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Daniel Ruiz Jul 2020
My chest
Spiraling out of control,
Surrounding my heart
with this nasty feeling
A feeling I though long forgotten.

And I stand here,
Physically standing,
Mentally laying
down in a fetal position,
Trying to withstand
This abusive parent
I call my mind.

Cold sweat
rolls down my face,
Like a river to
his way to the sea,
Embarking on a journey
He already embarked before.

And just like dejavú,
It keeps happening over and over again.
Something I had written on my notebook
Daniel Ruiz Jul 2020
“It’s raining outside”
I say as we lay on the bed,
You sleeping on my chest,
The sound of it hitting the ceiling,
The chills it brings with it,
And us just existing together,
Two people that
didn’t know truly
what love was
Loving each other,
Learning along the way.

the rain gets heavier,
I can feel the warmth
of your every breath
on my stomach
Letting me know that
We are both alive.

I fall asleep with you,
And when I wake up
Still drunk on love
You tell me

“It’s raining outside”
Haven’t written anything in a while, maybe I should get into it again
  Mar 2020 Daniel Ruiz
Elle Vee
She sips another cup,
to her it tasted like strawberry,
though bitter.
It was tea.

All she wanted was to dream,
to relax, be in peace.
A wish to float.
It was her reality.

But when she woke,
She felt chaotic,
Thoughts drowning her,
she wants another trip
Daniel Ruiz Sep 2019
As a child, i use the fall down the stairs a lot, scratch that, i use to fall down a lot as a whole, walking from classroom through classroom,
getting out the car,  at my home, at the airport, at my dad's but everything seemed to fall apart there so i didn't give it any thought, it was like my coordination was obsessed with gravity, my skin happy to be feeling someone's else's embrace, even if it opened little waterfalls that smelled like pennies, people started calling me an attention seeker, i was , i used to tell stories for every little scar the concrete left for me, i got tired of people asking me and the only answer i had was "i tripped", one time i told the kids in my class room that i got a scar jumping out of a window and falling on a car, i got bullied for the rest of the school year.

i still didn't understand why my body was clearly tormenting me, i felt like i was caged, and i didn't have any control over what hurts me, only the words that come after.

should i try to make them laugh? should i cry at this wound that's clearly painful?

should i make a run for it? no, that'll give gravity another chance to caress my skin and drink from this fountain that from disgrace it's running.

running faster than my body hits the ground usually hand first, hands that don't scar anymore, there's no more vacant room.

I'm not proud of it, of falling, of being riddled with an endless love between my knees and the swift but stinging pain alcohol has brought into the mix.

Falling is such a profound word that i didn't know i was falling in love with you until your arms cushioned my fall

and from then on i knew falling wasn't a curse.
Daniel Ruiz Jul 2019
shadows dancing on the corner street,
the mist billowing in behind them,
a tango of two,
where one is nonexistent.

mischievous moves as blue light bulbs
paint the scenery for the shadows to hook around the gutter,
the mist, as high as it can be right now.  

For both to just disappear as the sun rises for another morning,

nonexistent happiness follows the mist around along the day,
mist turns into clouds, clouds turn into rain, rain brings darkness.

Blue light bulbs turn on again,
the shadows dancing around the gutter,
alone this time.
Daniel Ruiz Jun 2019
life is full of efforts

the effort to breathe,to walk, to think, to talk, to be.

Then you walked in.
Daniel Ruiz Jun 2019
Let’s run from the inevitable ,
Let’s leave our city, and buy a hut, close to the edge of the world,
Closer to the lies than the truth,
Closer to the things that keeps us waiting for more than misery and a cloudy night sky.

Let’s escape,
The unexpected, the inescapable,
Let’s run away.

And if you ever leave me, my love,
The edge of the world will comfort me,
In the darkest of days,
On the unstable nights,
I’ll fall through mountain range, and waterfalls of despair,
Just to wake up by your side.
Just to fall back asleep to the rhythm and warmth of your breath.

let’s run away to the edge of the world, not to jump off, But for once Live.
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