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Feb 24 · 582
The Want of Indepencence
Hannah Feb 24
Why?
Why do you have to make me feel like I’m tied down?
Tied down to your rules, your wants, and your needs.
I have choices too.
Opinions unheard, ignored, mocked.
I’m one of three daughters, yet you choose me.
The only time I’m chosen is so you can make your attempts at manipulating me,
taking any sense of freedom I should have over my future, my life, my needs.
Denying the chance to let me prove you wrong.
You may be right, I have called Wolf too many times but in this case, it’s different.
Give me the chance to prove you wrong,
to prove that I can do it.
That I can be free from this rope that holds me back from what I want.
Let me just be independent for once without the need for your so-called supervision and advice.
The advice that’s more like scolding and yelling.
Darkening my mood, deepening the depression.
Your words linger in my head for days upon days.
Have you ever taken a chance to stop and think that you may be the reason?
The reason I am so desperate to escape,
the reason I am dreaming of the day I can be independent.
Jan 13 · 280
The One
Hannah Jan 13
The whispers in the wind are starting again.
Every inch of me is covered in chills as my soul passes through my body.
It desperately struggles to choose between many or none.
Choosing many gives it the chance to be hurt more as there are more to be hurt by.
Invisibility is a strong feeling which is greater among more.
None can feel like an empty well that will soon be filled by the tears falling from my cheeks.
Sometimes none is more but often it is not.
Neglected by the souls of those who are too preoccupied by the slightest things,
Failing to give one second of their time to the one that needs it.
The one who needs to be embraced and feel the warmth of caring.
The one that wants to feel the love from words spoken to them of any topic.
The one who desperately wants to just be noticed for more than a mere second.
The very one who wants to feel like they are enough.
Dec 2020 · 246
Break
Hannah Dec 2020
I never get a ******* break.
Your that annoying sound from the dead fire alarms just chirping away at me.
It never stops.
I open my mouth and am silenced by you.
Your words of fire and rage.
I don’t know who’s winning.
You or my mind.
I can’t ever get a ******* break from this mess of a world.
Too many tasks with too little time.
Struggling to do right.
Your hellish yells don’t do anything but feed the fire of my anger.
The very anger that disrupts my ability to do what I need to do.
Running around like your messenger.
I just can’t ever catch a ******* break.
Dec 2020 · 467
The Wanted Embrace
Hannah Dec 2020
I just wanted you to hold me
But I guess it was too much for me to ask.
You were too busy worrying about my past.
And I was left there wondering how long this will last.
I really just needed you to embrace me in your arms.
But instead, my news to you didn’t sound an alarm.
I was filled with guilt to the rim.
Hearing you say I made a mistake made my whole world dim.
The sparkle I once had with this world was lost.
I was in pieces falling apart.
But you didn’t seem to care about my heart.
I really just needed you to embrace me in your arms.
But I guess it was too much for me to ask.
Dec 2020 · 457
Fear
Hannah Dec 2020
I’m weak.
I’m weak in the knees, in my hands, in my head.
All around I feel me trembling
Unable to stop.
Fear is the culprit behind the bars.
The cause of the pain.
The gut aching, hand shaking, head spinning sensation of the one and only known as fear.
Heart drops at the first thought
Beating as loud as a drum, as hard as a wrecking ball can impact a stone cold icy brick wall.
Escalating, elevating, climbing in speed.
Until it can’t carry that load of yours any longer.
Do you hear that?
Silence.
Silence at last.
Dec 2020 · 495
You
Hannah Dec 2020
You
I am wondering when you will have time for this.
I can see you
But you don’t.
I can’t hear you
But you won’t
I have tried
You have failed
To do your part in this world.
Dec 2020 · 754
Ask Me
Hannah Dec 2020
Do you care about me?
It doesn’t feel like it.
Do you forget that I am here too?
I feel invisible.
Do people forget that I like to talk too?
I feel alone.
Why are you not asking me?
I need you to ask me
Are you okay?
I need to hear those words.
I need someone to say them so I can release my bottle.
To help me on my path to happiness.
But I’m not sure when that day will come.
I’ve been waiting for a while.
No one seems to notice.
I suffer invisibly.
Just waiting.
Dec 2020 · 305
Wake Up
Hannah Dec 2020
How?
How do we live in a world with such chaos?
How did we get here?
Tell me!
How did you manage to let the precious Earth turn into a toxic pile of waste.
Riots everywhere.
A virus on the go.
Trash piling up causing pollution.
Children are not safe.
Parents are not safe.
No one is safe in this cruel world.
Wake up and listen to us!
Why aren’t you listening?
There isn’t going to be a world to wake up to if nothing changes.
Reality is knocking and you need to answer.
Wake up and learn to be responsible.
I said wake up!
Nov 2020 · 494
Hidden Fire
Hannah Nov 2020
Don't let anybody cut your tongue,
when failing to comprehend what you mean.
We are all just hidden tigers among
the distant places that have yet to be seen.

Colors of fire draped across our hearts,
when the ones who hate start to bark.
Looks of terror reflected off our eyes
of the ones who dare to stand and criticize.

A glance is all it takes,
for their knees begin to shake.
They see the potential we have within,
afraid to find out who will win.

The ones who dared to stand and criticize,
now don't dare to look us in the eyes.
Finally being able to overcome,
the fear we had when the fight had begun.

The eyes are the secret key,
that reveals our now discovered mystery.
Unleashing the inner tiger
brings forth that hidden fire.
Nov 2020 · 589
The Unwanted Battle
Hannah Nov 2020
Being braver than ever before.
Watching you walk out that door like a warrior.
Relentlessly refusing to lose, the battle you did not choose.
Your might will help you win this fight.
This is about a family member's battle with cancer.
Oct 2020 · 466
Under
Hannah Oct 2020
I don’t have time to breathe.
I feel my heart beating between my teeth.
It’s beating...
It’s beating...
It’s beating...
Until I can feel no longer.
Water is slowly rising above my head.
Sep 2020 · 189
When the Time Comes
Hannah Sep 2020
Heartbreak.
In a bottomless pit you shall find me with my heart buried beneath.
Feelings ****** away by a black hole leaving nothing but shallow emptiness.
Words flood your mind that one would not dream to think of.
Guilt. Anger. Sadness. Disappointment.
Some say only time can heal, but a minute feels like eternity.
Everything happens for a reason.
Whether you know the reason now or not.
At the right time God will see me and hear me.
But all I can do now is pray.
Jun 2020 · 56
Hard to Tell
Hannah Jun 2020
Am I invisible?
Do you not see me or hear me?
Why don’t you pay attention?
I want to talk,
But I don’t know if you do.
You are so hard to read,
so I just stay silent.
Jun 2020 · 298
Three Simple Words
Hannah Jun 2020
I hate you.
I love you.

The same amount of words
                                                      but
 ­                                                                 ­           cOmPleTely DifFereNt.
Can change someone's life
Positively
                                                 ­      or
                                                                ­                                   Negatively.
Choose wisely because it could
effect
                                                    ­ you
                                                             ­                                             too.
In the end, it all comes down to you and
Three
                                                    Sim­ple
                                                             ­                                             Words.
May 2020 · 247
Weight
Hannah May 2020
I just want to let go
of all the weight on my shoulders.
Forget the past and all my problems,
so I can throw away the pain.
I just want to be free from it.
I want to let go of it all.
Forget the past,
forget the pain,
that all my problems have caused me.
To let them go,
as I say goodbye.
May 2020 · 292
Be True
Hannah May 2020
I’m trying to figure out who I am.
The person locked inside.
The one who’s waiting for a prince to rescue her.
I dream of the day I finally realize who I really am.
The girl who laughs, smiles, and shines,
the one who never stops being herself.
To get rid of the girl she used to be.
Sad, insecure, and lonely.
The very one who cried at night,
afraid of showing her true self to the world.
But little did she know,
That was all she needed to do.
Believe and trust and eventually
The best would come
May 2020 · 213
Heart
Hannah May 2020
Heartbreak
Sad, fragile
Breaking, hurting, losing
Always knows when things are right.
Beating, loving, trusting
Red, strong
Heart
May 2020 · 331
Eyes
Hannah May 2020
As I look in the mirror, what do I see?
A beautiful person looking right back at me.
Staring softly into my eyes,
wondering ever so much about how time flies.
Every night I'm thinking about you,
as I stare out my window at the view.
Those days in the past will always be treasured,
but were sadly too short to even be measured.
I'm looking back on all the good times,
remembering all that I have seen with my own two eyes.
May 2020 · 942
Wondering
Hannah May 2020
I’ve been wondering when the trees will grow me shelter.
I’ve been wondering when the waves will turn me over.
I’ve been wondering when I’ll finally find a friend.
I’ve been wondering when I’ll find a place to live.
I’m finally standing on my feet.
Breathing in the air.
Lying on the beach.
Sitting there,
Thinking to myself,
I don’t know what happened,
but I’ll find out in the end.
May 2020 · 383
Falling
Hannah May 2020
I'm finally falling down
From this cloud.
I'm finally setting my heart straight
Getting my mind clear
Of all the things holding me down.

I can finally see
What I couldn’t before.
And it’s finally clear
I'm looking at the door.
I'm waiting to break free
From what’s holding me back.
I don’t know what it is,
But I’m tired of it hurting me.
May 2020 · 164
Lost and Out
Hannah May 2020
Tell me.
Do you see the real me?
Can you read inside my mind?
Can you tell what I’m thinking all the time?
Do you know what it’s like to be trapped inside
With no way to escape?
I can try and try
But will give up
Losing my train of thought.
I’m lost again.
I need help.
My mind pushes me away and I’m too far gone
For any hope that I can be found.
I hide there waiting for a knight to rescue me,
To sweep me off my feet and take me back home.
But as I sit there,
And wait and wait and wait,
I realize there is no escape.
I'm trapped in this void until I get my thoughts back.
If ever.
Finally after waiting in the dark silence,
A sliver of light shines the way
As I hear it quietly say,
This is your way out.
A way to not be stuck in silence.
A way to get out and let your mind roam free.
Hiding here behind it all is how I used to live.
May 2020 · 750
ADHD
Hannah May 2020
Time seems to slip away before my eyes,
witnessing the change of the open skies.
At night, I tend to not get much sleep.
My workload seems to pile into a heap.
The internal battles with my brain
are like the endless tracks to a train.
My struggle to focus lasts day and night,
it causes me, myself, and I to fight.
I don't need to be scolded by any other.
I am already doing that to myself undercover.
Sometimes I feel like no one knows,
how hard it is to keep my steady workflow.
Procrastinator is my middle name.
Rushing to turn things in on time isn't a fun game.
While doing work I stare off into space,
even if it's not the best time and place.
I'll ask for instructions but they make no sense.
It's like understanding is being blocked by a fence.
On test days I am just so slow,
that my friends can't wait for me so they all go.
My slow is other people's fast.
I wish this would just go away at last.
I have dealt with this all my life,
but I've learned to make living with it less strife.
This isn't how I would have liked to be,
but I can't help it because it's all from my ADHD.
May 2020 · 477
Never Have I Ever
Hannah May 2020
Never have I ever thought I was pretty.
Never have I ever thought I was smart.
Never have I ever thought I was skinny.
Never have I ever thought I would get a boyfriend.
Never have I ever felt like someone believed in me.
Never have I ever felt not alone.
Never have I ever felt like I was enough.
Never have I ever not wanted you to know:
You ARE pretty.
You ARE smart.
You ARE perfect the way you are.
You DON'T need a boyfriend to live your best life.
You ARE believed in.
You ARE strong.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
YOU ARE ENOUGH.
May 2020 · 263
Dreams and Life
Hannah May 2020
Dreams are like art canvases.
You can paint on them or do anything to them,
but no matter what you do they are still beautiful.
When you sleep you fall into a whole new world,
your world,
where you can control everything.
They are not as beautiful as your life.
Your life is also like an art canvas.
But this world is real,
are you are living in it right now.
Your life is filled with wonder, joy, excitement, and more.
You will be able to experience some of the most wonderful journeys you will ever have.
Those will be the memories you will want to have for as long as you live.
No matter what.
May 2020 · 548
Name Twin
Hannah May 2020
It's hard to miss this girl.
She stands tall above the crowd.
Like a skyscraper looking down upon the ground.
We are like little ants that she might see,
until blown away with her personality.
Her smile is unique, but it makes her special.
One of a kind, you can't even say that slightly.
Her smile is like a cup of hot chocolate,
warm and sweet.
Like the prettiest flower,
but full of mighty power.
Her beauty is indescribable.
How smart she is is unbelievable.
She's better than any comedian out there in this world.
Makes you laugh when you need it the most.
She's like a piñata,
full of surprises.
Somehow she will be there for you at your worst.
She's like the right answer to a test.
She might just forget your name at first,
but you will never be able to forget her because she is the best.
Four years and counting, to continue it won't be strife.
You simply just need a name twin in your life.
May 2020 · 1.0k
Him
Hannah May 2020
Him
I could say he is like a sunflower,
always growing very tall,
He is always there for me, with his guy-like power,
He is the one I would want to catch me if I fall.
He stands out from the crowd,
with the help of his icy-blue eyes,
in the bleachers talking, cheering, laughing out loud,
like the brightest star in the darkest of skies.
The way he illuminates my world with his smiles,
he lights it up and never seems to let it dim,
he could keep me walking for miles,
in search of anything and him.
Because of this, you stand out to me during the day and night,
like a shooting star taking flight.
Mar 2020 · 434
Out There
Hannah Mar 2020
The sun is happy.
The wind is cool.
The skies are clear for miles.
My heart is content on this fine spring day.
Being locked inside this house of mine
won’t stop me from exploring
the world out there untouchable beyond this safety glass.
Beauty to be explored with the eye
To be observed for once.
Peaceful surroundings with little disturbance
When everything is calm around you.
With all of this comes keeping spirits up
And that is done by the universe and its heartwarming sun.
We can imagine going out there but know we shouldn’t.
To be safe the most we could do is stay within this beautiful looking glass.
Hoping, wishing, and praying this all ends fast.
To be able to go back out there and spread the joy
That others may truly desire.
The joy that comes from not the sun
But from being with one another.
Mar 2019 · 3.4k
Sun, Moon, and Ocean Waves
Hannah Mar 2019
When I think of the sun at night,
of how it is a flashlight turned on to help us see throughout the day,
or how during Summer Solstice the sun is fully charged.

As time goes on, it slowly runs out of batteries and its light gets dimmer,
when it hits the Autumnal Equinox, it has half its battery life left.
Winter Solstice is when it is just about to run out of energy, but doesn’t.
It hangs onto the last bit of energy it can without giving up, with hope it will recharge, not knowing if it will.

Then finally it begins charging, slowly gaining more battery life until the Summer Solstice marks that it is fully charged and when it can continue living without worrying that it will die.
With the help of the Sun’s day schedule the, Moon can create and follow its own.

When I look into the dark, mysterious night sky covered by the clouds, there is nothing left to see except the luster of the full moon.
The moon is like an eye, looking through a keyhole at what lies behind the dark door.

I say I would wonder what it would be like,
being the moon,
looking down at everyone, slowly fading each night, into its own kind of sleep,
such a deep sleep, that even if it was the clearest of skies, its light would not show,
not even a sliver of light shining in the dark,
to leave nothing but the stars out in the open to be seen.

I lie in bed at night,
falling asleep,
thinking of what I may dream about,
Wondering if the moon dreams too.

The moon.
The glowing orb in the sky that illuminates our surroundings.
The thought of the moon sparks something that makes me think of the ocean tide, water, and waves.

The waves.
The cool, crisp, salty waves always crashing on the sandy shore.

When I think of waves, I don’t just think of water.
Instead I think of the feelings behind them.
What if the waves showed how the ocean felt?
When there are a few calm waves the ocean could be happy.
When it has a lot of waves it could be excited, upset, or jealous.
If we infuriate the ocean it shows its anger with its salty, drowning waves, very tall.

And when low tide comes rolling in,
the ocean craves more water due to dehydration.
When the high tide arrives,
its thirst is quenched.

That’s why you don’t mess with the ocean.
Go with the flow,
treat it with respect,
don’t throw your trash in it,
because if you don’t know,
you won’t be able to control the ocean,
because it has a mind of its own.

— The End —