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Sleep.
Sleep child,
til' the light overpowers the darkness inside,
where I secretly cried.
I secretly tried,
but no one would guess,
and I never put my cards face up.
You'll just tell me to shut up.
The things I used to patch up,
the cut and scratch up,
caused by the dull
of my pencil,
and my soul.
I fell,
but I dragged myself up again,
back into my daily skin,
and I'm that burden.
That one whose not fully there,
told by everyone, "you just don't care",
with a random shudder scare.
The words I despise you all think,
even the shrink,
and it drowns me to the sink.
I'm that disaster,
everyone's after,
maniacal laughter.
"Am I losing my mind?"
"Is this mind really mine?"
"Would dying be fine?"
I'm not so refined
I can see the things in perfect imagery,
things I don't want to see,
always worried everyone hates me.
I can see,
I'm not me,
I'm not even a somebody.
Maybe inside is some other ghost,
I'm the host,
at my death let's just have a toast.
Til' death do we part,
take it as a new start,
buy the roses to my grave from walmart.
I didn't think I mattered anyways,
sleeping through these pass-me-by days,
my mind playing simon says.
I always secretly try,
but I am still I,
and now simon says ".....goodbye."
Trying to convince my shadow,
I'm worth following.
A distant look in her eyes,
Stretching beyond the horizon.
A battle long fought,
In her dreams so surreal.
A thousand miles did she walk,
Before pausing to rest.
But the lights began to fade,
For it was time for her sunset.
i can never tell if i am more haunted by empty picture frames or the ashes of their contents
though she  walks  a beautiful  road
    that  is  not  all  there  is.

bathed in brilliance
    flowing through her  being  as  if  it
      were  in her veins.

courage surges from  every orifice:
       a  warrior,  underestimated,   unappreciated

   head  among the clouds
      sun kissed eyes   blind
to  the  adverse

        lips graced  with  a  wisdom  beyond  the  years
  worn
       refined
radiant patience brushed  over  her skin

so though she walks  with  flowers  in  her  hair
     beauty   is  not  all  there  is.
As much as I miss you, dear,
I cannot keep watering dead flowers,
Not even an IV can save them now.
Why I'm still trying is unclear,
But I've been giving CPR for hours,
Trying to save this somehow.

I cannot keep watering dead flowers.
I cannot keep tangling with powers
Way beyond my ken.
I cannot keep hoping for more.
I cannot keep fighting this war
And losing all over again.
The deeper you sink
The darker it gets.
Sunlight fades into nothing,
Sound becomes a dream.
The pressure, the weight
Will rise beyond belief.
People will forget you
And you will forget them.

So all I can say is swim,
Don't let yourself drown
Because it doesn't matter
If you're swimming or sinking,
Pain will find you either way.
And if you don't believe me,
Believe this. I've been there.

I've been at rock bottom,
I've been at sky high.
But no matter where I'm at,
Pain has this way of finding me.
I hurt right now
For things out of reach,
But I know how to control
How much pain controls me.
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