Subjectivity of the eyes,
Transverse the sea,
To see the world's vice,
Drowning in a sea of lies,
We dream of locks and keys.
Keep to yourself and lie -
- down on roses of red and white,
With scents and fragrance,
So alluring, sweet, and suffocating.
Of roses so white become red,
From wounds of the past -
Of vacant, empty, fragile dreams,
Of hope, love, lies and deceit.
As I try to walk this path of dread,
I face myself in dreary despair.
A loss of hope is but my demise,
Wobbling through this life so divine,
To be free and caged is but a reality,
As we dance in this cage of futility.
We dream, and dream, then hope,
Only to wake up and stay awoke.
I flee in fear as the enemy grows near,
I stumbled as a bullet passes my ear.
I stand, I turn running away with a tear,
I fall down as if I was hit with a spear.
I took on this war a long time ago,
With myself I had hoped that I could grow.
I lay down beginning to rot away,
The hours passed as I begin to fade.
I wake up and I see these wounds of mine,
Glowing as if I was filled with such life.
Slowly my wounds begin to heal and fade,
And such I begin to fight another day.
Never did I knew that that day drew near,
As I remember those days fleeing in fear.
Now I stand and fight my demonic night,
And I shall die with my tears shining bright.
I lay in this self-made grave from a self-made war,
Yet again my heart glows as if being revived.
I faced myself and gave myself a scar.
Yet it was healed by an angel from afar.
I want to burn into crumbs like the wilting candle that I am
I want to be cremated and my abject ashes sprinkled around the vibrant green mountains I saw in Scotland
I want to die as soon as possible by natural forces and become one with nature like the insignificant grains of sand
Because if death takes too long, I'll have to do it myself.