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I'd like to slip quietly away from Life;
Peacefully in my sleep would be best,
that's for sure.

No doctor pounding on my lifeless chest;
demanding of me an unwanted encore.

I seek no grand Finale.
I require no clamoring crowds.

No, for me, just a bare and empty stage,
with one less spear carrier among the  dramatist personae.
One not remembered once you turn the page.
An Actor files his DNR
 May 2018 Spencer Smith
Untitled
Walking outside in the winter
A snowflake falls from the sky
And lands in my palm
It slowly melts as snowflakes do
And I start thinking
Each snowflake is spectacular
And different in its own way
But their lives are so short
Maybe humans and snowflakes
Aren't so different after all
Humans are like snowflakes
 May 2018 Spencer Smith
Taylor
may 24, 2017
last suicide attempt
everyone blamed you
it was him
he hurt you
why do you even talk to him still?

you were never the reason
you broke up with me that night
and i snapped
the only thing that kept me happy
left
and i had
zero reason to
live

it was never your fault...
 May 2018 Spencer Smith
LS
when i was 7 i cracked my head open with glass
and blood covered my head
i didn't go to the hospital
i didn't even tell anyone

i never saw the glass really coming
it happened in just a split second
i hardly even felt it
it stung
but i was too worried about the glass
and how i was going to clean it
before my parents came home
my mom always liked to keep her house clean
so i had to pick it up

when i was 13
my best friend had her first heartbreak
i was doing homework
because i was so behind
but she called me crying
and asked if she could come over
i held her for two hours
while she sobbed into my sweatshirt
and when she left
i didn't even get a thank you

i try so hard to make everyone feel content and happy
then sit in my room
and wonder why i'm so sad
but it's because
all i do is bleed for people
and they never even hand me a bandaid
11:11. Gazing at the night sky, with nothing on my mind, except the thought of you and I.
Crickets chirping, sky clear. Why do I wish you were here?
Your deep eyes, your warm smile. God. Your laugh, it could stop the world for a while.
Hour by hour, time ticks away. Slowly the night, turns to day.
Dusk will arrive, and my head will still spin.
To love, or to not? That I ponder, as the crickets chirp, and my heart just can't win.
11:11, still I wish, your gaze, your eyes, even your kiss.
Falling for you, wasn't exactly the plan.
Please, I hope, your heart is where I land.
sky filled with diamonds, wishing on shooting stars.
It is now 11:12, the time of moving on...
Love with all your heart people. Wish upon stars. Dream as big as you can. Love is never the plan...
 May 2018 Spencer Smith
Katelynn
Someday you’ll love you.
From the sparkle in your eye,
To the pitch of your laugh,
Even the color of your hair.

You will love every part,
From every wrinkle,
To every crinkle,
Every part of you.

But they will try to tear you down,
To make you frown,
To make you think you’re not worth it.

But darling you listen to me.

From the way you walk,
To the way you talk,
You will be mocked,
But don’t you listen.

From your weight,
To your height,
You are all wonderful to me.

Maybe one day you’ll see,
The beauty I see.
The way you were made,
So beautifully.

But until then,
Do not forget,
On how true beauty,
Comes from within.
I hope one day that you love you the way you deserve. You are worth it ❤
 May 2018 Spencer Smith
Isla
glow
 May 2018 Spencer Smith
Isla
I'm still glowing
with the light
you instilled

a single flame in my heart
illuminating
the hollow that remains
where you used to be

wavering at times
but never ceasing
though the world threatens to ***** it out

and though you are gone
I still glow
for my grandma, who passed away when I was pretty young. Only now do I know the importance of what she was trying to teach me.
Some souls
Are kick-***
Unbreakable
And mighty
Others want sympathy
While cutting your psyche
Sometimes
It's the choice between
Unbreakable
And
Always broken
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