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1d · 28
TaMMat 1
terima kasih kepada semua bintang
dari seawal minggu interim
hingga teater
ke fotografi media
dan perkad.
terima kasih
jangan jumpa lagi haha
you always on your phone
I thought you were playing game
all those eye contact was non rare
I was in cloud nine alone
ofcourse someone beautiful like you
must have gotten somebody :")
semua orang kata jangan
tapi aku berkenan
perangai buruk takut ikut gian
tapi semua cuma kesian
hari khamis selalu
tinggi tinggi merdu
4d · 41
2am shower
Enjoying my time alone
until space beside me occupied
she played a familiar playlist
all the songs I know the lyrics
three times sneezing
but the water was not even freezing
I let her return first
so, I won't see her red eyes and nose.
I felt her
I was there
using shower time to cry
rupanya kamu terluka
walaupun ketika bersama aku
kalau tidak
mengapa lagu itu kamu nyanyi selalu?
lagu itu baru aku dengar
rupanya lirik mereka tajam berlaka
empty mind search emojis idea
from brown sugar to honey
polar bear until bee

I've described all my men
with all those aesthetic metaphor
all those living and permanent things

yet
ofcourse just yet
none of them
lovely and perpetual
5 feet 7 tall
with glasses he let his hair down
deep yet sweet he sound
just like you
that is all I know
does he into photography too?
does he will end up leaving too?
just like you
but all I know is
that I will not be trying this time
because never is better than was once
- one-sided always better than break-up
jarang sekali aku bersyukur
menyalahkan rezeki itu hobi
aku lebih baik kini
tidak pula aku terhutang budi.
sahabat di sini lebih ikhlas
tidak lagi aku rasa terpinggir

tenaga kerja di sini tidak kasar
semua baik layan aku seolah tidak besar

aku suka semuanya
sayang sekali sedar bila sudah mahu berarak
I know you gave up on me everyday
no more rules you just let me play
got thousands blessing to be grateful
but all I do is complain.

wrote about everything except your deeds
I am now in better sheets
somehow my favourite are those freaks
atleast I did not quit.

All I care about is having a lover
spends my years believing 5 leaf clover
barely think to bring god closer
but I hope I am still able.
I know I never write about you
but I only write about what's hurt
and you never close to hurt me.
sayang dengarlah
aku sedih
benar benar sedih

aku ingat lagi
mengira bintang atas langit
sambil kita berbual

malam ini tiada bintang
dan
suara kamu tidak lagi aku hafal.
seolah oleh ditertawakan matahari
mereka merai saat hadinya kamu
bersinar dan menawan

lepasnya kamu akan tangan ku
langit juga sunyi dan gelap sekali
kecewa dan kembali sedia kala.
gave up three times
he crawled back four
you made him a man
but it was me he praises of

every night filled the tub with tears
but he's with me with no fear

oh strong woman
do not be sad
please don't

if this poem reaches you
I hope he did too
also random
Dec 2 · 36
12/2
I've walked with the girls
laugh with the boys
but most of the time
walking with the idea of you satisfied me the most
random
aku tahu ada yang mahu
tapi kurang berani diri

mereka diam diam menunggu
dan biar aku tenggelam sepi.

setelah pudar rasa
mereka lebih rela aku menyendiri.
"berhenti puisi kalau nak orang mahu"
"berhenti menulis pasal tak pasti kalau tak mahu dia pergi"
"kalau terus berduka, sendirilah sampai tua"
Dec 1 · 54
Moon
"have you found someone?"
he asked
"do we have two moon?"
I answered
men after you are just stars
so that my dark sky won't be lonely
but you
you're a moon that I need.
Nov 30 · 42
aftertaste
Morning without a text
night without a call
are you coming back?
'cause i'm starting to fall
I miss you
puisi paling hina itu
ialah
yang ditulis untuk lain
tapi dicerca oleh yang lain.
aku ada taman bunga
dan dalam taman bunga
mustahil kumbang nya satu.
Nov 28 · 129
Goodnight
you love me better at night
you treat me right

you love me better at night
you made me not to start a fight

you love me better at night
in that case let just talk during only dark sky.
just like
one night stand through phone
we talk at night
and you forgot me during the day.
and we start over again and again
Nov 28 · 50
Butterfly
my lover is a butterfly
sometimes makes me cry

my love is a butterfly
too beautiful but easily die

my lover is a butterfly
I regret out first 'hi'.
happy 3
Nov 28 · 19
Easy Love
I opened the door so easily
without realising I was begging on my knees
for something I can get for free.
I'm always searching for a new company

someone who will ask about my favourite poem
care enough about my favorite books

someone who's willing to wait me done eating
patient enough to understand broken side of me.

someone who's truly in love with me
offer me something evergreen.
Nov 26 · 435
stars joke
I told him about the stars
he said I was one of them

few years apart
a new man told me the same

how funny, that all the stars remain
but they all left.
Nov 26 · 37
tidak pernah aku rasa
jadikan aku watak utama
terangkan cahaya fokus pada aku
mesin hitam merakam hanya gerak aku

jadikan aku bunga
disiram bukan hanya tiga hari pertama
tapi dijaga hingga mekar berwarna

jadikan aku milikmu
belailah aku dengan kasih sayang
cinta yang kekal walau bersama umum.
Nov 25 · 56
three stars in a line
if you could lay on my chest
on the night grass
with nothing to worry about

come with me stargazing
anything above
and those three stars in a line
when I was younger probably like ten
I used to admire those stars
I started to think that it was me and both my parents
I got busy and it was always raining
until last night I was able to stargazing again
now I'm eighteen
still admire the same stars and missing my family.
I was not an athlete
my feets never touch the stage
never hold any medal
useless

then I try to cope
writing poetry and capturing sunsets
yet my words gain no proud
and my photographs are all hidden
I blame all to my misery
but It was me and still me
who's afraid of changing
Nov 23 · 100
notoriously naive
black and white
a fighter and a lost boy
thick and thin
older and too old

I tasted them all
do not make my naive attitude fool you
I cry I do
also had fun .. I do
again and again
Nov 22 · 124
Ril#10
biar aku terbiar di tepi jalan beralaskan kotak usang dan bersarapan air hujan
pasti malamnya aku mimpikan kamu
biar aku bina istana di atas puncak berenang dalam kolam emas
masih juga aku akan fikirkan kamu.

aku menulis bukan meminta balasan
hanya sekadar mahu engkau tahu.. aku masih sama.
dua pucuk surat tanpa alamat buat kamu .. harapnya kamu tahu
aku akan selamanya di sini,.
Nov 19 · 166
Helang
terbang bebas tinggi pencawang
guruh berdentum tidak sembunyi
lambang negara lambang tajam
mahu aku megah sepertimu
pengecut
Nov 19 · 109
500 Days Of Summer
Just like a scene in the movie..
you approach me
where all the books sleep
in the corner where most students forget
I was on my tenth page
you said
"I love poems too"
"Lang Leav's are my favorite"
you smiled and left.
- "I said I love The Smiths. You have good taste in music"
-"You like The Smiths?"
-" To die by your side is such a heavenly way to die. Love it."
Nov 19 · 80
my time will come too?
I wish for you.

Things might not turn around
maybe I will lost my job after a week
and even starving for three days

But, still I can say.. proudly
"Atleast, my beautiful man is with me"...
-enough with having you ... worst day become best..
If I want you
there's no amount of rejection will make me give up

If I want you
notorious I will be, blood in my eyes still trying.

But baby, If i don't want you
I left
easily.
please do not think I miss you
because if I do
I'll never leave you
my soul crave your energy
an empty space between my legs
for you

naked body, I saw poetry
no ring I'm safe
as tender as the steak on our weekends family dinner

as soft as my pillow on the school morning

as warm as 6 pm beach sand while walking towards the sunset

brown like a sweet caramel dropped on vanilla ice cream
the way you looked at me
Nov 15 · 64
Ril#9
berani mereka mentertewakan aku kerana masih menyimpan harapan sedangkan cinta yang ditawar mereka tidak sesuku pun seperti kamu.
lelaki lelaki ini tidak sedar diri
mereke fikir mereka layak
Nov 14 · 82
player with feelings
hit and run
wasted weekends
different men
different cars
oh. I'm having fun.
all of them in
none of them stay
Nov 13 · 267
nicotine or me?
he got this basic name
almost every parents had that.

cute face decent personality
suddenly offered me a hand.

his breath suffocate me
grey monoxide from his lungs.

cancer stick on his left hand
dark lips talking sweets.

so I ran.
like always.
no honey
I don't need to die young
take me to the beach and art gallery
let me hear the ocean speak and color sings.

trekking until the top of the mountain and scream as loud as the falls.

what is cinema darling?  and a mall?  
I'm an art
treat me like it.
no need fancy
no need basic
give me rare
give me pure
Nov 8 · 120
thank God he's gone.
he offered the sun and the sea
if it was so perfect why couldn't she see

broken heart still not heal
he's adding another misery

wasted times and dark voices to ****
of course he's innocent and free.
he hurts you but he acts like it was him who's hurting
blue frozen beverages from convenient store
we both don't need to get out the car
windows down, wind gently playing your hair
we both love it that way
cheap date
cute date
apa yang aku tulis
berhentilah kau baca
apa yang aku rasa
cukuplah kau kisah

nombor sudah kau buang
jangan lagi kau pulang
tiada lagi tangisan
tinggal benci
If you read all my poems
will you promise me
that you will not make me
write the same thing about you too?
come here to heal
come here to stay
Nov 6 · 76
you should've known
I'm unstable baby
fragile it was
manipulate it is

I'm crazy baby
all my men portraits on the wall
and you're not even top 20

you did not make me happy
you make me less sad
thank you maybe?
offer me the worst
and I'll still put you first
ease and independent
small dandelions flew through the wind

came a cute cute bee
offering honey and everything was sweet

not even a week, dandelion slowly lost its magic
bee understand not. Just left

blamed on their differences
cute cute bee flew away
dandelion return flying through the wind again.
Nov 6 · 42
Ril#8
dia bekerja
waktu aku dibuai mimpi

tiga pagi dia bertasbih
sedang aku karang puisi

dalam kereta dia tiada lagu barat
koleksi lagu aku semua memudarat
entah mengapa aku rasa aku layak
entah mengapa aku masih salahkan takdir
Nov 5 · 59
I Loved You.
My bad
I wasn't a good company
so you left after 6 days
and made you think I wasn't even trying.

My fault
I let you in so easily
ignored the signs and disobey my friends
just to give you all of me.

My regret
I failed to fill my words with love
even all of that is more than what you deserve
so you repay with some hurtful poems.

I'm sorry
I was so ignorant
I let you be the one who's hurting
even I am the one who spent an hour in shower crying.
I hold no grudges, I forgive you.
and no longer hear anything from you.
Nov 5 · 291
I'll take the blame
you know I can write you hurtful poem
tell them all the fling and games you played
but I forgive you
I understand you, and I will take the blame
I am now seeking for a healthier me
I will let you live.
I pray the best for you
29 tahun kamu hidup tanpa kasih
tidak pernah aku lihat kamu mengeluh letih
hanya terus berdoa kepadaNya masih

sejadah usam lama tidak menyentuh dahi
sedangkan Dialah yang memegang jawapan pasti
tanpa agama hidup pasti tidak beerti

tibanya masa aku kembali dan berhenti menjauh
kapal mewah yang lama berlayar juga perlu melabuhkan sauh
sesungguhnya tuhan tidak menguji lebih yang aku mampu tempuh.
-Biarlah aku redho dan terus berdoa
nasib aku dan kamu aku lepaskan kepada yang maha Esa.
dalam mimpi
aku mahu ke dalam tasik lama
hingga timbul tanpa nyawa

dalam mimpi
aku gantung tali di siling
sehingga kerusi jatuh terbaring

dalam mimpi
kereta aku isikan karbon monoksida
lalu aku tidur tidak jaga jaga
Nov 4 · 38
This is for me II
For a woman who love it all
you never lose anything.
your intention was pure
and for you it mean something.

For a woman who love it all
you are not easy.
just because you gave them chances and they broke it wholeheartedly.

For a woman who love it all
your tears never meant cheap.
you're healing
and if crying heals you, then cry
cry yourself to sleep.
feeling myself
Nov 4 · 103
This is for me I
All my poems sang about pain
how my petals fell and faint
how I have drown in the rain
and how I was dying far from saint.

but I never mention about me
I have grown as a strong pine tree
I have made the ocean split and free
and how I'm still living after all those misery.
Nov 3 · 64
dulu sampai sekarang
lambat laut aku akan lupakan nama kamu jua
tarikh lahir kamu juga pasti sekali
tapi wangianmu
wangian itu pasti kekal.
aku tidak pernah lupakan wangian sesiapapun.
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