The Covid here again, see
affecting both you and me
I think it will stay
and we all will pay

I'm not stable enough for love
I'm not kind enough for love
I'm not worthy enough for love
I'm not ready for love
Lord please save me
I don't feel human
I don't have strength
I don't belong
I don't want to live
I'm nothing but depressed
A lost case
A piece of work
A damaged ex
Will I ever turn my life around?
And see the world differently?
Like it's meant to be
Like I have a destiny
Like anyone wants me
To be here

They told me that it's all in my head
And they were right
It is all in my head...
And my heart
And my veins,
It's in my stomach
My arms and my legs
It's immobilizing my muscles
And deteriorating my skin
So yes- they were right
But they left a few things out
Not only is it in my head
It's now completely taken over every single part
That makes me
Me

This is Depression

sit

as I drink red wine
from a dusted bottle

stay

as I trace our initials in the sand
with a gnarled brach of an oak tree

taste

the oysters they harvested
in this cool, winter month

(it is November,
so it is safe to eat them...)  

and take me

from the white tipped waves,
down to the black oblivion
of the ocean floor

your Egyptian sheets,
a sail for a ship
that never got to see
a new sunrise

Just stop and take a second to enjoy it,
enjoy the rainy days for they are the best.
The rain just seems to wash away the day.
Making it all new, a fresh start of sorts.
Taking the bad away with just a swift.
O to sit back and see it all fall away.
With a warm drink and fuzzy socks all day.
To sit and watch it pour is what I want.

It hurts when its not supposed to
and becomes numb when its supposed to hurt.

what do you do
when neither life
nor death sound delicious?

i’ll swallow the void
and hope it eats me
from the inside out

She was like music,
and I longed to dance.

Her heart was the beat,
and I begged for the chance.

Her words were the vocals,
and I was put in a trance.

Her smile was the melody,
and I fell in love at first glance.