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Jul 31 · 34
Thank you
Justin Jul 31
Thank you

You have more Skills
Than the professionals.
You’ve managed
To keep me alive.

All of the times I’ve felt alone.
All the times I’ve collapsed.
You tried to resuscitate
Me.

Since I’ve almost Died.
I felt every Significant,
Forceful breath.
Even though  
My lungs were
Filled with fluids,
From the ruptures.
You gave me
Air.

I’ve felt  Your strength,
Through The steps
Of Chest compressions.
As my bones began
To crack.

my soul Was fading
From the land
Of the living, And
I’ve seen you
Try everything
In Your power
To keep
My heart beating.

In my
Dying breath,
And with the
Final word that
I Can muster.
I thank you
Because
I’ve
Always wanted
To get a
Second chance.

And for you I promise
To Hold on. I will
Keep fighting
For you.
The blood
Has Started to flow.

Now it’s time
For you
To have faith In me
To pull through.
Jul 10 · 41
Tree
Justin Jul 10
Trees symbolize
Life.
From a vulnerable
Seed.
That has
To be protected.
Into a
Source of oxygen.
That gives
Life,
To others.
But now that I
Grew.
Like a tree
Standing firm
Against
The wind.
Trees symbolized
Death.
Wether I use my
Body as an
Ornament.
Or if
I stick my car
Against the
Bark
Like sap.
Trees symbolize
Death.
No wonder a trees
Silent.
No one can relate
To the pain
Required
To grow.
Trees symbolize
Me.
From a small
Child.
That grew
Into
A great man.
I too suffered
In the silence.
As I watched
My leaves fall.
I was dead.
But with
The help
Of the sun.
I started
To bare fruit.
And
Now others can
See
That I grew.
Jul 10 · 32
2 poles
Justin Jul 10
It’s like
Losing diamonds
While playing
Amongst the rocks.
Or maybe
It’s like
Being the
Villain,
And hero
In a story.
For sure it’s
Like
Being a human,
Who has to
Manage
The gravity
Of heaven
And hell.
No language
Can truly
Decipher
The code named
bipolar.
It’s too complex.
It doesn’t make sense.
Its a plethora
Of
Violent
Emotional
Contradictions.
You can’t fix me
Because
I’m not broken
I am
Just
Me
Now Let me
manage
This peaceful torment.
Because I can
See,
But still blind
To the fact
That 2poles
Can’t be controlled.
May 30 · 46
Bleed
Justin May 30
For years
I was emotionally
Bleeding out.
I was bleeding
On
Those who didn’t
Cut me.
The
Red river
Just kept on
Flowing. But
I tried to
Gasp
For air
In the silence.
The more I
Struggled
alone.
The more
I bled.
Smoking ,
Drinking
& ***,
Couldn’t
Bandage
The open wounds.
Nothing
I did for
Myself worked.
It started
To get
Cold.
I was losing
The only
Thing
Keeping me
Heated.
But I
Also
Felt
The warm
Embrace
Of the heavens.
As I drift in
And out of
Consciousness.
I sit and
Wonder
Will I
Be saved.
I was able to write this poem. I survived.
May 25 · 46
Star
Justin May 25
Night time
When I think
The most thoughts
When I crumble
It is when I sit
Alone  
In despair  
But night time
Is when
I see the moon
With millions
Of my brothers and sisters
Some dance
Some shoot
But they all have
The undeniable
gleam
That all stars
Possess
simply Dazzling
Stars are
Reminders
That even on the
Darkest nights
They will shed light
Apr 9 · 52
Strength
Justin Apr 9
If you don’t let your past die
It won’t let you live
Think too far ahead
into the future
You will vanish
from the present
No one will ever know
The violence it took
To become this
Gentle
Through all the pain
I felt homeless
Begging for change
The closer
I came to you
The further
I strayed from myself
Always looking for
More from people
But
I am that more
I’ve been searching
For myself
For so long
Idc if I’m labeled
As a sin
I’ll live
Life
For self
I’ll always
Remember
Strength isn’t
Measured
By the battles
I overcame
By myself
But instead
It’s a measure
Of how you choose
To love anyway

-things I wished I believe
Mar 10 · 43
What if
Justin Mar 10
The common theme
Of growing old isn’t
So common to me.
I want to live a short
Impactful life
And it’s frowned upon
I’m supposed to
Grow with the pain
Nurture it
And sustain a
“ stable life”
But what if my tale
Was meant to be short
What if my purpose
Was to touch many souls,
And be gone in an instant.
What if I was meant to be an angel
But I had to  heal
The wickedness first
What if my battle is over and I,
Earned my rights to the heavens.
That what if
Is still unknown.
It will only be answered
By god

Ps.
I plan to tell you if I rewrote my destiny  
                  Til we meet again
Feb 23 · 197
Words
Justin Feb 23
Sticks and stones
may break my bones
But words will never hurt me
Is what I would preach
to my inner child
But It was all a facade
As my heart drowned
In the venom of your words
The bruises
The scratches
The breaks
None of it hurt more then your words
Broken bones turn callus  
Scratches turn into scars
And bruises fade away
But your words
Stuck with me
More then things things
That are meant to actually hurt me
Feb 19 · 302
Name
Justin Feb 19
Your name is a pretty word with
A deep meaning
A word that everyone should know
But no one gets
But I do
To me
Your name
Is redamancy
Hearing your name
Is like the blissful
Rings of an “ I love you”
Your name
Is only a word
That may be
Lost in modern language
But Im so happy that
We had this
serendipitous encounter
If I never would have found
Your name
I would still be searching
in the darkness
Your name
A word
But to me it’s so much more
But the others
Your still waiting to be found
Feb 16 · 77
Spring
Justin Feb 16
in
An everlasting winter solstice
Soul freezing
Body shivering
With my blood turning into solids
As I wait for the warmth of spring
But it hadn’t come
3 months turned into 16 cold years
Just waiting for the death to be over
Each day I hoped I would
Experience the rebirth of spring
But it hadn’t come
All I’ve witnessed was the death of the planet
With a sea of endless white crystals
Born in April
But can’t seem to remember
The feelings of my birth season
I hoped I would get to see the love
Spring provides
And it finally came
It came in the form of you
I’ve finally got to feel spring
And it’s warmth
It’s love
And I finally felt alive
You managed to even show my dark side
The love it was secretly craving
It feels like I’m at home in my natural
Habitat of spring
Feb 7 · 504
Soul
Justin Feb 7
Your presence is
A present to the universe
Your more beautiful then life itself
How can you go unnoticed
Your existence is
Mans greatest gift
You are the manifestation
Of peace
Love
Prosperity
And healing
Nov 2021 · 46
Black ice
Justin Nov 2021
Black ice

It can’t be seen only felt
You won’t know it exist
Until you fall
You won’t feel pain
Until your already on the ground
Adding to the coldness
I was safe
I was warm
Until I took my first step
I slipped
Never knew I could fall so hard
On black ice
You aren’t here
But your presence is
And I slipped on black ice
Your my first step
The most painful
The most embarrassing
But I still managed to fall
**** I couldn’t stay on my feet
But I sure do feel the numbing sensation of the ice
How could I be so reckless
I’ve been surrounded
By black ice my whole life
How could I fall for you
My traumas
Bad ex’s
My deep self hatred
How could I fall for you
Once again
Nov 2021 · 56
Eternal
Justin Nov 2021
Eternal

It follows me every where I go
It feels like it never leaves my side
It is Killing me internally
For eternity pain will be wit me
After we have a fall out
my pain seems to run back
We have so much chemistry
I think pain is my soulmate
My pain is in love wit me
So obsessed
It won’t let me be free
I got used to the burning  
Now I am anemic
I’ve been freezing
My pain changes like the seasons
No like bipolar mood swings
Or does it change like water
I am at eternal war wit my pain
I’m in pain but don’t yell
No wonder it feels eternal
I’m fighting pain alone
Nov 2021 · 37
Tip toe
Justin Nov 2021
Tip toe around death
cause I heard heaven was one hell of a place
After every funeral
Life must go on
Ppl talk about time heals
What about the things time kills
Tiptoe around love
Cause I’ve always loved you more
Hearts don’t break even
I gave you your heart back
U gave me mine back in pieces
No you just shattered
More of the broken pieces
Gave you all my love
Invested so much now I got no heart left
Tip toe around happiness
Because of the things I’ve done
Regardless of my past
I hope you see my heart is pure
It was just tainted
Tip toe around you
Cause your unattainable
Felt like u was home
But Got evicted
Now I survive by my lonely
Went from love birds To strangers
It all happened overnight
All that is left is a distant memory
Tip toe around myself
Because I’m me
A hopeless romantic
With the strength of kings
Can heal others
But can’t heal self
No one really felt what I felt
That’s why I tip toe
Like a thief in the night
To sneak
And creep
Around the madness
Jul 2020 · 35
He
Justin Jul 2020
He
He’s the embodiment of glass
When he is confident he is bulletproof
When he’s insecure he is easily shattered
He can be his greatest ally  
But he can also be his own worst enemy
When he is strong he finishes first
when he doubts himself he finishes last
He doesn’t realize how much power he has
The influence he has on his own world and everything around him is prevalent
His presence is calm, stable and irreplaceable
when he steps in a room the atmosphere changes
He has the ability to attract others
He has the ability to lead others
He has the ability to influence the world
Although he may not love or believe in himself
He is reminded everyday how special he is by the people who love him
Once he fully believes in himself he will be the strength that he would greatly depend on
Just like earth he is vital to life
He is he

— The End —