the
smile across,
this women's,
face,
brings me,
so much joy!

I play to her,
painting,
a picture,
of her face,

A picture,
of this woman's face,
is left inside,
my head,

for she has left,
and I alone,
with a picture of her face,

I can play,
for her still,
for her memory,
never fades,

she is still,
right by my side,
I still have,
a picture of her face.

and though,
she left,
so sudden,
so abrupt,
I remember,
one important thing,
the way she smiled,
the way she laughed,
and how I still have,


I miss,
my love,
so dear,
to me,
gone,
in a flash,

only to leave,
a picture of her face,

she only left,
a picture of her face.

my love is gone,
and left so fast,
leaving me here,
to play to,
a picture of her face,

I remember,
her smile,
the way she laugh,
but only stare,
to a picture of her face,

my love is gone,
and left so fast,
leaving me here,
to play to,
a picture of her face,

I remember,
her smile,
the way she laugh,
but only stare,
to a picture of her face,


I still,
play to her,
for she has left,
and I alone,
with a picture of her face,

I will make it,
though this,
if it kills me.

you fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

You read my battle,
off the scars on my arm,
you seek a remedy,
to help you get along.

you fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

I gave you advice,
you never used,
no matter what I tried,
you got worse and worse,

you fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

you stopped sleeping,
stopped eating,
stopped living,
I felt your pain and it was killing me,

you fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

I looked at you,
and saw my past,
every time,
you would over react,

you fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

I had to do something,
but couldn't alone,
I wrote it all down,
and turned to an adult,

you fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

you got some help,
I passed my mission,
or so I thought,
until it was all for attention,

you fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

You lied to me,
and reported me for harassment,
after all the nights,
I tried to help you with your depression,

you fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

I couldn't of lived with myself,
if something had happened,
I told people!
when really your hospital bracelets told everyone.

So now I'm falling deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

My world is coming down around me,
all because I tried to be a good person,
do the right thing,
now this is all on me,

I fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

I'm trapped and scared,
now everyone hates me,
the darkness is back,
and it seems to have trapped me.

I fell deeper and deeper,
down the pit fall of depression,

Its closing in on me,
my thoughts are dark,
I'm still trying,
to shut off my heart.

I am,
a bad person
a coward
a failure
a fool

I apologies,
for the awful things I do,

I am,
an ***
an idiot
ashamed
at fault

I beg you,
to not take it as an assault,

I am,
atrocious
awful
careless
and childish

I am deeply sorry,
you cant handle what I dish out,

I am,
crazy
disgraceful
disgusting
dishonest

I am filled with regret,
I'm sorry I'm not modest,

I am,
distressed
disturbed
embarrassed
forgetful

I am filled with regret,
for not being careful.

I am,
guilt-ridden
guilty
horrible
humiliated

I am going to make this right,
no matter how much time I've wasted.

I am,
hurtful
idiotic
impulsive
in pain

I am in the wrong,
and the one to blame,

I am,
inadequate
irresponsible
lost
lousy

I am filled with regret,
for speaking so proudly,

I am,
mean
miserable
misguided
not perfect

I am genuinely sorry,
I make you so ticked,

I am,
out of my mind
out of sorts
out-of-control
out-of-line

I am regretful,
I complain and wine,

I am,
overly critical
pathetic
regretful
remorseful

I am responsible for this,
I am too forgetful,

I am,
ridiculous
rotten
sad
selfish

I am shameful,
I should be less careless,

I am,
stupid
terrible
troubled
unacceptable

I am unfair,
I should be more responsible,

I am
unthoughtful
unworthy
upset
wrong

I am willing to do anything,
willing to get help,

I am willing to make myself,
Gone.

I'm empty,
like a run down house.

I'm no longer sure,
of my whereabouts.

Where I am,
Why I'm here,

I wish for my company,
to disappear.

Now I'm faded and stale,
like an rusty old nail,

I wish to be social,
But I was always at someones disposal,

I wanted some space,
sometime to think and retrace,

to let go,
of the bad,

to try to stop,
being sad,

but the pain returns,
and the flooding thoughts burn,

Cast down,
destroyed,

no matter,
the length I avoid,

My thoughts run through my head,
and when I believe they have fled,

no matter how much I exceed,
my thoughts hurt me til I bleed,

I cannot,
escape,

the world handed me,
my fate.