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Justine Feb 2018
i held my heart in my hand, as if touching it could seal the shattered pieces and warm all the parts you left cold.
Justine Jul 2019
I lay awake
in the cold of the night
wondering if you wake
at the same hour in fright

do you feel the loss?
the ghost of my embrace.
or am I the only one lost?
searching for remembrance.

I lay awake, shivering in the night, are you?
you used to grip me with all your might
now you hold another tight.
Justine Aug 2019
the greed of the world cause needs in the world.
some children are fed and clothed and others are left in the cold.
starving,
wandering,
searching,
working,
looking for something more,
never to know what God has in store
Justine Apr 2020
Everything that heals leaves a scar,
but even scars fade over time.
Your pain will too.
Justine Aug 2019
Will you hold me?
Will you pick up your phone at 2 am,
when I call because I am afraid to fall asleep?
Afraid of the terrors that lurk in my dreams,
Will you caress my flaws and find beauty in all the ugly things?
Will you grow with me and learn about all the hidden secrets of the world?
Will you call me your darling?
Will you be mine?
Will you hold me?
Justine Feb 2018
People say me and my sisters are so much alike,
And that's because we are made of the same blooming flowers,
We were grown in dry soil with no one to tend to us but ourselves and each other.
We learned long ago how to water ourselves and how to pluck the weeds out from around each other,
We are forever growing together pushing the others forward.
We rejoice in the rain,
And blow camly in the winds.
People say me and my sisters are so much alike,
And that's because we are the same blooming flowers
-we were homegrown
Justine Sep 2019
Can an hourglass be reversed?
Or are we trapped in the disaster adulthood has brought on?
Can life's words be rehearsed?
Or will we never perfect the moments we look on?

Is life supposed to be a heap of regrets?
How are we to cherish the things we bury deep, so deep we digress?
We can look someone in the eye and tell them we are fine but can we do the same to ourselves?
I
Justine Jul 2019
I
I feel no escape from the demons at war in my head,
I feel no escape from night terrors and teary blindness I awake in.
I feel nothing and everything all at once.

I am haunted grief, loneliness and anxiety,
I have watched roses wilt to ashes and ashes fade to nothingness
I have seen the flicker of passion dissipate between two people,
and ignite in other lovers.

I can hear the screams.
The screams that come from my lips as I hold the sharp shards of what was once me.
wounded I desperately try to scream to see if anyone will save me.

Days fade to months of isolation,  
loneliness grasps my soul like a hungry demon
pain throbs in my chest.

So badly do I wish the hourglass could be flipped.
So badly do I wish I could be carefree and childlike once again.
Those times have come and gone
and now it is just me.
#life #experience #pain
Justine Nov 2017
I did not leave you
like you were nothing.
Do not be mistaken.
I left you because the longer I stayed
the more I felt like nothing.
Justine Dec 2019
I'm stuck.
With all my old wounds still bleeding,
I don't know if its because I keep reopening them or if they will just never fully heal.
Justine Aug 2019
Do you care?
our mother has been dying for us
shes growing tired from our beatings
providing shelter and sustenance for us to learn and grow
we take and never give back

do you care?
our mother is falling apart,
the poisoned fumes and dark magic released by consumer greed and nasty business owners in suits?

we are able to small things to care for our mother,
but for most this is much too difficult
too difficult to separate the plastic from the cardboard
or using electric cars.
such simple things that could be done to save or mother,
allow our mother to care for our children and grandchildren

will you care when it is too late, is it too late? is there time now to make a change?
one influence can make a difference one life can make a change.
imagine what we could all do?
Justine Aug 2019
I awoke in the dead silence of the night
I was cold,
I rolled over searching for your warmth only you were not there.
I let out a startled cry
as I clutched my cracking heart.

I wilted with the flowers,
I became bitter and cold with the winter.
I matched the April showers behind the closed confines of my curtains,
when spring came I did not bloom
consumed with hot fury like the scorching summer sun
I fell apart.

then one morning I didn't wake up hoping to see you there,
I opened my curtains
I rejoiced with the flowers in the sun,
I hummed the melody of the birds
I swept up the old cracked pieces of myself left around the room.
I had not fixed my old self,
I had become a version of me without you.
Justine Nov 2017
I trail my fingers across you're burning skin
Writing poetry you and i can only understand
One day maybe you'll find this
Justine Nov 2017
You remind me of a grapefruit,
Sour, but still sweet
Justine Feb 2019
I find myself searching for something in others,
I do not know if it is approval, love or forgiveness.
I do not know if I am searching for virtue or if I am searching for him in everyone I meet.
so I wander in mindless curiosity,
searching for the answers to questions unknown.
Justine Nov 2017
You deceived me with your charming smile,
I mistook the devious glint in your eye for infatuation,
I ate up every promise of adventure.
I carved my marks into the plains of your back,
I soaked up every flavour your body had to offer with my lips.
I wrote you a thousand letters,
Then burned them hoping somehow the wind would give you my message.
I have  found a new lover, this will be my last letter to you.
Justine Apr 2020
Hollow empty and cold,
I am forsaken to pay the toll for a road that was not my own.
I am holding onto sanity by drowning in broken remedies
that just aid in my despair.
w
Justine Feb 2018
w
“I don't want you” I say looking into the mirror.
And I don't know if i'm saying it to myself,
Or the places you left yourself lingering on me.
Justine Jun 2019
We are all just starving souls,
Who wander beneath the setting sun,
Searching for love in dark holes,
Recreating the fables our minds have spun.

Praying, pleading on our knees,
Letting out unsettling screams,
Hoping someone will hear our pleas,
And keep us from bursting at our seams.

Once our journey has finally  begun,
It can never be left undone.
Previous lovers leave us shunned,
So we search for them in everyone.

We are all just looking to end our longing,
But instead of walking we’ve been left crawling.
Justine Aug 2020
Will I ever forgive the sins of my past,
and the sins of those around me, that left scars that will last?
Will I create something beautiful from the ugliness I now see?
will I ever set myself free?
will I continue to set a lonely path, covered for miles with broken glass reminiscing on the tragedies from my past?

— The End —