Laying down,
On this ground...
Why do i feel my heart burning,
Why do i feel my skin peeling of,
Why do i feel like my wings are comming off.

I rember you,
How hatefull i was of you,
Why are you back..
I cant kill you..
I cant stand next to you..
Just the hate and heat that you let off,
Make me someone else,
Id rathter not be anymore.

No matter how much i try its never enough..
Always comming back when i am weak,
And now you are here,


I need my heart to heal,
I need my head to be calm,
I need my pulse to drop,
I need this all to stay sain.

I am again confronted with you,


As much as you are appart of me,
Your not welcome,
You make my life harder,
You make me less of me,
You are a heathen that just,
Takes me appart,
Makes me an empty shell.


Still burning,
Still hurting,
Still breathing heat...

Only question?

Who understads the pain,
The loneliness,
The sence of being undone.

I am forever confronted with this fire inside.
Burning from the inside out,
Till there is nothing left.

I can only say, if you understand this pain.
Then you know why i wrote this.
I wont ask, to follow.
I wont ask, to stay.
I wont ask, to hold.
I may not ask to breath,
For all that i am.

I am a sinner,
A hater,
A human,
A body of flesh and bone.

For all that i am,
Is incomplete,
A dark hole,
Of nothing but,

I wont ask...

To make me whole,
To see my words,
Read my words,
Of sorrow,

I wont ask...

To see me as i am.

A human.

I wont ask....
Its hard to be understood, its hard to say how and what you are.
He gave me strength,
He gave me might,
He gave me freedom,

How i didn't listen,
How i didn't follow,
How i failed,

Still forgiven,
Still saved,
Still living to make amends,
Still breathing to follow,

O how i was so wrong,
O how i was so blind,
The Lord forsake my soul...

A bleeding heart could only,
Mend for all the love that was and still,
Its getting.

He gave me,
Sometimes you take Gods Words for granted and at the end of the day you
see his light.
Tears of a sad man,
How i sit here crying, never ending in my pain.
Always wondering why?
Why am i so different.
Why cant i be normal.
Normal such a strong word,
In the eyes of a simple person,
Such a death sentence in the eyes of an

How i try so hard to be normal.
How hard i try to see past my faulths.

To see pass my inability to change, this wrecked form.

How i cry here wondering, again,

God give me strength to pass this pain,
This broken piece of soul,
Mend it back.

Tears of a sad man is forever lost...

How they fall down this wreched face,
Displaced and never seen.

How my soul bleeds, craving for a want, craving for a need.

When will my soul be free...

Its about me, how i strugle with everyday life
Ever wonder why, when you cry,
Something dies?
Ever wonder why, when you cry,
Something ends in side you.
Ever wonder why, when you cry,
You get numb.

I always wonder, why the stinch off death
Wavers over my heart, when i cry.
And that is why i wonder why it dies, ends and i feel numb.

Knowing very well i am, my own judge
And executoner.
How i sit here wondering why?
How i sit here wondering when?
Will this all end...
A dark place where you wish, you were dead.
An open hole in your heart,
that is not getting filled up.
Just hurting,
Just bleeding,
Just there with nothing to fill it with.
How i wonder when, my time will come,
How i wonder why it cant come now.
A sad state of mind,
where no wall i climb leads to an exit.
Where no path leads to a success.

Dark place where, your mind is a maze
To which there is no escape...
i was feeling pretty worn out and pretty much lost, i bundled  all my thoughts and just started writing.
My guild is my own, and for that i must atone.
For no man or woman can heal the wounds inflicted on ones own.

I accepted my demise and so prayed to the Lord, as we all would do when faith is the only thing holding us ,through and tbrough, to this crooked world we see as our own.
We could never dispell the sins we have commited, for my self am a sinners who is now commited to guild and sorrow, on my own...

I long for the days to end and bring me a better tomorrow, and now i sit here and cry, wondering why my life felt so empty, it was i myself who dug my own hole, and pushed my self in to the cold, never to get hurt again, not knowing the pain that soon would follow and now i am here in this pit,
Of my own guild and sorrow.....
i was feeling a bit down so i wrote from what my heart was feeling.

— The End —