They ask me what I like about you -
as if it could be said in a sentence or two...
As if words could even express,
all the ways in which you make me a mess.
Oh, mad heart, if you could just quit
wishing and yearning, just for a bit.
I need a rest, from this lasting ache,
to stop thinking about him, asleep or awake.
Just give up, just don't, there isn't a hope,
you delude yourself, just start to cope.
"It's better to know then to keep wondering" -
but could I stand the rejection's sting?
Just holding these feels, it's too much to bear,
Sorry, can't help it, I simply care.
This way, at least, I'm the one to blame,
this way, I don't have to face the shame.
Somehow, it feels, just like control,
I'm hurting but I made the call.
Giving up and losing are two different things,
one pain is dull, the other one stings.
This way you won't feel sorry for me,
this way I get to keep my dignity.
Gracefully retrieve, and bow my head,
it's better, for all, that nothing is said.
I can't fight for you, that's not how it's done,
stubbornness isn't how love is won.
Perchance, I pray, I am mistaken,
From this bad dream, I might be awakened?
You might be braver, reach out first,
finally quench this maddening thirst?
Oh, it's a fool's heart speaking again,
a dreamer's mist; wondering "when?"
when will you notice, what a blindman could see,
what I feel everyone notices already?
Darling, answer my silent plea,
don't be cruel, I pray thee.
For when you look deep into my eyes,
you must know, there cannot be any lies.
It's cowardly of me, to leave it to you,
Sorry, again; that's all I can do.
I'll stay nearby, since I can't get away,
an ember of hope, a dawn of a day.
But regardless of all, I need to say,
thank you, my muse, my sunlight ray.