I can't do it she said.    
Her thoughts controlled  by fear and doubts.  A word of encouragement busted through giving solutions and strength. She overcame.

I have made many trips wandering far and wide.  I made it home.  Now that I have made my ending journey. A few words I leave you.
My body faded away. I went on to the glorious blue realm of heaven as the splendid fragrance of sage surrounded me.  Those that have gone on before waved me on with laughter and celebration. An angel so beautiful that words cannot explain opened his arms and invited me to make my final trip.
"Don't be sad, be happy for me."
For today I sit at Jesus feet.

My Spirit took flight with angel's breath
Like leaves in the fall that wain as the
new season comes.

I have reached my final home.
I will see you again when your season comes.
"Don't be sad. Be Happy for me."

You said "no way it can't be done"
you've never seen the power of one

When the fire was lit to drive me more
I called on God with all  that lay before

It started with a spark to get it going
They look and asked "what is she doing"

I did it for the one that needed a voice
The innocent one who they said had no choice.

They called  me stubborn and even a pain
I don't mind for  I'll do it again.

If only parents behaved the way they expect their children to act.

In a forest of grass
the tallest **** gives
shade to the smallest.

Even a **** is useful.

A familiar stranger
knocked on my door
and asked "Are you the one
I've known before?"

The face of this heart
It stared at me
Through my net of
pain and disharmony

I'm here it's me
I scream in despair
don't leave me
for I'm still in here.

Let me in she said
I am the one you knew
You see we have  
lots of work to do.

To fix the wounds
the tears and tatters
to rest and talk
Nothing else matters.

I relented with tears
admitting the pain
to grow and repair
So that I remain

Much time we spent
together you see
Getting to know each other
myself and me.

I'll never let
the world take away
Myself again
NOT TODAY!

Like a healed broken bone
I am stronger......

Never to be broken in
the same place again.


God is my healer.

My heart once full now an empty hole. It sneaks up on me...my eyes they run with tears to fill the crater that once was fill of.life and love for you.   My lips quiver,  my throat tightens and wails and moans take over,  erupting like volcanic lava, I can't hold back. I lie my head onto my bed and hug the pillow of folded shirts, I bury my face and take your smell into my lungs, to have you close for a moment, one more hug
; with my eyes closed. You are here.

A song, a photo a familiar smell
takes me on a trip along the trails
of my memories  that
are a blink in time.

The good and the tough times,
mingled together in a harmony
that forever plays in my mind.

I am content.

My sunny sky you brought to light with  A cuddle as you're by my side.  Kisses on my ear abide. You knew just when we were to go. As you'd run side to side and to and fro.   Now you are gone.  When i wake tomorrow  you wont be there to drop into my arms... for our own routine in the morning as we shared our stretces and  yawns.  There be no waiting for me at the door, no wont see you , just just an empty floor.  And momma will miss you on her chair keeping her company while I'm not there. I miss you.

Through broken lenses  I see the truth

The facts of life are no longer hidden.

Life no longer seen through

a Rose colored façade.

Free to grow.

"Ya'll" You ask,      "get it done?"                                                           ­       There is no "ya'll,                                                          ­                           for I am one.                                                             ­                            
 The other in ya'll is supposed to be.                                  
     someone else and not   Just me.                                                      In this life I've learned you see,                                                     many Willing people drop out                                                 
     leaving ya'll to be just me.                                                              ­     It's still to do and no one can see.                                                       I'll do it with my God and Me

My mind is content
  
……… then
……… memories are stirred

A familiar smell,

A song we sang,

and here I am missing You

Again.

You course through my veins and meet my head in disharmony.   Uninvited but tolerated . No longer reviled,   I speak to you from rehearsed scripts til you linger no more.

Impending death of my beautiful  summer as fall encroaches.  Leaves falling. Bare branches like twisted fingers, dry grass with the bald spots  showing soil -i grin and bear it.   I long for sunshine and rain. Oh summer I grieve and anxiously look forward to seeing you after spring next year.

You can't curse me,,
Oh No you can't,

I see when you try,
The spirits they rant,

Whatever you say,
Whatever you do,

Will returned back,
70 timed two.

In haste I give you the best
   A warning is presented

I give the benefit of reasoning
  You took advantage

I turn away
  Change your mind you beg

Not today I say
  Not today...