You could put a crown of fallen diamonds on my head,
And jewels on my hips
But animals would still run from me
And wisps would curse me.
                           You can’t hide the impurity of a soul.

when
will it be
okay

to be human?

when
will skin be

beautiful?

when
will we
be able to

breathe?

I was reading this book
Was it an illusion?
I was drawn like a magnet;
I couldn not stop reading
I was bound to finish sometime
but
there was a problem
with the Quantum

a father is suppose to be a child’s first
hero
protector
guider
and mentor
however for me my father was my first
tormentor
narcissist
and the monster that hid under my bed
with a bottle to keep him company

He packed up his clothes into his bag, she came in their room and she was confused, "Where are you going?"
He looked down, "Somewhere else,"
She cried, "But why? Why did you leave?"
He grabbed her by the cheeks, wiped her tears and said, "I think I just can't do this anymore, I can't stay no more, I can't have a deal with you,"
"Deal with me?"
He exhaled slowly, "You know what?"

"You can't just tell people to go away and then ask them to get back,
You can't just throw away the love that people gave to you and ask for another one,
You can't just speak 'I don't wanna lose you' and then you treat me like an option,
You can't just say 'I love you' to me and the next second you ignored me like I was nothing to you,"

"But-"

He shaked his head, "But what? You wanna say 'I love you' and make me feel guilty? You wanna say 'I'm sorry' like it will change everything? I can't do this anymore. I don't wanna see you suffer, but you made me suffer. I'm done with this, I'm sorry."

And after that, he brought his bag and left her crying in the corner of their--her room.

Her smile for my best friend
was my pain.