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Amanda Aug 2020
Change me
I don’t like it
Make it go away

Sculpt me better
Tear me apart
And sew a new frame

Pull out my dulled eyes
For ones full of light
I’m sick of theses dying eyes
The ones who couldn’t see the love
Who could only show distrust
So tear out my broken eyes
Please give me something new

Them cut off both my hands
Cause they’ve done nothing to be kept
They bruised my neck
And cut my skin
So why keep them around

And my mouth
My beautiful little mouth
Stayed quiet when I cried
When I wanted to scream
When I needed help
Smiling through pain
Laughing through hardship
Cut it off
Rip it
Shred it until it’s in a million pieces
Give me a new one

Melt my stomach
Burn it
Set it on fire until it’s nothing but ash
It’s endless cries of hunger
Ribs poking holes through the thin skin
I hate it
It’s ugly and disgusting

Chop off my feet
Endlessly walking in a circle
Never quite near freedom
Taking me closer and closer to death
Let them bleed out across the floor
Until all that’s left
Is a husk of skin and bones

Rip out my heart
The thing that made me cry
Tears flowing across the hall
Stab the thing that stopped
When she walked in the room
That stopped when she walked out the door

And my brain
I hate it the most
I wish I could smash it into a million pieces
Burn it to ash
Do a million things I couldn’t name
I would shout at the voices
Stop breaking me
Stop hurting me
Stop controlling me
Stop it before I go mad
Before I go crazy
Before I rip myself apart

Burn the rest of the body
The whole thing was just a mess
Imperfect
Ugly
Beyond repair
No one cares for that thing
Just throw it in the river already
Let sink to the bottom
And lay there for years
Because no want that thing
That ugly little husk
Amanda Aug 2020
If I am an angel as you say
Then you must be the sea
Filled with intriguing mystery
Puzzling intelect
And beautiful, flourishing life
Your mind is a map of colors
Of passion and dreams
Your secrets are dangerous
And your tales are pure beauty

You came crashing through hell
And saved me
From the grips of oblivion
You found me
When I couldn’t find myself

Your passion is stronger than hurricanes
Stopping for nothing
And no one
It’s something dangerous,
Yet gorgeous
It’s comfortable,
Yet intimidating
It’s your soul
It’s your heart
And it’s something so pure
It should be forever cherished

To me,
Everyone fits in a box
It may be my naivety
But to me, everyone has a place
A label
A cage

No label fits you
No cage can hold you
You are something new
Something unique
Something undiscovered
So different, yet somehow so perfect
An unsolved puzzle

My cage is small,
Cramped,
It smells of failure and hatred
It’s lonely,
Thousands of faces swarm by my cage
But no one stops to help
Or even sends a glance my way
So i’ve stopped trying to shout
To scream for help

I am *****
I am broken
Yet somehow you see an angel
The angel who fell from the sky
The angel who failed
Who ran from their only hope
Who crushed their own dreams
But somehow
You saw glowing imperfections

Late in the dark of night
I walk towards the sky
Listening to the stories
Each night is peaceful
The low hum of the wind
And the sweet whispers of the stars
Thousands of paths
But they all lead to the sky
To my beautiful paradise

When I saw you
I saw harmonious darkness
Not the cold dark that sends chills down your spine
But the warm and safe embrace of home
Of late nights and shining stars
Empty roads and rustling leaves
Late walks down warm beach sand
Water shining from the light of the stars
And peaceful silence
You are home

— The End —