope and hose
I filled a moat
to keep you in
a buoy, no boat
if you tried to swim
I planted flowers
bushes, no tree
lest you could climb
and found you free
I paved a road
there you cut a path
far from the garden
away from my arms
now I’m building a bridge
across a sad sea
if you ever decide
to come back to me.

the wind whispered me a secret
and I hid it from the sun
buried beneath the shade of a shadow
only till the passing light is done

yet a falling star flickered a rumour
till all sparkled the same lie
whispers spread across the heavens
and a black veil covered the sky

the secret lay buried in dark deception
amidst the still night of hidden lies
where the stars shine in secrecy
as to why the sun will no longer rise

side by side

           we sit

as far as the east is from the northern sky

we dodge eyes between the distance

          and us

the faded voices climbing hills

turn into the silhouettes of hope

and the holy laughter

of dying

       children

if these tears are no proof of my apology
will you accept a drop of my blood
I am tired of saying I am sorry
bathing in your forgiveness of mud
if tears are not enough to win mercy
then death is the remedy for life
my need for you to forgive me
is as thick as the need for a knife

I’d love to slice your eyes in little pieces
scatter them across night skies
so you go and glow my nights away
from the starlight in your eyes

I’d love to pluck a kiss from your lips
to plant in my garden of growing weeds
so when all fails to bloom too soon
your sweet scent is sent from your seeds

I’d love to clip the smile off your face
and toss it to the sun at morn  
so when night has lost its fight for light
I’ll have burnt your smile into the dawn.

I’d love to cut open your heart of hope
carve a heart beat out with a knife  
so if my passion is dead after I’ve bled
you may bring me back to life

anything that reflected you
from glass to a mirror
I would shine and polish
till I saw you clearer

anything that sounded like you
from a poem to a song  
I would sing and recite  
and quote you all day long

anything that resembled you
a painting, a clipping, a frame
I would keep, collect, store
and label with your name

Yes, anything
absolutely anything
that came remotely close to being you
made up my life and all I ever knew

my whole being was all of you
and you were all I became to be
It’s no wonder now without you
I spend my time in search of me

i will try to write a poem without using the moon
ignoring the language of angels and gods
of heavenly hosts and celestial beings
they seem to always take the place of the way I am really feeling
i will try to write with words you have always wanted me to use
but this time I will choose
between the white tunes and hues
and maybe you will understand me
maybe you will see
when I pull back the drapes from the poetry
with out all the shy stars and bashful butterflies
you will see,
Me.

This is the first poem I wrote after I died
I am thinking of the next line
like my life no longer depended on it

The second poem I wrote, I am searching  through words I had said and lied

By the time I finished my third poem
all I find is regret and reason to put my pen to rest, lay my papers aside
and could have just simply said
“I love you”, while I was alive

Every great poem begins with a great line
but not this poem, this poem of mine
it has its flaws and it ends with rhyme
like every poem I write, every time
But every poet can be great, I heard it said
if you write a poem, not to be scared
to be judged, or write to be read
keep it real, raw and great in your head

I am not afraid
to send you my ❤️ in a text
if you ignore or delete
it is not the one in my chest

that is for one and my only
it will not go to waste
like the ❤️ in this message
I can copy and paste

so if by chance you reply
with a real kiss
without an emoji, you win
my real heart, like this

I was short of a dream
walking along a quiet stream
by a salty shore of pain unseen
people asked, “Where have you been ?”

My eyes red, through things I reap
I have drunk the sting of tears I weep
and drowned my soul in shallow deep
cried out my heart in silent sleep

None to hear or heal my pain
I kept it hidden inside a grain
with roots thick through seasons of rain
twisting branches upon barren plain

Till I cried no more, red eyes can’t see
and  lay myself beneath this tree
budding bitterness as bitter can be
I fed off its fruits and buried me

Let me burn evermore
In a way I have never burned
before

Till the ashes
of my passions
cover the darkest night

Let us all learn to burn
till we yearn for light
and fight for sight
no more

His son wanted to play ball
So he got him a dog

He wanted to go fishing
So he got him a fish

His son wanted some advice
So he got him a book

He wanted some time
So he got him a watch

He just wanted a dad
But dad never got him

She asked me to write her a poem,
this is what I wrote…

She dreams of winter winds
that blow her breath and smiles
She likes the simple things
like walks, talks and style
and when she asks me for my time
I know she’s only teasing
she knows that without her love
I could not go on singing

For this reason then,
she told me to sing a song
and this is what I sang…

My voice is not the song of kings
nor any angel will heed my cry
But of all the sweetest things I bring
the sound of silence I will try
Not to strangle the loudest tear
or hang a hope of sky
As long as my love she loves me
before the day my love does die

She told me then to tell a tale
one that will never end…

Allow me to turn you into a book
I’ll breathe your story into the breeze
turn the pages of your eyes  
and whisper waves among the seas
Let them leave your soil of sorrow
Let them fill your dug up hole
find some shade within the shadow
where branches green within your soul

She stares weakly at the rest of me,
and asks, “Are there no other words
you keep?”

I look into her dying eyes
words take her final breath

My love lies down to sleep

To all my friends and followers

https://hellopoetry.com/poem/4505530/merry-christmas/

Do not fly higher than the sky
although eagles often try
keep your head instead, below
where worms squirm the earth
and grow
along roots wrought from trees
crouching out to open seas
when cages are without keys
crawls a hope, when wings can’t set
you free.

I woke
the morning
for it had slept in
still in bed
and I too keen
…waiting
to turn its head
I gave
a nudge
it gave
a grudge
and rolled over
the other way
in bed

That night
I kept my dream
while people slept
I dreamt
ignoring
the day
come the
morning
the sun
stood still
of it’s own will
and I, falling

In hope for light
and life  
I dreamt this dream
and wept
a stream of sleep
while wailing  
many a day
in mourning  
I watched
my defeat to
keep the 
dawn of day
hiding away
dying

We walked together
till together walked away
We stopped the walking
and sat down to lay
wondering how
life is heavy this way
not to carry
together’s slack
and whether we could carry
together another day
if together
were to ever come back
to stay

For every drip that drops
theres a kiss on your lip
we can’t stop
the tick proceeds the tock,
on every clock

Little bits of bitterness
makes a mess of emptiness
The pleases of teases
satisfy our happiness
And all that it will leave us
is pure **** of nothingness

Other than that soft
sweet scent of sweetness
Where only you can meet this
going back to our first kiss
that I myself so miss

When I said I love you
I never considered the day you would part
You packed my soul in a suitcase
and locked the door of my heart

When I said I love you
I didn’t think by now you’d be gone
You filled my head with darkness
Left me in my head alone

When I said I love you
I never saw the day you'd leave me blind
You stole my sun in broad daylight
and turned the light off in my mind

That day,
when I turned
and saw your eyes,
the sun grew in size
That kiss
upon your lips
exploded the stars
into shimmering
ships
Sailing away
to where
the 14 moons
of Neptune
were due
to rise

“Why is your flute so tiny
and all?”,
said the Willow to the little boy
“Maybe cos my song
is low and light
and my fingers
are so small”

“Why’s your arms
so stretched up high”
asked the boy looking up
“Maybe to send your tune,
past clouds and sky,
that resonates from my stump”

So together it dawned
the day they joined
spreading  the sweetest sound
The one who sits small,
with one standing tall
Together, reached heaven
from the ground

Why can’t we build a tree house?
In our own backyard behind the sky
away from a wailing world
far from where we lay and die
Why can’t we build a tree house?
To house and hold our dreams
our pictures pitched on wooden planks
’we were once ere’ inscribed on beams
A heart etched in a tree stump
Below where our forbidden kisses are found
No one to discover our hidden bites
Unless we let the ladder down
Our insecurities were safe up here
while I sketched your naked skin
every curvature and crease of secrecy
You read your poetry and let me in
on our backs, we gazed at the night sky
we sipped wine or drank some tea
In silence we shared unspoken words
wondering if stars have a tree
And now often I wish upon a star
now your another’s spouse
…are you happy?

…or dreaming of the same star
with our own tree house?

The Big Bear and Little Mouse were what you call  ‘Best of Friends’.
When Little Mouse would trip, Big Bear would giggle, pick him up and gently place him back on track.

When Little Mouse would fall, Big Bear would laugh, carefully lift him up, dust him off, and patiently put him back on the path.

One day, Little Mouse got stuck trying to get some cheese. Big Bear, thought it was hilarious. He pulled him out. Licked his sore. Gave him a pat and set him down to eat.

Big Bear and Little Mouse were the best of friends. Till one day, Little Mouse was sick and tired of Big Bear always laughing at him.

And left.

There are those who know of pain
Often and always take time to heal

There are those with promise broken
Often and always need time to seal

Yet, there are those whose hearts forgive
Often and always will