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LeavinaYeslek Apr 2018
To get over you I will get under a boy
A dark haired boy like you
He won't hurt me
Not like you
I won't let him inside of my soul
Just my body
My. *******. Body.

Dreams I can't control
I wake up needing you
Nightmares I can control
I lay awake wanting you
You hate me
Or pretend you do while you're under her tongue
Speaking of tongues
The dark haired boy like you loves my body
But in a way that makes me feel *****
*****. Trash. I am.

I let you go
Or so I thought
I tried to free myself from the hold you have on my heart and my mind
Only to end up tying the noose tighter
I'm familiar with the scars you leave upon my body
I look up
Waxing crescent
You were always cutting your finger nails
The dark haired boy like you becomes more and more like you as he fills me up with more than what I wanted from him
The clouds block my view of the fingernail in the sky
I waited
And I waited
Endured the wind
The cold
The air that smelled of your memory
But the moon never did come back
We were the moon
It. Never. Came. Back.
LeavinaYeslek Feb 2017
Beneath the flesh
Torn open
Ripped apart
I can be salvaged-but why?
Dark clouds
Dark skies
Dark heart
Heavy insides
Deny me
Look away-look away
Beneath the flesh
Torn open
Ripped apart
I can be salvaged-but why?
Candy coated lies
It's over
Beneath the flesh
Torn open
Ripped apart
I can be salvaged
*But why?
LeavinaYeslek Feb 2017
I was in love with a poet
At the tip of my lips - Like I had a choice
A choice to say no
A choice to say not this time
A choice to say never again

I was in love with a poet
Numbness swirling through my body - Like I did not want to feel
To feel the pressure
To feel the friction
To feel the hit of explosion

I was in love with a poet
Tickling my insides - Like I wasn't waiting
Waiting to take it to the next level
Waiting to completely submit
Waiting for the ******

I was in love with a poet
Scratching at my flesh - Like I had a chance
A chance to not be entered
A chance to pull away
A chance to say I will not swallow your pen anymore
LeavinaYeslek Feb 2017
She was the rotten, yet still sweet fruit I scorned upon with every pump of life through my being.

But how could I love so freely with a bruised heart?

Through trials, though I will not find a pure answer. Through memories faded, yet bright in my mind like the sun that mirrors from her placid eyes when she whispered:

You're all I need in this chapter, this story, this life.

The torn little girl inside of me aches for that. Tormenting my mind with flowers, kisses and dance.

With skin soft as silk beneath my sinful fingertips.

She breathes me in, not aware I am a danger to her lungs, her heart, and the darkness that will run through her veins only to tear each and every one of them open.
LeavinaYeslek Feb 2017
Enter my mind fellow wanderer
Crawl the mounds of endless banter
Defeat the vines of persuasive voices
Overcome the brick walls of not amounting to more
But there will always be something more to long for
We are never full
Enough is never enough
This is the combat between my walls
I am
Join me fellow wanderer
We are
Merely existing
In a non-existent form
LeavinaYeslek Feb 2017
Some days I can't
The way
Tears fall
Trace my lips
You are not the cause
With each kiss you have me wrapped around your finger
It's tightness that I want
Hold me - keep me
With you
Stuck like putty
I am your mold
You could shape me
But you choose not to

— The End —