Olivia Struthers

Olivia Struthers Jun 2015

3 Words

And I'm sick of those
Stupid 3 words
"It gets better"
Because I don't care
If it does someday
It's not right now
And I need it to be.

Olivia Struthers Jun 2015

I Know Now

You yelled about my grades.
My fresh cuts,
My sleep schedule.
My eating habits and my
Mood.
But never once have you asked
Me.
Why,
My grades are slipping.
And you never asked
Why,
I took the blade to my skin.
I used to think it was because
You didn't care.
But now I know,
It's because you didn't want to hear me say,
It's your fault.

#sad #depression #thoughts

Olivia Struthers Jun 2015

You're Stuck

Let's face it.
You did steal me.
But you saved my life
Too. And somewhere in the middle
You showed me a place
So different and beautiful.
I can never get it out
Of my mind.
And I can't get you out
Of there either.
You're stuck in my brain
Like my own blood vessels.

#depression #missingyou #lovesucks

Olivia Struthers Jun 2015

I'm Done

My bones are dry out of
Fake smiles.
I have nothing left
To give.
You really have nothing to lose when you are
Nothing yourself.
A deep rooted pain in my chest grows from all the times
Nobody cared
If I was okay. Please tell me one more time, "It's just
A phase."
Please tell me that I will grow out
Of it.
Are my scar kissed wrists not
Proof enough.
I'm not
Okay.

#depression #helpme #ihatethis

Olivia Struthers Jun 2015

4,600 Insignificant Deaths

Your words are knives
And I have no more
Smiles to cover the
Scars.
Hollow eyes stare
Ahead at a crippled
Future.
Veins full with the
Poison of self-hatred
Pump to your
Heart.
A life wasted on
The horrors of the world.
A test subject born
To lose.
Added to the number
Of how many
Have failed.
An insignificant death.
4,600

#feelings #sad #depression #dark

Olivia Struthers Jun 2015

Full Of Yourself

Heads full of forgotten dreams.
Hearts full of broken hope.
Bones full of lovely aches.
Hands calloused by past lovers.
Arms gently kissed by moonlight.
Eyes glazed over as numbness settles.
Ears ringing with the silence of regret.
Skin torn by the oceans of the world.
You were broken from birth.
Darling it's time
To Rise.

#sad #depression #dark #ihatethis

Jun 2015

Kelsey

Crushed

Many times I put this pen to this blank paper, and many times it remains blank
  I try to write how I'm feeling but all I can think of are his blue loving eyes
  All I feel is love, warmth that used to radiate between us while we laid on the couch
  How it felt to be held close to his chest and kissed on the top of the head
  Look up to see that playful smile and we are engulfed with love
  But that was over a year ago, now I sit lonely on my bed
  You're never far from my thoughts
  Tears never far from my eyes.

#heartbreak #broken #wondering #crushed