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Lost in Thought Jan 2021
In this world
There are people who have never been allowed to
be themselves.
All through childhood they were expected to fit a mold
or else
They were expected to be perfect
or else
They were not allowed to be angry
or else
They were not allowed to be sad
or else
They were not allowed to feel
or else

Yet
They are adults now
still living with the fear of or else
and most aren't even aware of it

They fawn to be accepted
like a little kid wanting a parents approval

They freeze when scared
just like a little kid would

They fight when cornered
just like a little kid would

They run when overwhelmed
just like a little kid would

They have never had someone to teach them how to handle emotions

They have never had anyone they could trust

They don't know what it's like to be treated as an individual
They don't know how to be an individual

In this age, where people "care" about mental health
no one knows how to actually "care" about mental health

You don't need to do anything special
just let these people be the little kid they were never allowed to be

just let them have their emotions
and help them understand them

let them be angry, frustrated, or sad
and just ask "why".

No need to explain it to them
No need to fix it for them
just ask "why"
or shut up and listen

if it doesn't make sense
then it doesn't make sense

just let them feel it

they need to know its okay to express emotion
like a little kid.

Then when they get it out
let them

If they do something wrong,
let them know
and show them what it is like to be forgiven
or that guilt can haunt them

That guilt can manifest into a monster if the little kid doesn't know how to let it out.  

You need to remember these people were denied a childhood
they were never able to grow

Just give them a chance to catch up
before the monster takes over.

**** the monster, not the kid
Draft 1
Lost in Thought Dec 2020
Depression
You are special
You are the most powerful shield I have
You freeze time until I'm ready
You encase my heart in carbon
You protect me

You protected me from the chaos of my reality
when I was living it
You took the burden of what I could not handle
When I needed it
You supported me
When no one else would
You were my friend

This was six years ago
I have people that love me now
I found my tribe

You doubt my progress
You hold me back
You don't belong here anymore
It's time to move on

It's not you
It's me

I no longer need your help
I no longer need you to protect me
I no longer want your protection

I am ready
I am ready to face my demons
I am ready to feel my pain
I am ready to discover my emotions
I am ready to be sad
I am ready to be mad
I am ready to be happy

Depression
I love you
but we aren't meant to be

This is goodbye
Farewell
Depression
something different
Lost in Thought Nov 2020
I try to speak
I try to express myself
I try to be present

My words are silenced
My expressions are distorted
My mind is trapped

Locked away deep inside
Is me

Somewhere deep down I still exist
but to you
there exist only a shell

A shell to protect a child within
A shell to protect me from toxic love
A shell to protect me from love
A shell to protect me from love
wait...

I need love
work in progress. pointers appreciated
Lost in Thought Aug 2020
unoriginal
originality
in this orthogonal
organization
of ostracized optimists.
incomplete
Lost in Thought Sep 2016
The night sky is the darkest black
With only the specks of the tiniest stars
Just barely strong enough to shine,
Overwhelmed by the brightness of society,
Never able to show its true potential and beauty
Except when in solitude,
Far from civilization
Where it can't be muted
It shine with a meaningful brilliance
A brilliance that engulfs the
Landscape below
A brilliance that would mute
Society
Lost in Thought Dec 2015
The world of a lonely child,
Is a world of pain greater than any,

The child may seem happy,
That is only a face,
A masquerade of emotion to only blend in,
As the years fade and he becomes an alien among children

It is too late,

the loneliness that has lurked in the shadows
And blocked by imagination,
Has escaped,
And incased his heart in darkness,

It squeezed and turned,
Harder and harder,
With no escape,
The child suffers,

He may be kind,
He may be diligent,
He may be caring,

But he is marked by his loneliness,
A mark even greater than the scarlet letter,
A mark scarier than death,

No one would want to be his cure,
Because they are afraid of the mark,
Even though they are its weakness,

The child will grow evermore alienated,
Until he is incapable of blending,
And too reserved,
to reach out, anymore,

He is no longer a child,
But a fully grown adult,
Ready to leave and face the world,
Without a single person to call a friend,

Forever marked with loneliness,
He is cursed to be
Alone.
Lost in Thought Dec 2015
For those who have suffered
Through fire and snow
From words
From action
To complete nothingness to show
Take pride
Take comfort
For those who cannot see
The true beauty in chaos
Are those who have not suffered
Through fire and snow

— The End —