I look forward to waking up at 3 am now
And the long walk
Across muddy fields
Amidst overgrown grass
Alone on the deserted road
Your thoughts give me company

Will You be there today, I wonder….
The moon shines above amidst the clouds
Dark shadows play hide and seek with the light
Just as You with me

I try to steal fleeting sidelong glances
Half hoping that You wont’t notice
And half, that You might !

I’m not even sure why I look in Your direction
What exactly am I looking for ?
Why is it so comforting to find You
Always there.. I am so proud of you.. It inspires me so much !

I try to even stop my heart from beating too loud
Just so that I can listen to you
Chanting ever so softly
I pray
And I look away

But the restlessness inside me
Sweeps my thoughts right back across to You
No matter how I coax and cajole my mind
Its like struggling to swim upstream in the waters of the Ganga

I’ve tried
To rationalise
And philosophise
And demonise
And to swim and to drown the feelings away

But it’s no use pretending anymore

I’ve begun to like green
And black
And bracelets
And thumb rings

Wajah bewajah
bina baat hi kabhi bas,
log rootha kyu karte hain ?

Kyu
apni hi ummeedon ke tang jaal mein
din raat,
yun hi ghuta karte hain ?

Jaane anjaane
hum  “humare” “apno” se
wada jhootha kyu karte hain ?

Zindagi ki daud dhoop mein
kuch saathi bante hain
toh kuch
choota kyu karte hain ?

Dilon ke rishte
Aksar toota kyu karte Hain ?

Yeh roothne manane ka akhir silsila kya hai
Kai baar mile aur bichad gaye
Bhala majra kya hai ?

Iss banne aur sawarne ki
Iss tootne bikharne ki
Aakhir dawa bhi kya hai ?

Hey Nath,
Yeh das tumhare charano mein
Gira hua hai pooch raha
Mera dil hi kahin behaya kya hai
Ya paap ka ghada shaayad bhar gaya hai

Iss bhava bandhan mein phansa  hua
Meri karun pukaar suno
Kukarmo ke daldal mein dhansa hua
Kar raha chitkaar suno
Davagni mein jal raha
Bheesan hahakaar suno

Daya karo ab hey Bhagvan
Ya ban Narsingh sanhaar karo
Aap ki sharan mein ab yeh dushtt
Iss neech ka uddhar karo

Common folks trembling at sore throats
Doctors working in raincoats
Presidents looking for scapegoats
Governments promising treasury notes, ventilators
vaccines and retribution
All in exchange for a fistful of votes
Human decency is certainly diseased
invalid, obsolete.

The poor and the wretched are hungry
The über rich worried about “industry”
TV channels scream “conspiracy”
Dictators helm “democracy”
Mankind’s collective descend into insanity
seems painfully complete.

The mask that I put on
is but a manifestation
of the one I’ve been wearing all along
Just that others can see it clearly now

Standing in que
Desperately buying toilet paper to wipe away their anxiety
The fear of the uncertain and the unknown
Sticks to them with industrial strength glue
Welcome to the milieu

Every golden verse that could have
Sang your praise
Didn’t.

Every eloquent prose that would have
Described your glories
Didn’t.

Every stroke of the brush that should have
Painted your form
Didn’t

Now life has come to an end, and it was all for nought.

All the feelings
that she kept storing so carefully
in a jar
far from anyone's reach
covered tight with a lid
kept hidden in a dark corner,
cracked.
Now sadness leaks out of it.