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I do not beg for forgiveness
I know you are better than that,
I work instead
To help or try to understand,
And wish that my little outbursts
Don’t cause much damage
Please treat me then, like a child,
For I have yet to learn
To not be as wild;
I mean not to scare,
Can I hope
Would I dare?
Apology ©️2020 Jana Pelzom
There are so many shades of everything, it’s a wonder.
Jana Pelzom Oct 21
My mother, she
Knows more than me,
Though she, like anybody,
Has her own insecurities;
That she doesn’t have a degree;
But she’s been teaching me
Twenty twos years and 5 months,
My sister 5 more years;
She’s been teaching longer than  
most of my buddies;
It’s even worse
For she can’t just fail;
Give F’s and maybe a retrial
My mother,
I tell you she,
Deserves an honorary college degree
For though she says I now know more than her
She was the one helping me through
my cries and utter misery.
It is unfair how the world at large
Took away your student at heart
But I need to apologize
For that in turn
Helped me realise how to learn.
My Mom © 2020 Jana Pelzom
Dedicated to my mother for all she has been through for me. Not everyone gets as lucky but I hope some end up being the lucky strike for other children instead.
Jana Pelzom Oct 21
Know more than Heaven,
Shut Hell with your mouth,
Take this world
And let it lament,
love so much
it hurts,
So I hate instead
And it gets worse,
They tell me I look the type
So I don’t smoke cigarettes;
I’ve resolved to
Being in just passing,
This life maybe
Or may not be;
there’s no middle ground,
We’re all just tumbling around,
So shut Hell up
And hope you know more than Heaven
And as you leave this world,
Leave a trailing presence;
A goodbye filled with laughter,
An everlasting song.
Know more than Heaven ©️2020 Jana Pelzom
Jana Pelzom Oct 21
The music of life it flows,
In every heavy breath,
And every low blow,
It sings in high falsettos
I cry,
I rage,
I hold myself and try to sallow
That I have no control
Over how the concert unfolds;
The screams,
And beats
of feet on the ground,
And everyone marches
Or falls down;
Sorrows aren’t arrows,
We’re not bows,
Yet taunt we are
And deal out our blows;
If I let go
It hurts another,
But year in and year out
I end up pulling the string,
And then I hear someone sing
“What an up strung girl”
The chorus of the cacophony,
Then the ****** of the dischord,
An arrow singes through the atmosphere.
I do not know what to do with emotions. I end up being quite high strung and do things on impulse but I do not know any other way to deal with them except to feel it as it is but everyone tells me to mellow out. I do not seem to know where to start. And sometimes I feel it is wrong to feel anything at all and other times feeling is all that is fun about this world.
Sharps and Flats ©️ 2020 Jana Pelzom
Jana Pelzom Oct 12
what cheap words
I think as I write
There's no flowers blooming here
I have no choice but to pretend
the garland on my crown
Is fresh with buzzing bees
but come, you and I both know
this is what comes with modernity;
nature is what once magic used to be
Changes ©️ 2020 Jana Pelzom
Jana Pelzom Oct 5
Sadness filled me with every line
Blinded, choked and not in time
Dor (n.) ©️ 2020 Jana Pelzom
“Dor (Romanian) a deep and nostalgic feeling of sadness, agony and emptiness one experiences upon intensely missing, longing, and yearning for something or someone.”
I once found this word and thought it was interesting
Jana Pelzom Sep 18
Today was my graduation
There’s one every school year
The money spent
On knowledge
Where they tell me
Money can’t buy wisdom  
Contrary
Then  tell us all
No graduation this fall
We’ve all been given digital passes
To go work in
Maybe a mall
They tell me I’m too caught up
My heads way up in the clouds
And then they give me
a virtual Hat toss
Hurrah to our 2020 graduates
Bless us all.
Class of 2020 ©️2020 Jana Pelzom
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