I often wonder if you've seen me, an' in which form,
- throughout these various apps and poetry forums.
Was it Aegidious you met? Or perhaps Phillip?
Nay; - thy hath not read from any o' them, I would bet.
Are these words but some unheard and meaningless hiccup?
Are they to be scribbl'd out through my blood an' my sweat -
- only to be fallen upon by thee most deaf ears
- and thee most visionless eyeballs of all the Earth's land?
Nay - for: if my words can bring but one person a cheer,
- should I aquire even just one anonymous fan,
- only then I'd say I had done an alright job here.
To write with all o' your soul - or to left unwritten?
I feel not the need to give you my opinion.
August 2nd, 2018
You're online but you won't answer me;
- when all I want from you is to
- respond to my plea
- regarding your safety.
Don't expect to hear my voice
- if you do make the choice
- of visiting him.
For: if you should choose
- to visit him,
- it's me that you lose.
Don't expect to see my face
- if you choose to reside in space
- around him.
Don't expect my smile or laugh,
- if you choose him from the past.
And- remember to forget me
- before you go to see - him.
Don't expect to hear from me again
- if you do decide that you'll visit him.
I will not take a stab like that to my heart
- from such a cold and jagged shard;
- especially since you know how I feel,
- especially since you know it's a deal-
-breaker that will leave me alone..
I'd say, "leave us alone," but no..
I'm sure you might once again find a home
- in that ***** you call Jon's heart.
An' I'll be left - to die an inevitable death
- one which is planned - by my own hands.
Oh - what it'd be like
- to not be awake
- before the break of light
- before the dawn of day.
If only I didn't slave away
- for each waking hour of my days.
No! My woes won't go,
- much as I may hope
- they are passers-through.
No! My woes won't go
- 'way, not tomorrow or today..
- regardless o' how much I hope
- that they do.
If you choose to be - by him, from the past,
- it may be the last - you'll e'er see of me.
Ay! If you should go - to look 'pon his face,
- you will be eras-ing me: this, you know.
If you decide to, - I cannot stop you..
- just keep in mind: I won't make it through.
So - will you say, "Bye?" - I guess I will see.
The days, now, are so strange
- and I cannot manage
- these thoughts within my brain.