why the poppies?
for only they grow,
where no man can live...
and where no man has conquered,
only in no-mans land do they grow.
where many have withered and fall,
like markers with no names,
we know where they lay...
and where they have bled.
only a red poppies grow there,
among the fallen dead,
now as they rest an eternal slumber,
one can never dream or tell...
the horrors they encountered...
they who gave so much, shall never grow old...
they shall never be forgotten.

We are not merely heroes
But sons of the flesh of Adam
We answer the call when needed
We feel pain and endure life
Till the grave absolves us from our sins
We carry on our duty with valor

© 2019

facing the early morning
we wish that wouldn't come
scared of what may bring upon
slumber brings such comforts
yet who else shall face it for you
scared i know but you are strong
its time to get up time to rise
to face the gleam of day

Will you dance with me?
A sweet melody,
whispers of us two,
and the girl I knew.

Let me clasp you close to me,
as gentle as the breezes that breathes,
harmonic symphony that sparks,
cascading through the world.

Stumbling scattering embers,
blissful angel smiles and laughter,
blushing youth that blossom about,
captivated entwined hand in hand.

I spun you round and round,
you fell laughing to the ground,
I thought I could keep you near,
I never thought you'd leave here.

vivid blurs of such memories,
felt like distant lucid dreams,
wandering thoughts of merry months,
she sways away as did time does.

I went searching for you, far and wide,
I never thought that you had died,
I kept you alive in my heart,
so we'd never ever be apart.

Through the gardens that bloom,
peaceful plains and quiet rooms,
humming your serene songs,
distant thoughts hang so strong.

Today, I found you once again,
your hair blew in the summer's wind,
but alas to me, you weren't the same,
somehow you had broken the chain.

For Spring it sprang as Spring it does,
winter’s loss becomes summers gleam,
a song of old enchanting memories,
for life has a passion for living.

The ring I gave you, you held dear,
I can see it now, though I'm no seer,
I'll go looking for you once again,
even though our paths don't blend.

So dance in the future with me,
my sweet love,
and promise you'll wait for me,
for I'll be there, by and by,
and sing to you our lullaby.

I'm the sorcerer, you're the witch,
never thought that you could stitch,
together with a broken heart,
you'd found a boy who wasn't quite smart.

I want to be like you are that of one light,
to see your eyes looking back into mine,
in the sight of every eye underneath the moon,
promenading through the mid starry night,
acoustic harmony of a heart that beats of one.

timeless illusion that swirls in the mist,
underneath the milk light of moon,
all that was lost is now revealed,
beckoning hums of golden memories.

I fell for you, I took you in,
though the light in my castle was dim,
I could see the spell cast upon you,
oh my dear sweet, I love you.

I hold you closer than I ever knew I could do
hoping this is not a mere dream or your silly ruse
I thought I’d recognize when love was true
just a foolish hopeless romantic who fell for you

Am I ready for love or maybe I'm just your friend
still thinking and doubting full of questions in the end
I wish it was real and I hope I'm not just an option
Should there be a difference, are there any instructions?

I hope you stick around, we can still figure this out
to help me clear all of our frightening doubt
please me help figure things out even if things go south
am I ignorant or was I fooled by the stories I knew

I thought the birds would sing and sparks would fly
in my mind I hope that this moment would pause in time
I held you hoping you'd never leave me and take flight
hope its true when you said I love you that special night

Knowing,
Oh woe is knowing
As you try to say your genius no one listens.
As you talk to others they never understand.
You can't socialize because your all alone in your interests.

All the sheep follow the wolves.

Your in a crowd, surrounded by people yet alone.
No cares, no one pays mind, they all roll their eyes.
They don't want to wake up.

All the sheep follow the wolves.

Alienated from your, society, culture, and religion.
All they do is their normal.
nothing they do is normal, **** their normal.
Their normal is stupid, ignorant, and will bring destruction to them all.

All the sheep follow the wolves.

You feel like an alien from a faraway star.
Yet still human.
They constantly say that you are weird, strange, incoherent.
But that because they haven't broke out of their deep box, with no escape it seems to them.

All the sheep follow the wolves.

You with a mind of enterprise you try everything you can to save them.
But it all doesn't work.
For they all will never listen.
Then they try to blame their problems on you.

All the sheep follow the wolves.

The scapegoat has come, the end is nigh.
They call you a witch, enemy of the state, criminal, and worshiper of the devil.

All the sheep follow the wolves.

What is the ultimate irony is.
They are the agents of the devil, for what is ******, but sin.
And so they set you on the altar, tie you down and.

Sacrifice to the wolves.

And so they howl in unison and that is the last thing you hear.
Not your mothers comforting voice, but the sheep and the wolves howling til your last breath.

A set of children
The galaxy extends
Garden of imagination
Bridging the gap
Beckoning breeze
That melts the snow
Roller skating past the moon
As we try to evolve
Surreal dreams fill the air
A reverie of endeavor
Black rainbow hues
That paints a broken mirror
Sailing and gliding
At the edge of my sanity

"The guns thundered endlessly,
Pitting holes all over the ground;
Yet that was a few years ago
And now this grassy hill utters no sound

"That is akin to the terror
That once sounded here long ago
As soldiers on both sides
Died in trying to defeat the foe.

"Yet in this grassy, peaceful land
Where red poppies dance in the breeze,
Once, men were cruelly butchered
So that other nations might be free.

"Upon this green hill
Where birds twitter in the trees,
Once cacophony reigned
And there was never a moment of peace.

"Then the ground shook
With the rumbles of artillery
While men charged again and again
Only to be slaughtered brutally.

"This place, then, was not green
But an ugly, muddy color
While men's blood poured out
As in their death throes they suffered.

"Pain! Death! And all for what?
What reason is there in this gory?
Many of them might have asked,
Gone from them dreams of glory

"As they only tried to stay alive
In this hell-wrought ruin
That in their worse dreams never imagined
Could be this terrible destruction.

"Silence, here, it never was
Nor was peace to be found
In this place accursed by all
Where endlessly was heard the sounds

"Of men dying, bleeding in agony
As the gun thundered incessantly
And their victims' screams rent the air,
A hellish combination frightening.

"Now, there is no noise
That is akin to the terror raged then
As they fought and died
To set free captive nations.

"Here, the sun shines warmly
And the poppies dance in the breeze
As no sound disturbs the sacred silence
Save the birds up in the trees.

"If you look out, you will see
There, on the plain where so many died,
Which is now grown over with grass
Thousands of white crosses lie;

"The only thing remaining
As a reminder of what happened here
Where men fought and died
In endless agony of fear.

"Yet if one is very still,
One can hear them crying out;
In the silence of their deaths,
One might still hear them shout:

"'Have we died unsung, unhonoured?
Our graves here lie unnumbered.
Did we give our all, our lives even,
For a fruitless war fought in vain?'

"Though wars may come again,
And it is certain they will,
No, they did not die in vain.
We shall always remember this sacred hill

"That marks their final resting place,
A peaceful cemetery
Instead of a war-torn plain.
That all will remember eternally."

I shall be the instrument...
The lord shall be your notes...
The people shall be the body and soul to play its righteous tune...
And may it be heard that peace and order has prevail...
And so will the heavenly kingdom shall be unveiled...

The feeling of pain
The feeling of fear
The feeling of falling
And never reaching the end,
I'm still falling
I'm still here
I'm still alive
I have no fear..
I allow death to take my soul
In trauma of death isn't it all obvious....death
Isn't what I wanna fear....
I don't feel
I don't think
I don't know
When it will end
Still falling
Still fearing
Still crying
Because I never felt good enough for you
Enough to breath
Enough to live....
But
I'm still falling
And I don't know when I will hit the ground....

Christ took a spear to the breast
You can take one too remember that
When they crucify you.
We walk upon this land
He walk on water and turned it to wine  
Yet we know not what what we do
Remember that when they crucify you.

And the sea parts,
And the clouds make way,
And the land trembles,
And the thunder roars loud
As to the lightning clashes
Its the most horrific story that we've heard to date.

His death, painted on a child's face.
Anointed like David and those before him
And those restless eyes,
Who tears have baptized them
My fathers watching over me.

And we the people hack each other down,
As we have done to our brother Abel
Have we not tired of the mark of Cain
have we forgotten we were brothers
Have we forgotten we breathe and bleed the same
I still hear the horrid hellish sounds

Voices that spread love and peace fall on deaf ears
Till innocent blood has spilled too much
Shall we heed or glare till it happens near
How much more should we slaughter

Dear good sir,

I have the honor to address
And cite my grievance and stress
I am very slow to anger
Yet I demand your answer
Careful how you proceed
At times I am Intemperate indeed  
Slandering my name with disrespect
Apologize I shall accept with no reject
Or prepare for both of us will bleed
I have not been so cowardly or shy
On how I act in the public eye
In the field, face-to-face by dawn
Choose good sir fist, swords or guns drawn

your humble colleague,
M. Mendiola

If I were to disappear if they come for me in the night
Will anyone know what i did when the sun shined bright
Though i once lived breathe and stand
To fight for justice with a close fist in defiance
Shall i raise my voice and cry out against silence
Even if i was taken by those within the shadow
Truth be told  i was foolishly brave to resist
No one would know my final thoughts
Yet I am sure i will be missed
Though I fear my time has come to end
I wish to linger more in peace to settle
Though they would only destroy the vessel
For this ideals that I hold will fly and spread
If I were to disappear into the night
Light a candle in by my bed
For i will have no grave in my stead

I had, I had !
An enjoyable childhood,
If not that blissful,
But wishful and cheerful.
Playing, roaming around,
Not in the playground,
For we don't have open fields
In towns, where we're sealed
To be with books even in noon
Like a worm in its cocoon.

I had, I had!
An enjoyable childhood
Amidst focus of doing good
In study, by our parents.
Lucky our parents, not getting
To witness our clothes,
While playing,
Splattered and tattered
Unlucky, my mother
Who got shattered
To see her own clothes scattered,
In the action.

I had, I had!
An enjoyable childhood
Having business
With every arrival of festivals
Delight, excite, joy, happiness
Were,in those events, the Suitable Adjectives
Wish of lengthening
The duration of holidays, festivals,
Were our Inertia.
Whilst youth spring rising up,
Tensions would follow up,
As uncompleted homework
And projects and works
Would pile up.

I had, I had!
A childhood, once,
Little, now alone in hand, I was
But for a long time ,
Depressed by fear of death,
An unavoidable fate
That would separate me
from my mother to 'Thee'

And to me, at that time
Growing up & becoming a man
Was landing myself
In the middle of a vast ocean
Full of responsibilities, duties
With no time to enjoy
And acquiring the life skills
Was Climbing the Infinite sky
So vast and wide,
And the shore of this ocean
Was the life's partner 'Death'
Who would take us all away
None of us would remain
Few of keepsakes maintained
Only the white clouds
Of varied shapes
In the azure sky
Would stay
Watching the things happened
Watching things happening
Watching that will happen.

LETS NOT SAY "I LOVE YOU"
LETS JUST PRETEND WE'RE OKAY
JUST LIE ENOUGH THAT IT BECOMES TRUTH
HIDING AND HOLDING HANDS TILL WE GO HOME
SAYING TO ALL THAT WE'RE JUST FRIENDS
THOUGH I WISH IT WAS REAL WHAT WE BOTH FELT
HOW WE LOOK INTO EACH OTHERS EYES
SEEING THAT IT DOESN'T MATTER WHO WE ARE RIGHT NOW
WE ARE MERELY SINNERS UPON THEIR EYES
THOUGH WE KISS AND SMILE WITHIN THE SHADOWS
WHISPERING WORDS MEANT FOR OTHERS  
ASHAMED OF WHAT WE DO IF CAUGHT BY THE LIGHT
YET UNTIL THE TIME IS RIGHT WILL LET THINGS END

pass not this evergreen fields,
underneath a forgotten hallow graves,
where tombstones now crumble and rot,
where stones once ethched our mortal names.

faded by time, scratched by the wind
withered by the seasons and teared by the rain,
bygone is this God's acre where nature reclaims,
once a solemn memorial now a blooming eden.

dulce suave me enseñame a valor
Busco saber mi mariposa hermosa
que tu amor sea verdadero
tan verdadero como usted colorea la vista
puedo planear con usted
a través de los campos suaves
donde las rosas florecen verdaderas
donde sus maravillosos colores por última vez revelado

We never demand it nor can we deny it
Oh the things we know and the the things we don't
Even politicians love and hate themselves
It might be heaven and it might be hell
Crocodile eyes and pigs full of lies
Oh the things they do and the things say
Just for a quick cash vote that comes from our tax everyday
Can't say i hate it neither can i love it
We stand for the right
But sit out of sight
A paradox that ends and begins and starts over once again
A record that is crooked but we still dance to its wicked tunes
As we twist and dance to our blinded doom
Faces changes but they still remain the same
Now lets do the devils dancing game
As we go ignorantly mindlessly insane

I move I breathe and I think
Therefore I know that I exist
Yet I stumble upon your field I sink
Insensible to your eyes blurred like mist...

I doubt that you'll even know me
Just a muted thinker that passes by
Skeptical like my body and soul can be
Knowing I'll just watch you fly

When the world around you crumbles,
When life finally turns to death,
When reality slowly tumbles,
And you take your final breath,

When your memory succumbs to insanity,
When sadness fades to mirth,
When you cast off your own humanity,
Madness is more than your life is worth.

how can the moon still shine being so alone
how can the midnight sky be starry bright
how can nature be silent and peaceful in tone
how can the breeze whisper so cold every night
how can the stars fall sprinkle its sparks of delight
how can the world be so peaceful on its own
how can only few see such harmonious sight
how can i sleep when faced with the nights unknown
how can some rare nights bring out the natures solemn

childish minds that still linger
peaceful times where hope rings
they still live like flaming tinder
wandering eyes that look to the light
cherish this simple things

Be mindful of the cough
Be mindful of the fever,
Dry your little tears,
Be silent, little children
For though you may be cold
And though you all may die
Do not fear, the end is near
Be happy the pain will fade,
Rest young one, Do not cry!

Disease that linger carried,
The death of a young child,
The death of a mother,
The place was quiet

Frozen are the remains that lay
Shattered broken mangled
Twisted limbs among the floor
As the rain falls over the them
The streets were left bare
The shops were cleared
The pestilence that shifts
By all that croaked or sneezed
Spreading like a gust of fire
Life be tortured till expired

Cheers to the youth whom are so Merry, so glee,
they are at the gardens of the blessed saints,
where they know not of the sorrow and painful fees,
that man has sinned like dark horrid disease.

laughter and hymns have been offered,
whilst men from the ***** think backwards,
I see no hate upon his grand rapture,
but the wolves will come to disrupt and fracture.

for we shall seek fit in the coming of the new Israel,
opening the gates of Eden and welcomed by the angels,
let us live like saints who left their earthly materials,
for the youthful children shall gather around the faithful.

as the youth ascends to the heavenly bodies above,
away from the chaos and discord of the ***** below,
for he has Shepherd his flock out of pure love,
let man see his faults before he is brought low.

There you are standing so beautifully
quietly humming a song to to the breeze
as i lay gazing till i fall soundly asleep
Feels like a scene from distant dream
just a melancholy moon kiss by the beams

Here you are standing by the edge dangerously
Dancing with the stars on the lines of infinity
all these lost past youthful memories
singing all these nostalgic strange melodies
watching you as if i may fall into eternity

Here I am within my room dazing away
looks back to you still awed by such grace
standing upon a pedestal you made for me
here you are asking me to join you in this dream
sweet smiles you offer me as though i should be free

here we are now waltzing gently to the symphonies
within our own little space, our own found galaxy
Waiting for our fate, our final eternal destiny
to which i wish to never waken cause this is ecstasy
but i know this only a dream a surreal ambivalent dream

They spoke of honor, faith, and pride
My dear friend may it, my brother
This conflict has bleached its shine
Resilient we both are resolute to the end
Though we stand in opposite ground
Though our colors standard stand different

By breath of the breeze they flutter
To the land they impale our mother
This land now broken that cries to unite
We are all its gallant sons and daughters
Undaunted when called to the task
No matter the price and labor it shall be paid

Though our guns face in defense
Yet always in clashing tragic conflict
Aggressors and traitors, claimed foe we yell
Though a lie we know hidden well
In both we serve to protect our mother
To each we understand and know
That someday we too would falter and fall

What are we both fighting for?
What do all this shameless struggle be
Two brothers now tossed and torn
Two brothers dressed in different tattered garb
Anointed stains of red and black
As we both cry and feel the sharp bitter agony

But with all this said and done
I salute you so my dear brother
As I salute my fallen mangled own
I bow and kneel in fatigue and torment
Knowing we have shown great valor
Shattered flesh that once had lived

We all have endured equally
In this harsh vigorous tainted field
You had fought hard as I
With tears that flow I try to hold
I carry both burdens my own and yours
Buried together with same guarded honor

To hear the wailing sympathetic mourns
Melancholy hovers and fills the air with grief
You are Judas you are Lucifer you are Cain
Yet i have honored you and not slandered your body
Neither talked scorned or ill of your name
I have loved you though i have not known you

My dear brothers you all remain at rest in silence
Peace has arrived to rob your suffering away
I shall live and stand steward upon your tombs
Solemn will be the days when I lay down my arms
Patience that ages and fades in my drowning temple
You shall not be wayward lost for you are finally home

Sentinels of dreams, vanguard of centuries
Your acts be given as providence resides upon us
Watch over us all my dear fallen brothers and sisters
Intervene through your spirits that echoes eternally
Hail to the provider the giver of life to whom we trust
As we march and conquer this murky transparent soul

What if there was never a next time
Then where would you take this rhyme
What if that night was the last chance
Now depressed you wish "you took his offer to dance"

Because life is unpredictable and nothing is true
But when it's your time you can't avoid when you're due
But don't be afraid every day is your last.
Just next time go in for a hug, don't pull away so fast.

a mesmerizing radiance that made me wonder
seeing the same twilight sky makes me think
our hearts are seeing the same unlikely glow too

Seeds of man that shall one day grow,
Let it blossom once more the flowers of youth,
The spring of enlightened breeze that blow,
Through the garden of hope, fertilized by truth,
Upon a land that has been set a blaze,
A nation that burns bright as hell fire,
The sufferings of this people for years and days,
For the system that cares nothing but selfish desire,
Yet the common man may not come to see,
To feel the fresh air of liberties breeze,
Time will pass again to the land in chains,
exposing the wolves that have reign,
till then we strive forward as our fathers did,
opening our eyes from the lies we've seen,
until the sun rises high we shall be rid,
the cancer of societies dark veil of evil sins,
Once we have been cleansed by waters of truth,
We shall once again bare the fruits of our labor,
Whereas are bond is strongly entwined as root,
we shall grow together strong for we have been delivered.

To be honest
I can't believe we actually exist sometimes
Look around you
Our history is so tainted with blood and lies
such unforgiving sin that we forget so easily by
We have enslaved each and one another
all in the name of being better than the other

It's pure madness
We've fought against each other
Killing our own race, our own brother
Without a second to spare

It's scares me sometimes and honestly
If the planet could only speak
It would want us all to listen
Listen to it as it pleas us to work together
To end this cycle of pain and suffering
Before we all disappear entirely

the sad thing is the universe above us
with all the stars and galaxies won't even notice at all
if we suddenly disappear into the darkness of the abyss
We our a tiny smudge hidden in the universes mist
That in all of universal history we are closer to the fall

I even battle with my own existence and realize
that it's just utter MADNESS...

The voice of true men stand in stifle
Through the flash and thunderous roar of guns
Their steel shined arms be the charm of rifles
Bleeding onward charging hordes that rush

True lionhearted brothers took to the field
Who undaunted as they answered the call
Sons and guards of liberty who never yield
Tall and wavering yet strong as a stonewall

Mustered men in hasty unfazed motion
Colors leading high touch by the light
Rising spirits filled with helm of devotion
Through the battle torn horrid sight

Plunge to the purging blaze of battle
Battle cries that ring loud through the abyss
The strength of mortal men's stalwart fate
As the rifle crack and the bullet hiss

Boys filled pale with fright and panic flight
Where the butchered slaughter swells
Avenging swords clash in mid-fight
Frenzied fierce glory as stout martyrs fell

Blurred haze of men in agonizing struggle
Wave of entangled brazen bodies
Wailing and mourning they rustle over
blazing fire that rages that never cease

Till the grave of the valiant have fallen
May they rise to the Lord of Hosts
Till final judgement be given solemn
To we who endure give you your last toast

Our generation will be known for nothing.
Never will anybody say,
We were the peak of mankind.
That is wrong, the truth is
Our generation was a failure.
Thinking that
We actually succeeded
Is a waste. And we know
Living only for money and power
Is the way to go.
Being loving, respectful, and kind
Is a dumb thing to do.
Forgetting about that time,
Will not be easy, but we will try.
Changing our world for the better
Is something we never did.
Giving up
Was how we handled our problems.
Working hard
Was a joke.
We knew that
People thought we couldn’t come back
That might be true,
Unless we turn things around

conflagration that light the evening sky
crackling smoldering moans and laughter
two flames that dances in a  wild swirl
embers that glows bright as the star
blazing burning in sweet sinful desire
such internal inferno that slowly grows

what can i say to the beauty that is the morning dawn
the one that lights the sky and chases the night away

Sometimes holding you is harder than letting go,
Sometimes watching you  is better than talking to you,
Sometimes it's better that we never took pictures to show,
Sometimes I should have been more realistic as I grew,
Sometimes it's fine to sit apart from you than by your side,
Sometimes I still wonder why and how we met up anyway,
Sometimes I think I loved you in the past like a sweet cyanide,
Sometimes it's better we burn the memories we had that day,

I would rather be on my lonesome watching the sky turn gray,
I won't shed a tear for what I lost nor rejoice for what I gain,
Cause I know I loved you but that was just another yesterday.

winter won't last too long
till the snow melts and ice cracks
as the sun shines its warmth
and the trees bear leaves,
the flowers blooms once more,
and as the first birds return home
spring shall come quite soon
this cold will fade by its coming warmth
and as the season change so will you

Time has passed and doubts that grew each day
Yet past memories seem to slowly fade away
Still, I remember it vividly as if it was yesterday
Hoping that nothing has ever changed I pray

till we meet again till i see that sweet petulant smile
when the warm summers breeze brushes against your hair
I hope your kindred heart stays even for a while
until our conversations filled the fresh open air

I wish there was any time in this world for us
but I know you'll leave us forgotten in dust
so smile again my dear lady for the future looks bright
don"t look back it is okay to let go
you're in such wondrous height

Don't you harden your heart,
don't you walk away,
Don't you hide from the sins you made,
Cause we're here too help you change

Don't you act like your strong,
Don't you act like you care nothing at all,
We are here to hold onto you,
so don't you dare let go

Cause when the storm rages and you lose all control,
We are here if you need a home
so take my hand it won't be too long

The thoughts are prodding within my mind
Constantly attacking.
Desiring.
Wishing.
I try not to think about it,
But my mind just can't get enough of it
My mind always seems to wonder towards the same thing...
Over and over again, a cycle of endless thoughts.
Feeling the feelings welling up
Knowing that i am unable to escape

Obsession.
It feels as though i am obsessed with it.
My fingers tingle, almost begging for more
Like a drug, i take my thoughts
And i allow them to overtake me
For a moment, it can almost be euphoria
Filled with regret and pain, but also happiness and buzzing

Trying to stop these thoughts
Trying to stop them from entering my head
Trying to let go of that obsession

Can one be obsessed with multiple things at once?
With multiple thoughts and feelings, unable to let go
To quit them like cold turkey.

Money does not bound me to quit
Its all in my head...
Its not an addiction like the drugs you buy
I don't go to someone else to strive for it
To bargain and beg for more
It feels different than that

The feelings can be so overwhelming
Only knowing those feelings in that moment
Wanting it back, even listening
Because for a moment...
The mind didn't drift.
It only wanted its obsession
It was completely focused on that obsession

I could be obsessed with sadness
Feeling the water drifting down my face
Thinking of the things happening in my life
Addicted to the sting of pain it gives me
Addicted to almost wanting to be alone
Addicted to the way the muscles on my face moving down, the smile almost hurting my face

I could be obsessed with joy
Feeling the laughter erupting from my mouth
Making hard to breath, an almost sweet pain coming over my chest
My heart rushing
My head numb from no air
And then able to calm down,
Obsessed with the feeling that happened in a moment
When nothing was in my mind but that joy

I could be obsessed with anger
Feeling the warm, boiling feeling overcome me
Allowing it to burst out
Raising my voice so that i know others can hear me
The look on their faces when i know they are listening
Because it seems like no one is listening unless i raise my voice and let it all out
It can be addicting, allowing that feeling to overtake you

It might be easier if i was obsessed with an object...
Then maybe then...
I could let it drop.
Let go of my obsession.
Allowing it to break into a million pieces.
Feeling all the negative feelings at once, causing me to fall onto the ground, my mind regretting it
My mind wanting it back so bad my heart aches
And then relieve can come over me
Maybe it will take a long time for relieve to come,
Or I would become 'Obsessed' with that feeling

Is it possible to be obsessed with a person?
Or perhaps i am obsessed with the feelings that come with them?
Feeling the tingling and the warmth when they are nearby
Feeling my breath hitch when i hear their voice
Addicted to those feelings
That desire can overtake someone so easily
The desire to be around that person
Obsessed with their everything
It can be as quick as the snapping of the fingers
Addiction to the obsession inevitable
One moment you are normal and like them...
And the next moment, obsession can overtake you

Obsession can almost be a breaking point
Our minds are constantly buzzing
Absorbing new information
But we can come to that point...
When our minds 'break' and we become addicted
When we become obsessed,
And desire nothing else but that feeling that we are obsessed with

I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
I don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow

I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
By becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

Can't you see that you're smothering me?
Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control
'Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow
And every second I waste is more than I can take!

I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
By becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

And I know I may end up failing too
But I know you were just like me with someone disappointed in you

I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
By becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
I'm tired of being what you want me to be

tie yourself with a rope
life brings broken hope
always little open scope
such painful wounds I cope

Believe me when I say ‘You are alone’
I feel the shivering cold in my bone
Express your feelings within my own

Full of debt
Never properly slept
Always sadly wept
Wish I had something
Yet stolen treasures that once kept
I am unsuccessful, a failure... I am ******

You'll push me to continue the strife
While you'll steal the air i breath
And use it for your own little greed
You'll strangle and choke me till i'm white
Praying to persist for both your peace

You'll personally take me to my grave
Just you watch as i fade
You may say we're blood
But the thought just makes my blood boil

o sweet cold embrace of the abyss
lovely is your darkening kiss
you oblivion paradise always on my mind,
Body cold and stiff, now my pain I've left behind
eternal slumber I wait your sing call

I'm escaping all of the harm
And giving myself to you
so please accept me with open arms

It feels as though the world is too slow or too fast
that some good things will likely never last
yet the memories we built both great and sad
I hang them all up my wall, no mater how long time has pass
each one brings back stories from such glorious days
if you can see them now I bet it will brings tears down your lovely face
no matter how much we've grown old nothing has truly age
everything still stays the same no matter how somethings change

to the light that shines now lost
to the life that once lived at a cost
to the wine that sobers the heart

I'm but a mere humble soldier
my heart is tied to my motherland
I fight for freedom whilst I forfeit my life
as I run upon the field of death

I do not stand alone in the smog
I do not run against my fate
for the angels guide me
I fight for my honor to which i am unworthy

I do not walk unknowingly
the all this risks I understand
for the lord ventures with me,
each and every day

If the day comes that I fall
I surrender my soul to his warm embrace
remember me not just by name
but the deeds I've done and the sacrifice I gave

I'm a soldier first and foremost
A son of the nation I was born
A friend to all peoples
A comrade of peace and order
A brother to my fellow servicemen
A fierce and honorable warrior
and a servant till the end of my breath
and of my beating heart

can I not be true to myself
without breaking apart
can I genuinely smile
without feeling so empty
why can't I just be normal
like everyone around me

if you ask why i don't sleep
it is because its hard to leave
the sweet things of today
and face the fears of tomorrow

you saw her smile glow so bright
you stare in such daze and delight
my heart that sings a beat aloud:
you lover her, you do
as she passes among the crowd
fills your soul with such blaze
such a sight to be praised
yet it's not enough, it was never enough.
you are allowed to watch her go
to see her off with the shadows alone
this are but illusions a trick of the mind,
as the sun devoured her away
to count the constellations
upon her wandering eyes
as they slowly fade out in a single day
for the tragedy was that
you were too late
for you have lost her

if you delay me justice
you have denied me justice

Silently I pray
To a God
That assures me
As he is Silent

I see gentle waters and silence
more dangerous than those disturb
it is often the quiet that brings out the terror
the anxiety that drowns as in anticipation
of our own despair and unknowing sorrows
even if I drift and float by the safe shores
Its wave will carry me away to the depths
even if I struggle I will eventually sink