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Bella May 6
Would you like me better,
If I looked like you
If I talked like you
If I carried myself the same
Or would you like me better,
If I was invisible
So you wouldn't have to look at me
Or see me in the halls
Or have to hear my voice?
Would you like me better,
If I just no longer existed?
Bella Apr 29
You gave it all back.

Everything that I gave you.

Everything that meant something to us.

The memories remain though.

The smiles,the laughter.

Everything that went right.

Everything that was good.

Will remain.

To never forget.

You an I.

That's something you can't give back.
Bella Apr 24
It creeps up on my like a monster in the dead of night.

Sharp claws ready to puncture my skin.

Giant mouth ready to devour my soul.

Piercing eyes to see my every secret.

Ears to hear all of my fears.

It knows that I'm afraid.

It knows that I'm alone.

Vulnerable.

And it waits.

Until the tears start to flow and the sobs tear my throat.

And then it strikes.

Filling my head with lies it creates to make my head swim.

Telling me that I would be better off dead.

And worst of all,

I begin to believe it.

I begin to succumb to wanting to die.

And I let this monster take over my mind.

Until I only have one option.

Death.
Bella Apr 24
I'm leaving today
                                I'm not coming back
                                                                ­    I'm sorry it's so sudden
But I can't take it anymore
                                            Everyone tried to help
                                                                ­                  But nothing works
I can't tell my friends
                                   They worries too much
                                                                ­            And I love them too much
I can't tell my mom
                                 She'll lock me away
                                                            ­         As if I'm not already a prisoner
A prisoner in my own mind
                                              Locked away
                                                                       Where no one can find me
No one will ever understand
                                               How I feel
                                                                   Or what it takes out of me
I can't tell anyone
                              How many sleepless nights
                                                                             I've endured over the years
Or how many times
                                   I've cried in my room
                                                                        Not daring to make a sound
In fear someone will hear
                                           That they'll find out
                                                                             what I've been hiding
So goodbye
                         Because with some luck
                                                                   I wont be coming back.
Bella Mar 27
I know that I'm a disappointment.

I've only been told that half a million times.

It's a running joke within the family now.

I know that I get angry at you.

I know I fight with you.

I know I make things hard.

And as much as you don't think so,

I'm trying really hard.

I'm trying to be better.

I'm trying to better myself.

Get my grades up.

And fix myself for you.

But to you,

I'll always be a dissapointment.
Bella Mar 21
All
I gave my all to you

Everything I had

Even things that I didn't

You had everything

My heart

My love

My soul

My everything

And you took it...for granted

You fed me lies

About where you were

Who you were with

About who you were

You lied so casually

Almost like second nature

And the worst part

Is that I believed you.
Bella Mar 21
I've lied

To everyone

I told them all that I don't think like that anymore

That all those thoughts are gone

But they aren't

And if anything

They're getting stronger.
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