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out of the mouths of conservative gals
who hate their lives. So, they find someone
to tear apart, piece by piece. It’s become their art. You

will find me in words of a poem. It’s my secret hide-away,
black on white, Times New Roman. You could learn
something if you get between the spaces. You will

find me before the antebellum, in school-yard nosebleeds
broken ***** and garage band singers, bell-bottom pants and
butterfingers, chubby thighs and cellulite. You will find

me after the break, when hair has thinned, but belly
bloated. Drinking wine and eating cartons of Rocky road, watching
reruns in my pajamas.  You will find me

when it rains. You’ll smell the ocean and feel
my pain. But do not cry a single tear. Sing my song and
you will dance because I did what I wanted to do.
 Jun 2017 Gavin Barnard
Neex
Hi,
Well as it turns out,
You still live in my heart.

I begged you to move out,
Yet all you do is jump in,
Then out,
Then in.

You make me feel things,
They won't go away,
They hunt my eyes at night,
They scare me to tears.

In your presence,
I miss you.

I miss the sweet,
Sweet release you gave me.

I crave to hear more,
All the things you feel,
How do I make you feel?
This book is never going to end, is it? And I don't want it to. You give me something to feel.
 Jun 2017 Gavin Barnard
Traveler
Relax
And just breathe
I wasn't really
Going to leave
Tomorrows come
And love forgives
Besides, I have no
Where else to live
And in these days
Of reasonable doubts
Of who we are
Despite ourselves
I'll still be here
In words that rhyme
Trying my hardest
To make you mine
................
....
Traveler Tim
 May 2017 Gavin Barnard
Lost
Have you ever had a love so wrong that its not?
What about a friend, so ugly that they're hot?
I won't deny it,
I don't feel this way a lot.
Maybe I'll make an exception...

I hate you're far away, but I don't wish you were here.
I want to hear your voice, but don't whisper in my ear.
I swore I wouldn't drink, but god I need a beer.
I think I'll make an exception...

Wish I was on your mind, but please don't think of me.
Want you around all the time, but please just leave me be.
My heart's been welded shut, but girl you have the key.
You might be my exception...
Be my exception
 Apr 2017 Gavin Barnard
Dovey
These one-shot wounds are piling up
Hit me again, one bullet’s not enough
Don’t stop firing till we’re corpses walking
Measly hateful human bodies rotting


My lashing tongue goads you into the fight
Broken bodies fighting for bruised pride
Burning tears are your only defense
And beautiful make-up to hide battered flesh

Meanwhile, I’ll wear a costume made of words
To hide the melted plastic burns
We can both easily lie to a world of fools
At least, until the next uncivilized duel
I know that every single fight is my fault. Every wound is my fault.
Unicorn sprinkles,
Daffodils jam,
A little star's twinkle
And some dragon ham.

Some emerald clovers,
A pint of fairy dust,
A handful of stover
And some canned gust.

Teardrops of a Selkie,
Well shaken, not stirred,
The horseshoe of a kelpie,
Late Iron Age sherds.

Some fizzy witchcraft,
One bottle or two,
And maybe a draught
Of love potion too.
Someone challenged me to add my shopping list in here and to have it called a poem. I think they had no idea what they were asking of me, so... here is my shopping list. Enjoy!
It's fancy meeting you here
I say as if I haven't been
Planning this run in for weeks.
And you give me
A smile in passing,
As you join the girl
You always prefered.
And I say it's okay,
And I scream it's okay,
To myself more so than to anyone else.
Because who am I
To dare
That you could ever
Love me again
After the way
I left you?
So before you go,
I just want to say,
You were my biggest mistake.
Not because you tried,
But because I walked away.
I recall all the attempts you made.
You wanted to fix my world,
Save a scared little girl,
And I threw you out.
I threw you away
Before with opened eyes
I realized
I needed you to stay.
No one else has ever looked at me --
Not the way you used to.
So it's funny,
Running into you here,
When I've been running
For all of these years.
You and the kids look so happy. I'll call you if I ever go back to Virginia.
I've been singing songs about you,
Though you'll never hear them.
I've been writing poetry about you,
Though you'll never read them.
I've been painting pictures of you,
Though you'll never see them...
Just like you never saw me falling,
So you weren't able to catch me.
I'm the only one falling.
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