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Jun 2020 · 203
Tonight
Jodey Ross Jun 2020
As I lay here, the two of you beside me, I feel at peace. And though I can't sleep with all of the thoughts running through my brain, I feel as if I don't even need to. You both give me the strength to keep going. I know that fights happen. I know that things get tough, and money gets tight, and days get tiresome, but I also know that I will always have a place to call home. A place where I can finally rest my eyes and collapse mindlessly into a warm embrace that will mend all of the wounds I may have had. I have never felt such love for anyone until I met you, Adam. I never thought I could feel safe to let my heart run to someone again until you beckoned it your way. And I know this all sounds stupid and maybe it's because I'm sleep deprived, but I want you to know that you mean the world to me. I love you with my whole being and I truly hope you can see that.
Nov 2016 · 2.1k
Into the Universe
Jodey Ross Nov 2016
Looking up at the universe makes me realize just how lucky I am to have you at the center of mine.
Oct 2016 · 489
I need to write this down
Jodey Ross Oct 2016
I don't know what else to do.
My grades are slipping,
I barely eat,
My anxiety is worse than it's ever been,
And my depression makes me barely able to function.
I don't want to tell anyone,
I don't want to be a bother.
I feel like I **** up everything I do,
I don't want people to worry about me anymore.
I'm not worth the time and effort,
All I am is a clingy ******* who makes everyone around me upset,
Why even bother being here anymore...
I'm sorry, guys.
Jul 2016 · 2.8k
Happy Birthday
Jodey Ross Jul 2016
Grandparents: "Happy birthday, sweetie!"

Aunt: "How does it feel to be old?"

Uncle: "Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you!"

Cousin: "Happy birthday! I love you!"

Girlfriend: "Have a very happy birthday, my love!"

Through all the enthusiasm and happy birthday wishes, I still feel an empty hole.

A depressive state that won't go away.

Five years...

Five years in a row...

My parents forgot my birthday...
I know this may not be a big deal to some but I am seventeen and I don't live with my parents. Today is my birthday and I have gotten calls from everyone else... But them...
Jodey Ross Jul 2016
Life has the tendency to push you down,
as if you wouldn't make a difference in it.

Life has the tendency to convince you of impossible thoughts,
as if you are worthless to it.

Life has the tendency to make you feel like you don't belong,
as if no one truly understands you in it.

What life doesn't do is show you how wonderful you truly are,
like rainfall in the desert.

What life doesn't do is make you realize that you are worth more than it can offer,
like food to a homeless man.

What life doesn't do is tell you how resilient you are,
like *flowers through the sidewalk cracks.
I feel inspiration is lacking in society these days. Have a little.
Jul 2016 · 809
Band-Aids
Jodey Ross Jul 2016
Some people in this world will hurt you;
others are band-aids that will help you heal.

You just have to figure out who is who.
Jul 2016 · 1.7k
Stye in my Eye
Jodey Ross Jul 2016
There once was a stye in my eye
I picked it off
and did not cry
Jodey Ross Jul 2016
As the little minds drift off to sleep with a strife,
the unsung heroes of the night come to life.
Protection from the succubus of the eventide,
using their powers of whim with a glide.
Stitched smiles and button eyes defend the adolescents
under the shine of crescents.
While the nightmares attempt to emerge,
the guardians uphold with a surge.
Unable to pirate their minds,
they dissipate with a wind.
The unsung heroes take their win with a fain,
therefore the children of the world are safe again.
A whimsical poem about teddy bears. I felt as if I didn't have enough fun poems in my book, so I wrote one.
Jul 2016 · 337
Never in my Life
Jodey Ross Jul 2016
Never in my life
did I ever believe
I would find someone like you.

Never in my life
did I ever believe
I would find someone to help me through
this hell hole of a life,
for you will always be the one.
I know this is a short one, but sometimes the short ones are the ones that speak the most.
Jul 2016 · 499
Writer's block
Jodey Ross Jul 2016
Writing down your thoughts,
feeling deep and personal,
rereading what you wrote,
and feeling like an ******.

Erase.

New introduction,
new formation of words,
unable to write them down correctly,
cursing into the empty room.

Erase.

Sitting with your arms crossed,
huffing as you readjust in your seat,
taking a calming breathe as you try again,
realizing that all of your efforts are futile.

**Give up.
Writer's block is the worst thing to have and I honestly just wrote down the last few things I did leading up to this and called it a poem. Have a good night, fellow writers.
Jul 2016 · 1.2k
PTSD Induced Coma
Jodey Ross Jul 2016
Sitting at the computer,
shaking as you try to drown it out.

Drown out the defining booms
that cause the entire second floor to shake.

Drown out the returning memories
that cause your head to throb.

Drown out the sobs coming from your mouth
that causes you to feel even more vulnerable.

Sitting at the computer,
shutting your eyes as you're bombarder with flashbacks.

The flashbacks of you being helpless
seem to never give you a break.

The flashbacks of no one coming to help
seem to give you the sense of worthlessness.

The flashbacks of him hurting you
seem to becoming more intense by the second.

Sitting at your computer,
wondering if you will ever be the same again.
The fourth of July is a hard "holiday" for me.
Jun 2015 · 1.3k
The World is a Puzzle
Jodey Ross Jun 2015
Going through this world, we feel like we don't belong, like we aren't supposed to be in this story, like you don't fit in. That's when you have to stop and think. You do belong here. You are a puzzle piece in this profundicate world. You may not fit in where you are but that just means you need to shift around until you do. I want you to think. If you look at a picture that has a white space, is it as beautiful as it could be? No. It's not. What I'm trying to say in the plethora of words is, a puzzle is not complete if it is missing a puzzle piece. This world needs you. Remember that.
You are worth it. Even if I don't know you and you're reading this I want you to know that YOU ARE WORTH THE WORLD!
Jun 2015 · 1.3k
If ever
Jodey Ross Jun 2015
If ever you need a shoulder to cry on,
I'm always here.
If ever you need someone to talk to,
I'm always here.
If ever you need to be proven how much you're loved,
I'm always here.
If ever you need to see a will to keep going,
I'm always here.
Going on a binge here. Whoops.
Jun 2015 · 829
I need you to know
Jodey Ross Jun 2015
I need you to know that I love you.
I love you more than anything in this entire world and always will, forever and always.

I need you to know that I'm never leaving unless you ask me to.
I will stay until the end of time, through thick and thin, forever and always.

I need you to know that you're my everything.
You are my moon, my light, my life, my air, my will, my fight, forever and always.

I need you to know that I will never hurt you.
The thought of you being hurt kills me and I could never ever do that to you, ever, forever and always.
No matter what my heart and soul will always be yours. Forever and always
Jun 2015 · 990
Promise me
Jodey Ross Jun 2015
Nothing is as scary as knowing that someone has your heart in the palm of their hands.

Nothing is as scary as knowing that with one simple clench of the first you will turn to dust.

Nothing is as scary as knowing that I'm nothing without you.

Nothing is as scary as the thought of you leaving me.

Promise you won't.

Promise you won't hurt me like the others.

Promise me you won't leave me here to rot in this world alone.

Promise me I can always wake up to the thought of you in my life.

Promise me.

Please.
Jun 2015 · 1.7k
I look at you
Jodey Ross Jun 2015
I look at you and I see beauty.
The way you look so peaceful as you sleep is simply breathtaking.
The way you smile makes me get that cliche fuzzy feeling in my chest and tummy.
The way you laugh gives me a reason to smile.

I look at you and I see a goofball.
The way you get so serious when you're playing Skyrim is simply priceless.
The way you "dance with me" makes me want to be dancing at our wedding.
The way you make a **** noise with your mouth every time you mess up when you're trying to be serious gives me the giggles.

I look at you and I see a lover.
The way you kiss me is simply exhilarating.
The way you want me makes me shiver.
The way you say you love me gives me butterflies and goosies to this very day.

I look at you and I see a fighter.
The way you keep strong is simply inspiring.
The way you still give me everything I could ever ask for even though you are going through so much makes me want to give you everything I have and more.
The way you kick depressions *** every chance you get gives me aspirations.

I look at you and I see my wifey.
The way you hold me is simply heart-stopping.
The way your body fits perfectly with mine makes me realize we are made for each other.
The way you are always there for me gives me a reason to live.
So, it is two thirty in the morning, I have written three versions of this before I finalized it, and it is finally finished. I could not for the life of me sleep because a certain someone, *cough cough* Stephanie, was running through my head so I decided to write about her. Hope you enjoy it, my love. :*
Jun 2015 · 9.1k
Pain
Jodey Ross Jun 2015
Pain is your friend.

Pain tells you when you've been wounded badly.

But you know the best part about pain?

It tells you you're not DEAD YET.
May 2015 · 3.1k
Jump
Jodey Ross May 2015
Jump...
Jump, jump, jump...
Jump, jump, jump, jump, jump...
Jump, jump...
Jump, jump...
Gets hit by car.............
Restarts...
For the hundredth time....
Jump...
Jump, jump, jump...
Jump, jump, jump, jump, jump...
Jump, jump...
Jump, jump...
Falls in river..............
Restarts.....
For the hundredth and one time....
Changes character....
Chicken...
Frog...
Unihorse...
Alien...
Dark Lord...
Flea...
Celebrity...
Turtle...
Nothing wins...
I try...
Over and over and over again...
And I can never beat Crossy Road!
...
...
...
...
...
Restart...
Crossy Road... My new addiction.
May 2015 · 807
You have my heart
Jodey Ross May 2015
You have my heart,
and every bit of love I have,
to hold and keep forever.
You have my soul,
and ever bit of life I have,
to hold and keep forever.
You have my smile,
and every bit of laughter I have,
to hold and keep forever.
You have my eyes,
and every bit of light I have,
to hold and keep forever.
You have my mind,
and every bit of hope I have,
to hold and keep forever.
You have my body,
and every bit of lust I have,
to hold and keep forever.
You have me,
and every bit of everything I have,
to hold and keep forever.
Forever and always, my love.
May 2015 · 779
As I lay here
Jodey Ross May 2015
As I lay here,
feeling the indent in the bed next to me, I close my eyes.
Enjoying the feeling of closeness. Enjoying the feeling of safety.
As I lay here,
thoughts stirring in my head,
ones that I shouldn't be having,
I know I am safe.
I know you will never leave me like so many have before.
As I lay here,
submerged in the cold air of the room,
I hope you can see my love for you.
Feel my love for you.
Feel my love so strongly that you know it is true.
As I lay here,
half under the golden blankets,
I need you even more.
Need the touch of your skin.
Need the feeling of your warmth.
As I lay here,
wearing the clothes I went to bed in,
I love you even more.
Even more than ever thought possible.
Even more than you could ever imagine.
I love you, Stephanie. Forever and always. :*
Dec 2014 · 3.1k
Christmas
Jodey Ross Dec 2014
Chris
tmas Christ
mas Christmas
Christmas Christmas
Christmas Christmas Chris
tmas Christmas Christmas Christ
mas Christmas Christmas Christmas
Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas
Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christ
mas chris
tmas Chri
stmas tree
HAPPY CHRISTMAS!!!! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!
Dec 2014 · 638
Society says
Jodey Ross Dec 2014
In a world where society says you need to be thin,
beautiful, and smart, funny yet sophisticated. In a work where you are to be yourself. Except you can't do that. Oh sorry, no, you can't do that either. In a world where you need to be unique but can't stand out of the crowd or you get patronized. "How are we supposed to go on in our lives being all those contradicting things?" you may ask yourself. Well, I have a solution. It is quite simple actually. You do you and don't listen to what society has to say. You be the perfect person you are in this beautiful world. You let NO ONE tell you who you should be, because you are amazing. You don't have to be skinny and tall. You don't need to be charismatic and sarcastic all at the same time. You don't need to worry about what people are going to say about you. If you want to wear that sweater covered in cats you ******* rock that sweater covered in cats! You could be a plump Hobbit and you would still be perfect because you are you, and you are amazing. Don't let anybody ever tell you otherwise.
Oct 2014 · 3.2k
Cats
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
Ca                  ts
CATS               Cats
Cats Cats Cats Cats
Cats Cats CATS Cats Cats
Cats CATS Cats Cats Cats Cats
Cats Cats Cats CATS Cats Cats
Cats Cats Cats Cats Cats
Cats CATS Cats
Cats CATS
I love cats
Oct 2014 · 341
Ripped
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
RIPPED

TORN

The blade sliding across my fragile skin.

A rush of adrenaline pushes its way through my body.

Blood drips from my arm.

Finally,

Relief.
Oct 2014 · 18.1k
Respect
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
The best respect to have
is respect for yourself.
I need to try to remember this, I have a bad habit of forgetting I'm a person.
Oct 2014 · 761
Peeling paint
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
Trees and vines invade through busted windows.
Layers of dust preserving abandoned old toys.
Water swollen floors from holes in the battered roof.
Mold has tattooed the ceiling forever.
Peeling paint falls off with a single kiss of the wind.
As you sit there and ponder on what happened,
the ghosts of the dead wonder.
This is one of my personal new favourites. I tried to use imagery and a I hope it worked.
Oct 2014 · 1.2k
Sublimation
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
My mind has been on a roller coaster of sublimation.
Turning to mush as I get called crazy.
Not doing any thing about it because I'm, quote, lazy.
Wishing I could turn back time.
Wishing they weren't so sublime.
Now I'm all alone in the nation.
Nothing left but sublimation.
Oct 2014 · 283
Three
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
Stephanie,
You are so amazing.
You're beautiful and talented
and good luck with taming
the love in my heart.
For it is only just the start,
of how long you will have to deal with me saying
those three little words.
That aren't that little at all.
Three words that get
taken advantage of by others.
Though I'll never find another
person to say this to with so much meaning.
Knowing I will never plan on leaving.
I love you, Stephanie.
Forever and always.
The three words are forever and always, not I love you. Some people got confused.
Oct 2014 · 555
Komodo Dragon
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
Your bites are like venom coursing through my veins.
Causing me to loss my strength.
I collapse to my knees.
Beg and plead
for you to stop the pain.
Why must you do this to me?
Make me weak and helpless?
Why must you do this?
I ask,
taking my last dying breath.
Oct 2014 · 674
Angel Of Death
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
Lying in the dark.
Waiting for his prey.
The Angel of Death
waits to make your day.

Stealing away your soul,
never to be told,
of how you lost your life.
Nothing will suffice.

Lying in the dark.
Waiting for his prey.
The Angel of Death
waits to make your day.

Black robes to hide his face.
You had better quicken your pace.
Skull scythe to steal your spirit.
Your screams, the world won't hear it.

Lying in the dark.
Waiting for his prey.
The Angel of Death
waits to make your day.

There is no where to hide.
He'll take you for a ride.
Into the pits of Hell.
Locked inside a cell.

Lying in the dark.
Waiting for his prey.
The Angel of Death
waits to make your day.
Oct 2014 · 301
I need your presence...
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
Clouds as dark as coal,
night is like my soul.
Creeping through the dark,
hoping to make a spark.
I try to shut them out,
now I'm having my doubts.
If I can make it through,
being unable to see you.
Oct 2014 · 1.2k
*Not a poem*
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
I would just like to announce that today I am officially two hundred days clean from cutting! :D
Oct 2014 · 715
I want you.
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
I want to hold you.
I want to touch you.
I want to love you.
I want you.

I want you to want to hold me.
I want you to want to touch me.
I want you to want to love me.
I want you to want me.

I want to feel your breath against my neck.
I want to feel your heart beat with mine.
I want to feel your hands caress my body
.
I want to feel you.

I want you to want to feel my *breath against your neck
.
I want you to want to feel my heart beat with yours.
I want you to want to feel my hands caress your body.
I want you to want to feel me.
Oct 2014 · 5.2k
No matter
Jodey Ross Oct 2014
No matter if it's dark and gray,
you always seem to brighten my day.

I think about you all the time,
how your eyes always seem to shine.

Always there for me to talk to,
I know I can always count on you.

Laying next to you in bed,
not wanting anywhere to be instead.

Think about your kisses makes me swoon,
knowing I will get to have them soon.

I love you more than anything ever
and me stopping would be never.
Sometimes I get sappy and want to write about my love. Sorry if it gets annoying...
Sep 2014 · 4.1k
Suspense
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
The suspense is killing me,
making me itch!

Thinking of what it could be,
I think I'm going mad!

Just one little word,
that's all I need!

Just one little word!

Give me a hint,
I need it *please!
My girlfriend has a surprise for me this weekend and won't give me a hint and I don't go to school with anyone that she told what it was and it is killing me!
Sep 2014 · 2.4k
Another sappy poem
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
I think of you and smile.

I never want to look away.

Your light will shine for miles.

I hope you really want to stay.
Sep 2014 · 1.7k
Butterflies
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
Every                  time                   I think
about you              I get               this funny
feeling in  the           pit           of my tummy.
It is not a bad feeling, no. It feel is like
tiny flutters of butterfly wings are
grazing against the inside of my
belly, causing me to blush and turn
hot from the bright red on my cheeks.
You amaze           me to        no end, love
Every time it          happens              it reminds
me of how                    much                    I love you.

Giving me butterflies.
Sep 2014 · 607
Drip
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
Drip.
Drip. Drip.
I miss the feeling
of the blood dripping
off of my skin. The red color
of the delicious blood. I miss it so
much. It makes me want to do it again.
Thinking about it like this, I remember all the
lonely nights I lay on my tile bathroom floor.
Listening to the drip, drip, drip. Wanting to
finally feel again... Not wanting to be alone
anymore. Wishing someone would come
ask me if I'm okay. Show that they
actually do care for me...
Sep 2014 · 443
Written by my sister, Julie
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
You are worth galaxies,
the stars,
the sun.

You are worth laughter,
happiness,
and fun.

I wish you
could just see.

Just see,
how much you
mean to me.

Then you'll understand,
what I mean
when I say,

You are worth galaxies,
the stars,
the Sun.

You are worth laughter,
happiness,
and fun.
Sep 2014 · 587
How is she different?
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
This always happens...
She gets away with everything and I with nothing.
I don't understand?
She could stab a man five times and not get in trouble,
but if I were to do that it would be a death wish?
How is she any different than me?
My sister gets on my nerves sometimes...
Sep 2014 · 262
The mind is decieving.
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
I sit here and stare at the blank wall in the dark,
as my mind whirls with imagination.
I see shadows,
tricks of the mind,
people in the darkness.
I know they're not real,
but I feel as if I could touch them,
reach out and feel them brush against my fingers.
Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I tried.
Would I really feel someone there,
or would my fingers glide through the empty air to nothing?
Sep 2014 · 586
To my love
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
Looking at your beautiful face,
I never knew I could fall so hard.
Never knew I could possibly love someone so much.
My love for you burns brighter than all of the stars combined.
My love for you will never end.
Even if you stop loving me, I shall not.
I will go to the end of the universe for you and always will.
Forever and always, my love.
I dedicate this poem to my amazing fiancé. I love you, Stephanie. Forever and always. :*
Sep 2014 · 376
I miss it
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
I miss it...

I miss the feeling of it.

The blade sliding across my skin.

Seeing the red against my pale skin.

The release I get from it.

I miss it more than anything.

Please give me strength to not.
Sep 2014 · 189
Pain
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
People don't understand how hard it is.

Although I try to explain.

I just can't seem to reach them.

Nothing left but pain.
Sep 2014 · 275
Empty
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
Fading away.
My soul leaves.
Making me an empty shell of my former self.
Sep 2014 · 202
I wish...
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
I wish I
could tell
them the
things I
see.

I wish
they could
feel my
pain.

I wish
they'd accept
me for who
I am.

Not having
new traits
to gain.
Sep 2014 · 170
Falling
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
F
   A
       L
           L
             I
               N
                    G

D
    R
       O
           W
               N
                   I
                      N
                          G

I don't know
how to

S W I M

I only know
how to

S I N K
Sep 2014 · 675
Trapped
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
Trapped inside stone white walls.
No windows.
No doors.
Alone in my thoughts.
Going insane.
I have no escape.
Leaving is not an option.
Sep 2014 · 194
If they did.
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
They don't understand.
They say they do but I can see the lie.
I know they don't.
If they did it would be okay when I scream at the voices in my head.
If they did they would understand why I don't want to see family.
If they did they wouldn't punish me because I stick to myself.
If they did they wouldn't scream at me for doing things I don't remember doing.
If they did I wouldn't be alone.
Sep 2014 · 180
Which path do I choose?
Jodey Ross Sep 2014
Walking alone I come
to a fork in the road.
Which path do I choose?

The left road is a dangerous                                                    
path. My demons call to me.                                                
Beg me to play.                                                                          

                                                      The right road is full
                                               of light. Life.  My family
                                              wants me to come home.

They fight over me. I
don't know what to
do. I love my family.
I want to choose them,
but I can't... I choose
the left path.

I
             spiral
                      down.
                         What
                            have          
              I
        become?
I'm
a.    
monster...          
At.      
    least
       I
              won't
    have
to  
worry    
for  
l
o
n
g.
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