Can I cradle your heart
Against mine?
Carry it with me
When I run in circles?
I'll hold it close
Is it big enough
To share?
It just might
Break my fall
When I trip
On my own feet
...
But
I dont want to hurt you
So here I am
To return your heart
Because
I will always run in
Circles
I will never learn

I want to walk
With this sky
It talks to me
Enveloping my heart
Giving me hope
By the time I'm free
It will be gone
And altogether
Different
With it's darkness
Not speaking
In the quiet
Stars

Had a great idea for a poem
Fell asleep and it turned into a dream
Wish I had written it down
Or at least jotted a note
Posting my dreams
Here
Won't work
It's hard to
Write you
As a font

Our scent of
Nostalgia
Would be a
Best seller
Let's
Get a degree
In chemistry
And craft
A masterpiece

The perpetual state
Of heart break
Never heals
It just learns
To deal

I will bloom for you
If you wait
And take care of me
It will be worth it
I may only show you
A little at a time
For fear you may hurt
My petals
But wait
And cherish me
I'll full bloom
From the love

Does the one you adore
Feel like home?
Do they sound
Like home?
How you think
Home
Should be.
True it's
Easy to say
Just go home...
Harder
If the feeling is
Alone

I was in love
With a moment in time
And it broke my heart
Over and over
It left,
Returned,
Left again
Why do you torment me?
It was about to answer
Then
It was gone

I drove all over
Looking for a memory
A feel that I needed to feel again
I went at the right time
The right place
The same sunlight, same street, trees
I couldn't find it
All I found were tears
My world has changed
Too much

Your dark oxygen
Penetrates a depth
I do not want to know
Keeping a mystery alive..

But not me

I don't like the middle
It feels like an ocean
Swimming it everyday
I want to be close to the shore
Where you are
Where I can at least see you
Hear you
The middle feels almost like
Drowning
You are too far
To help me get thru
Or throw me a lifeline
Reassure me
So
I can at least float
To your shore

I miss you
But I don't know why
I don't even know who
You are
Or where you are
Theres a void
I cannot find the peace
The missing piece
I can feel it getting closer
But it's still not fitting
Maybe it's the disconnecting
Dream I had
A man with a baby
He left me
To care for his baby
Now I miss you
And I don't know who you were
Just a man
An unknown man

Someone you love
May never touch you
Someone you love
May never hurt you

Both can be
Achieved
With words

And it is
Usually
From
Someone
You love

I'll never forget
The look you gave
As
I told you something good  
You looked safely lost
With a thought provoking gaze
Deep into my soul
No smile
Just a kind softness 
To a wandering thought
Maybe just absorbing what I said
 Saying nothing
Just looking
Were you day dreaming?
Did you even hear me?
Your beautiful eyes
Shook a nerve
A pleasant one
Having to look down
At what I was reading
I left the mutual gaze prematurely  
Maybe it meant nothing
Maybe it meant everything
This is the conundrum

You are that boy
I showed up to school for
The one who never knew
What he meant
To me
Wanting to be wanted
Just in case
He looked up
But never did
Still...
I always think
About him
His essence
Follows you around
The way I do

I need
A little something
Every
Day
Just something small
A word
A smile
A share
And
It will be enough
Because
It's from you

I knew you'd change our lives
My life
A mother's life
The young handsome man
Taking care of her
Taking care of us
His family loved us
Giving us more family
New babies
Never realizing the impact
Until now
The happiness
The safety
Being loved by a new dad
To replace one I never knew
I knew you'd change our lives
And you did...

Because you left

Those comfort memories
The ones I count on
That
Crawl their way into
My mind and heart
The
Ones I'm most
Fond of
Are those days
The sun was going down
Beaming good night
Crispy apple air
Veil of warmth
And spice
While
Fawning
Over you
Looking out
My car window
Waiting
For something
Different
I know you are
Just  
A daydream
I need to forget

I spoke your language
With you,
I tried,
But meaning was lost
Meaning was everything
And yet became nothing
I can't speak
Your language
Anymore
It's a choice
You made
Long ago
By fracturing
My abilities
To understand
You

There is no why
For now
Only goodbye...
For now

In a world
That makes no sense
I feel like a book
I don't understand
Language is foreign
My chapters incoherent
Mixed up
I love my Title
My cover art
Illustrations are grand
But my story
Makes no sense
Is this how my story
Will always seem?
Will I ever learn
How to read your story
If unable to know my own?
Needing to look up my small
Words
To understand your bigger words
Somehow
Someday
I may
Understand
I just hope it won't be
My last words

There is a chord
In your song
That makes me cry
It touches me
So deep...
I wish
It was
For me

You made me
Put my heart away
I put it on the shelf
It kept wanting to jump back in
But you told it to stop
Hope and pray
You meant
Wait...
Not yet
But
Soon

I dreamt of a man
I did not know
Sitting next to me
In a crowd of people
Tired and needing comfort
He held me like a baby
His arm around my waist
My head on his chest
I felt so safe
Only a little while...
People started criticizing him
For holding me like this
He got up from me
Starting to walk away
As I was
Looking at him
Wondering "where are you going"?
I still did not know this man
All I could do was watch him leave
He didn't even turn around
As people jeered him
He went away...
I do not think
I will ever
Know who this man
Is

My cat won't cuddle
Lost my car, too
Forgot where I parked
I'll just watch some
Jeapardy clues
I have no snacks
And my boots are broken down,
Mary Lou
hates the word slacks, and with mixed drinks, she goes to town!
I lost my dog
I lost my truck
I lost my girl
I wonder what's on Cozy TV right now?
Pretty sure it's Monk
Sorry, I got distracted, Mary Lou
Sad you're
Feeling melancholy and blue
I mean it's my only pair of shoes
Can you fix my boots, please ?
With some whiskey
Or some twine
She said
"Try some shoestring
Even try some wine"
Walking all over town
Pondering
Mary Lou
That's actually how my boots feel
Right now...
Very blue
And it's not
Not just my shoes

If your heart breaks
Into so many pieces
Are you allowed
To pick any
Of
Them
Up?
Or do you
Leave
Them
Be?

Her......

We may not
Be able
To heal
Each others wounds
But we can
Compare
Share
And
Admire
Each
Other's
Scars

If your heart is divided
And both sides break
What is it called?
Quadruple
Heartache?

Today feels like a dream
Years ago dreamt
Of when you left me
Alone in the woods
In a dark colorless cabin
You took the warmth
You took the light
You took your family
And you left me there...
Alone.
Today
Feels like that dream

In the heart of darkness
Is
A delicate candle
Fragile
Way
Down in the corner
Waiting...
Waiting in smallness
Hoping to
Light up
The wick is burnt
To a crisp
Bring a knife...
A gentle touch
And some matches

The only cure for me
Is your voice
And
I admire the
Stunning
Bottle
It
Comes
In

The blood dried in my veins
Your soul was my life breath
But
In time
I could not feel you
Anymore
And that
Is what
I missed
Most

This rose has thorns
She let bees in
Needing to live
One sting from this
Protector
Can ****
That who pulls
The petal off a
Newborn rose
Before it blooms
Yes in sacrifice
Yet
Worthwhile
In my garden

The sun was so blind
Can't see in front
Of me
Good thing
Morndreaming
Exists
I missed my turn
And still you made it
Into my heart

I found a
Broken
Piece of a
Puzzle
And it
Fits
My
Chaos...
Perfectly
Belonging
In my
Universe

My adoring stare
Loves you
Like I'm yours
But I stay behind
With my eyes down
So you may not know
For fear you may erase
Both our smiles
With the doubt
In your mind

There's
A thick dust
On the horizon
Let's hurry before
They get here
The judges
Of our risky behaviors
Driving too fast
Because we are
Alone in a car
Tracing our veins
Like a road map
With the metal wire
I used to remove your
Prison bond
Smokin' tequila
Marinating our
Organs with some agave
In our new
Beautiful shiny home
While I shower off the dust
I feel your dark protective image
Standing so close like a
Shadow
You say let's go now
And
Do things we've never done
Because once they show
Up
We'll be gone

You know that little
Grooved space
Just above
Your cupid bow
Lip?
I read somewhere
It can be
Dangerous

I want to be wrapped up
In our own atmosphere
Our own fresh air
Where the breath
You breathe
Becomes
My lifeline ..
So make sure
It's minty fresh

Are the many
Shades of rain
Just
Umbrellas
In a crowd
Or my sadness
When
I have to say goodbye
Walking away
Leaving
Instead I wanted
An embrace
But
There's no room for
Us
So much
Crowding in our world
I wonder if I'll ever
Reach you
In all of these
Shades of rain
Maybe
Our sun will
Shine
For a short while
The shades will go down
And you will
See my happiness
When
You're coming
My way
Holding
Your hand out
To touch mine...
But that's all...
Putting my shade
Back up
For the next
Rain...
I know it's coming

Wishing for a pure love
The kind that
Wants to make me shine
When I hear your voice
Wants nothing for itself
In return
The kind that walks on white
Warm sands
The kind that comes
In a drop
Of rain
Falling on the leafs dry vein
The kind that looks like
A child giggling while
Twirling in the sun with her tresses
Entwined in flowers
Respect enough not to force affections
Or expect it as something in return
The kind that teaches
The kind that learns
Pure and innocently
That wishes everything good
For others
While it waits for
Its turn

Sometimes
I want to go back
In time
Collect everyone
I've ever known
And loved
And as a child  
Put them in a box
And keep them
Protected forever

There are people
Who can cause
Your pain
By doing
Nothing.
That nothing
Is something
For you.
There are people
Who can relieve
Your pain
By doing
Nothing.
That nothing
Is everything
For you.

Contemplating
Sitting
Sunny tinted window
Watching a little palm
Flutter in the wind
Not sure if it's the quiet
Creaking of the room
Or the lack of
Sound
I got an overwhelming
Sense of nostalgia
For peace of mind
It almost hurt
To think about...
When did I last have it?
...
It was so long ago

Changing
Your font
Makes you
Harder
To
Read

Gained a lot
From all the
Processed
Words
Put
In my mouth...
Now
Nothing
Fits

Not everything
Heals...
But
It
Tries

There are many
Layered shades of me
From light to dark
I always stop and think
Which one blends
Best
With
Yours?
And when?

I can only hope
For all of them
All the time

You can know
If a heart is tender
If you touch it
First