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Daniel Ruiz Sep 15
As a child, i use the fall down the stairs a lot, scratch that, i use to fall down a lot as a whole, walking from classroom through classroom,
getting out the car,  at my home, at the airport, at my dad's but everything seemed to fall apart there so i didn't give it any thought, it was like my coordination was obsessed with gravity, my skin happy to be feeling someone's else's embrace, even if it opened little waterfalls that smelled like pennies, people started calling me an attention seeker, i was , i used to tell stories for every little scar the concrete left for me, i got tired of people asking me and the only answer i had was "i tripped", one time i told the kids in my class room that i got a scar jumping out of a window and falling on a car, i got bullied for the rest of the school year.

i still didn't understand why my body was clearly tormenting me, i felt like i was caged, and i didn't have any control over what hurts me, only the words that come after.

should i try to make them laugh? should i cry at this wound that's clearly painful?

should i make a run for it? no, that'll give gravity another chance to caress my skin and drink from this fountain that from disgrace it's running.

running faster than my body hits the ground usually hand first, hands that don't scar anymore, there's no more vacant room.

I'm not proud of it, of falling, of being riddled with an endless love between my knees and the swift but stinging pain alcohol has brought into the mix.

Falling is such a profound word that i didn't know i was falling in love with you until your arms cushioned my fall

and from then on i knew falling wasn't a curse.
Daniel Ruiz Jul 23
shadows dancing on the corner street,
the mist billowing in behind them,
a tango of two,
where one is nonexistent.

mischievous moves as blue light bulbs
paint the scenery for the shadows to hook around the gutter,
the mist, as high as it can be right now.  

For both to just disappear as the sun rises for another morning,

nonexistent happiness follows the mist around along the day,
mist turns into clouds, clouds turn into rain, rain brings darkness.

Blue light bulbs turn on again,
the shadows dancing around the gutter,
alone this time.
Daniel Ruiz Jun 7
life is full of efforts




the effort to breathe,to walk, to think, to talk, to be.




Then you walked in.
Daniel Ruiz Jun 7
Let’s run from the inevitable ,
Let’s leave our city, and buy a hut, close to the edge of the world,
Closer to the lies than the truth,
Closer to the things that keeps us waiting for more than misery and a cloudy night sky.

Let’s escape,
The unexpected, the inescapable,
Let’s run away.

And if you ever leave me, my love,
The edge of the world will comfort me,
In the darkest of days,
On the unstable nights,
I’ll fall through mountain range, and waterfalls of despair,
Just to wake up by your side.
Just to fall back asleep to the rhythm and warmth of your breath.

let’s run away to the edge of the world, not to jump off, But for once Live.
  Mar 19 Daniel Ruiz
Lexie
The sun found you first today
I will find you soon
Soon enough
Daniel Ruiz Mar 15
I lay, in my room, feeling nostalgic, Feeling emotions i thought were long lost from times where, i didn't need to think about the gasoline tank walking out on me, and leaving me with a pile of metal to push.

I start to think to myself, will death be significant? will i give out in the middle of the street like the gasoline tank of a person who believes it'll last another day?

if i knew happiness would leave me hanging when i needed it the most, i wouldn't have presented myself those years ago, when i first met it, oblivious of how addicting it is.

And now I'm in rehab, laying on a mattress on top of metal bars, playing dead so my emotions leave me alone, and let me live a life on my own.

But i still open my eyes, let my breathing be visible through my chest, let my arms tremble in fear.

Because deep down,

I'm scared to let go.
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