Lost to a sea of confusion
No one knows how to float;
Sink;
Or swim
So where do they all go?.

As I read your letters
Laying softly in my bed
I hold a brand new gun
Straight to my head

This isn't a poem. Its just me ranting about my shity life. For all of those who dont want to here someone rant about there shity life, there is no one forcing you to read this.

So i'll start by saying that I hate my life. I want to have fun all the time but I cant. I'm to busy helpin my dad. Now what kid doesn't want to help out his old man. Me thats what ****** kid. Jut because I jump up and do something doesnt mean that you can ask me for anything and I'll do it. that not how it works. I'm an adult now and I dont have to tae you'r ****. But that's right I do have to take it. Why? because im a ******* and dont have anywhere else to go. So here I sleep on you couch and smoke **** and go to work. wake up and do it all over again. everyday. over and over. I hate this ****. my life **** bad enough with Her and all my stupid depression **** that I cant help and that you dont understand. I dont see how you can't tell that your own child is dying. I need to be free or go insane. You've seen me snap plenty of times. I just don't know what to do anymore. I just want my old life back. I want Her back. I want it all back. I want mom back. and miss I want her back too. I want my tree house we built. The jeep we always drove everywhere. The big house with room to spare not some little appartment under the place we work. I can't handle this ****. I'm ****** up I know but you dont have to tell me that. I know Im a ******* but whatever. I have some fuced up **** going on in my head and I don't know how to deal with it. If poeple knew what I thought I would be killed or something. arrested for sure maybe torcherd or some ****. Anyways hope all you readers did'nt mind that to much. I think I'm just gunna call it quits on life. I'm to tired to put on the fake smile. later guys

**** and mistakes
Go hand in hand.
Time seems fly
Like hour glass sand.

Tried to stop
Failed yet again.
So I sit in the tub
Twisting a bub .

I can see myself
Circling this drain.
Hiding from pain
With pure scream brain.

Been awake for days
Wasting my time.
****** up to forget
The troubles on my mind.

The haunting troubles
Are all self-inflicted.
Struggling to push through
Fully addicted.

I keep ******* up
But it won't be my fate.
I've become someone in not
Someone I hate.