Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Sabrina Nov 2018
I want to scream
Until this emotional ache goes away
I want to yell your name
And have you tell me everything is okay
But I know that won't happen
Because she's with you
Sabrina Jan 2019
I shouldn't expect anything from you anymore
Only "I'm sorry"
Because you hate yourself for the pain
You caused me
But that's okay now
Because the only one who's still suffering the consequences
The lesson
Through the pain
Is you
Difference between you and I right now is,
I've always been a quick learner.
Thank you.
Sabrina Nov 2018
how am i supposed to sleep
when i fear if you do not love me
Sabrina Dec 2018
Rise above
It all
Don't let anyone stop you
Not anymore
We won't fall
Let the rage take over you
Show them what you're made of
Show them the strength that's made you go up
Be the person
You've always wanted to be
Show them even though you've been through your own kind of hell,
You're still genuinely smiling.
i had a little lyricy tune i made up in my head and put it into a poem, this doesn't really apply to me but i'm sure it could inspire others :P
Sabrina Apr 2019
You must think you're so tough
Well let me tell you
Since you're my ex-love
I never want you back in my life
Don't come crying to me anymore
I don't wanna hear your lies
So I'll just stand back and watch your tears pour
Think you can cheat on me with her
Come crying to me once you left her
You tore my heart in pieces
Then you left me, baby
I couldn't believe it
Now that I'm over you
Meeting people new
May even be ******* your ex best friend too
Never always liked how you treated me
But I dealt with it, baby
I can't even believe me
Rose tinted glasses must've blinded me
Like you said
Can't you see?
Go run away from all your issues
I'll sit back
Maybe I'll ship you a box of tissues
Sabrina Nov 2018
I have this fear
Of not being good enough
Ever since he left
Put my happiness in debt
I'm scared of letting anyone in again
I want you to fall for me just like I fell for you
But in truth, perhaps I'm too broken for you
I don't wanna confess
In case it becomes a mess
So I'll just sit by myself and think about how I'll die silently crying for help
Sabrina May 2019
Stop the yelling
Stop the swearing
I can feel my tear ducts burning
We live in a house
Food and care
Driven everywhere
But how come I live in constant fear
Of the raising of voices
Up in here?
Stop the yelling
Stop the swearing
Can't we all just get along?
I can feel my sanity dropping
Maybe when I move out
My sanity won't be in a drought
whats the name of the phobia for the fear of loud noises/yelling
also everything is ok i just get upset over simple callouts even if it's positive
Sabrina May 2019
I've come to discover
That maybe it's better if I'm alone
I'll hate it
It'll just be a copy and paste
Some day my smile will be like the sun beaming from my face
Then I'll go back to wallowing in my own self-deprecation
You won't be able to keep up the pace
I'll push you away
You can try and stay but there's no guarantee
You'll probably up and flee
For your own safety
Which I understand
So I'll stay in my own little world
Up in my ****** up head
I'll lay in bed
And think of what could've been
As I feel my past sin
Corrupting my soul
Losing my happiness temporarily
As a whole
Sabrina Jun 2019
Remember that little girl?
So happy-go-lucky
Would do a little twirl
In her fluffy pink princess dress
Never had a reason to get upset
Well I'm sorry to say that she's long gone
Ran away
Now the girl that took her place loves dusk and dawn
That little girl is dead
Are you proud of what I am?
Are you proud of what I've become?
The little girl who acted like the morning sun
Look at the monster she is
Let her voice raise cause she can't keep it inside any longer
The little girl you once knew is no longer

Used to help her parents with everything
A hug and a kiss
An "I love you"
She never felt anything but happiness
So darling what happened that year?
What made the reality of the world become oh so clear?
I'm sure everyone remembers her
So clearly
Look at what she's become
This monster has become an eclipse
Blocking that morning sun

Look at the world they've created
Now I think they seem to hate it
As she'll march along
Trying to still be strong
She'll wear her big brave face
But inside that little girl is asphyxiated
What happened?
Do you miss her already?

Naive little girl
Saw nothing wrong with the world
Grew up to be
The one who's writing this poetry

Remember that little girl?
So happy-go-lucky
Would do a little twirl
In her fluffy pink princess dress
Never had a reason to get upset
Well I'm sorry to say that she's long gone
Ran away
Now the girl that took her place loves dusk and dawn
That little girl is dead
Are you proud of what I am?
Are you proud of what I've become?
The little girl who acted like the morning sun
Buried deep within the deepest parts of me
But I haven't forgotten her, please just trust me
I won't let you down
Are you proud of who I am?
Are you proud what I can do?
I'm sorry about the little girl they all once knew
Sabrina Dec 2018
I b̵̛̺̜̬̖̝͓͘l̸͎̺̯͇̰̈͛̈́͝a̶̞͉̖͊̉m̸̺̰̕̕ẹ̶̡̬̈́͠ͅ you
For tur̸̢̺͕̣̳͕͐͐̓̋̒̒n̵̡̻̳̬̤̄̐̐͋͒̍í̸͚̦̼͜ň̶̠͚͖̲͓̠̊͊̀g̷̠̑ ̶̤̪̙̪͉͗̅͊m̶͔̖̓̄̌́̃̓ę̸̨̩̘͎́͗̚ ̷̪̉̑́ͅi̸̹͖̮̰̐n̸̰̿̉̽ț̷̛͙ơ̴͕͉̟̦̭̂͗͠ ̷̨̬͖͖͍̄t̶͎̠͚̺̻͂͌̕͠ĥ̶̳͕̼͚̖̕i̶̫̿̀͋͝ş̵̭͙̜̓̃̏̓͗́
Cause that happy cheerful girl you knew before,
You killed when you forcefully locked down the door
To the future home she thought she'd share with you
You kept stirring the b̴̝͐̒͊̓r̶͕͉̜̙̆̍̈́́͒͜͝e̷͕̪̼̫͕͇͒̂̅̑̅̚ẅ̷͈̯́
Until the *** o̸̡̝̪̜͔̤͂̎̕͝͝v̷̜̭̀̊͗̾ȩ̶̪̙̻͍̱̒̓̐ŕ̸̡͖̞̐̇͝f̵̮͕̘͙̠̎͗̿ĺ̵̡͖͈͙͔̯̅ö̸́̿­̦̞̖̹͚͎w̸̞̐̀̕ͅĕ̸͚d̴̢̳͚͍̞̀̒̈́̑͋
Because while you're still young,
She's aged enough to be able to tell
***** and sweethearts apart
She's gained the knowledge of someone older
So while you're out there in your self-loathing
She'll be out here
G̷̺̩̱͂́l̷͉͇̳̒͒͜o̸͈̻͙͎͐̉w̶̤̗̅̈́̚ḯ̷̡̛̥͇̬͂̈́͘n̵̢͚͉̿̆͌̕̕g̸̢͕̺̪̤̈̀
But­ don't let that fool you
She's not t̴͉̰̤͉̀́̿͝h̴̲̎̈̑́̚e̴̲̲͙̓̑̊̓̓̕ͅ ̵͉͍̑͊͆͠s̸͍̲̗̊̂̽͜͠ḁ̵̡͇͖̰̾̈́m̵͓͇̖̮͚̠̄͆͊̐e̷̦͐́ ̵̳͎̘̅̔͑g̶̗̞͑͛̊ï̷̥͇͑̇͋r̵͕͕̈́͛̔̾̈̕ļ̶̳̳̟̜͔̉̇
as she was once before
s̸͕͋̒̀ḧ̸͇́̇̽͠ę̸̺͉̀͗̀͠'̴̞̫̟̋̎̉s̸̘̾͂ ̸̩͈̬̦̚g̶̨̛̮̺̅ô̴͇t̷̫̔́̕͜ ̸͔͋ā̷̤̑̓ ̸̖̈ḃ̴̳̳͖͑̑̏ĭ̶̛̯͍̭̍ͅt̶͕͖̠͠͝ ̶̹̪̃͆͐̚ȍ̴͙̖̈́̍͠f̵̺̖͎͛̇ ̸͖̟́͝a̸̟͔͕̤͗̅́͘ ̶̧̘̯͔̒̀ẗ̸̢̳̹́͠ḩ̴̻͉̗͊͒͊i̸͉̾c̴̙̻̔̔͜k̷͓̄͌̔è̸̥̟̓͆͜r̴̙̉ ̴̞͉͆́͐ş̶͙̘̻͂͐ķ̴̠̥̎̕ͅi̶̛̜͐͘n̸̗͚̠̬̑͒̕͝ ̴̲̀͑̂͛n̵̬͒o̷͕̜͊̈́̈̅ẃ̷̢͈͍̭
Ţ̶̭̿̈́h̴̭̗̣̒̽̄ḁ̴̡̤̥͌́ṋ̴̘̩́k̴̘͑̚s̷̰͑͛̌­̘ ̷̢̹́̿f̵̬̰̎̓̇͆ô̴̯̮̇̒̊r̵̻̲̲̈́ ̵̫̀̒̽ṁ̶̞̝̑͘a̷͖͒k̷̨̨̯̾͋͛ì̸̼̖n̶̮̈́̔͐̅g̶̰̽ ̴͈͇̯͠m̶̘̽̈́̈́̕é̵̼͠ ̶̢̼̱̅͊̈s̶̨̅ţ̶͍̅͒́͝ṟ̷̈́̊̚o̷͎͛͂́̆n̶͕̪̞͑͗̌̕͜ḡ̷͇͒̚
i wanted to make a poem using the zalgo text is all, i'm ok dw LOL
Sabrina Dec 2018
I'll try to withstand the storm inside my mind,
But sometimes it gets really scary
And no longer kind
But I carry on
With friends and loved ones next to me
Sometimes it gets a little dull
The happy flame starts to burn out
Sometimes I just need to use that smile
To re-light it
One day I'll find a permanent brighter light
At the end of the dark tunnel
I call my mind
Sabrina Mar 2019
My mind is scattered
My emotions scattered like a broken dinner platter
Numb but full of emotion
Emotional yet emotionless
This loneliness
Is eating me alive
It's as if my depression strives
On only that alone
Like a parasite
Feeding on anything you ingest
It leaves me staring blankly
As the text indicator blinks
And I feel any good emotion shrink
I'm numb
But I'm falling apart
And feel as small and as fragile as a crumb
Sabrina Nov 2018
I'll sit and watch the sunset
By myself
Wishing you were here
I'll sit and cry alone in the dark
Wishing you could hear
What you have done to me
All the pain and suffering
Took me by the hand, leaded me into wonderland
Just to kick me out
Laugh in my face
Again and again
Why must I think of those who never think of me?
Why must I remember your face so vividly?
If you don't love me then what's the point
I'll try and go on though
Without your hand to hold
Thanks for giving me your heart
Though it was temporary
I'll watch the sunset alone
Cause I can no longer call you my home
Sabrina Oct 2019
i'm pathetic
a sad excuse for a human being
i'm yet another one
who walks aimlessly down the lane
hoping one day i'll be free
from the demon in my brain
i love someone who shall never notice me
i love someone who is too good, even if he did
perhaps i'm not sane,
perhaps love is what's causing all these migraines
maybe one day i'll realize
that you're too far from my reach
you're too popular for me
so if you ever did look at me,
what would i be to you?
perhaps another female fan
begging with a preach
but i see so much in you
and you would never have a clue
honestly, these feelings are tiring
so i have to be poetic
in attempt to show the world what i'm feeling
why won't these useless feelings for you
leave me be?
Sabrina Mar 2019
Can someone please tell me
What's wrong with me?
I pull someone close then shove them away
But don't let them drown
Holding onto their hand but standing so far away
Begging them not to go
While also wanting my space
I'm scared of loving
And letting others in
I wanna trust him
So why can I not
Let my past sins go?
Sabrina Oct 2018
I hate seeing others happy
Perhaps it's because I feel like I cannot have that
Perhaps it's because I've had it once before
But I was left in the fog
Trying to find my way alone
I hate seeing others in love
Maybe it's because I've experienced it once before
But my heart was broken
and it's slowly recovering
short.
Sabrina Dec 2019
whatever this helpless feeling is
whatever the feeling is called
when you feel so sad
you're almost numb
where you just want to sleep
or disappear?
not die but just
forget
not have these feelings for this person anymore
it's a waste of time
energy
emotion
tears
it's delusional
yet i still would do anything
just to talk to him
why
what's wrong with me?
Sabrina Dec 2018
I fall for those who are too good for me
Those who deserve better
Someone who deserves a beautiful, happy, girl
I'm not that
I fall for those who are better than me
I hope one day they'd love me
I've been lied to and left
My emotions left unkept
It's to the point where I've swept up all of the tears of the past
That keep coming back to the present
Nothing ever lasts
I just want someones hand to hold
Perhaps I'm being too bold
I know I'm young,
I know I'm dumb,
but this loneliness is eating me alive
Those drawings aren't real guys
The real ones could never look at me in a loving way
Not like he did
So I guess I'll just sit alone
My thoughts wandering all over my mind
Until I find someone who I can call mine
With tears streaming down my cheeks,
My happiness bleak,
I'll keep looking
For the one I seek
Sabrina Sep 2018
I simply cannot express myself any other way,
I can only do so with a puddle of ink on my paper day by day.
The words don't flow as easily with a pen and paper sitting in front of me
It'll take too long for me to write.
I simply cannot tell you how I feel naturally
My anxiety stops me, my fears stop me, and I hesitate or choke on my own words.
So if you could just please understand that I express myself with writing or songs,
Then maybe you and I would get along.
Just a little more.
I know you care and I know you wanna help,
but how can you help me when you're too busy ignoring me?!
I live in fear of loving and trusting others,
Always doubting those who confess to me because anyone who ever has done that,
has left.
Perhaps I just wasn't good enough or maybe it was just me in general, perhaps it could've been them as well but either way I'm tired.
So please just ******* love me, please ******* understand that you're not the only ******* one who needs help.
I do too.
Please.
Hold me, please.
Sabrina Jan 2019
make this invisible emotional suffering end
maybe then
i'll feel good enough
Sabrina Jan 2019
I'm trying not to think you're the one
Just in case something goes wrong
But I really hope it doesn't
Because you make me feel things
I haven't felt before he killed my trust
Sabrina Dec 2018
I'm
strong
enough
but
sometimes i wish for just
someone to love
and for them to love me back
perhaps
thats too much though
Sabrina Mar 2019
I will breathe
I will run
You guys go
Have your fun
I'll stay here
In my own self-pity
Until maybe something could fix me
My mind
Is a hurricane
My soul
It'll never leave
My heart
So many stitches
So many wounds
But it still will beat
I'm stronger than I know
Though I don't really believe it
I've made it this far
Sometimes I don't really know if I could take it
But I go
I go on
Until maybe I find someone
I am strong
And I know it
Maybe my depression will leave me
If I post it
Sabrina Dec 2018
I have much better things to be doing
Than to worry about someone who forgot about me
Sabrina Apr 2019
If I wasn't so scared of death
I would've ended it so so long ago
Get me out of this hell hole
That's also my mind and soul
Like I've heard before,
"When we all fall asleep, where do we go?"
I hate myself and fear I'm never good enough
So that's why my exterior is me acting so tough
Don't wanna let anyone in
Where do I even begin?
Used to be such a pure child
Now I'm full of sin
If I could ever find peace within myself
Love for myself
Someone please do tell me
Please let me know
"When we all fall asleep, where do we go?"
It's one of my favorite quotes from the Billie Eilish song "Bury a Friend"
When we all fall asleep, where do we go?
Why
Sabrina Mar 2019
Why
Why can I never be good enough?
Why can I never be strong enough?
Why can I never look in the mirror,
Think a little clearer
And see beauty in me?

— The End —