i was too close
and felt too much
a w a y
there is nothing left
I was back in my prison-- the four walls of my room.
Emotions were shooting like pistols.
My head is about to go boom.
I always asked myself why I loved you
Even though I was certain we won't last.
I have always wondered why we're breathing
Even though our heart would one day stop.
Maybe it's because life is still worth living
Even when we know death from the start.
Maybe because you're worth loving
Even when I know you won't love me back.
Our love was perfect
A story of fairytale.
A work of fiction.
Everyone was such a fool
They were easy to convince
But there was one that can't be wooed
That one person, it was me.
Despite the efforts of flushing away
All the memories I had of you
In my dreams you still haunt me—
Like a ghost— out of the blue.
Then when I woke the pain returned
As if all of it was only yesterday.
The memories I thought I burried,
Back on the ground they found their way.
Hours again of staring into nothingness
I felt my heart ripped apart.
Into my bed with steaming warmness
I cannot move on to a fresh start.
All the things that should feel natural
Suddenly felt like a work so hard
May it be breathing or blinking,
Even the beating of my heart.
All of it was because I once again dreamed of you
So believe me when I say...
It was never easy falling out of love for you.
In ending our lives
We will never know
Whatever there is
That lies before.
It is the dreams
Of heavens and skies.
It is the nightmares
That roams at night.
Brave are they
Who tried to seek
In the never ending sleep.
For all the days I wake
To the sun that sneaks a peek,
I tell myself to take a grip
Before the reality slips.