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thought that it
would get so much
better

but next year
showed up,

and i'm stuck
in the same place

floating down
the same river,

waiting for things
to change.

i'm stuck
with the same
thoughts,

same memories,
same feelings
and feeling

oh so lost.

i can't change
who i am,

i can't forget
the past

but i can try
to move on,

because we both
know i can't be

your favorite
song.

a final repeat
before love comes
undone

and i stop this
cassette and
finally

move on.
Morning drops like a parachute,
circumnavigating
the irrational things within her.

She drew the grim cartwheel
--crayoned images of kids in closets,
and blackens them into
illustrations of war.

She sleeps on bleak days
with young cameras,
Lucy under the tongue,
rosaries at the border
feel like pins and needles
to an adrenaline sorceress
in giallo approach,
her eye in a labyrinth,
the eye she lost in the Crusades,
filming streets below
the color of dark Roman wine.

It's a staring contest,
waiting on rooftops
in stages of collapse,
there she lives or dies
at the dividing line with the grave.
I like being alone.
That’s how I knew you were different.
For the first time ever I craved someone else’s company more than my own.
 Jan 2 Falling Up
lua
there was a moment in time
when death sat beside me on a park bench
and he had rested his hand on the gap between us

i,

too,

rested my hand there
and brushed my fingers against his

and for a chaste moment
i savoured the warmth of his skin
and intertwined my hand with his

but he stood up

and left

and maybe he knew,

it was for the better.
it was the right option
 Jan 1 Falling Up
Aseel
I don’t want to be a princess.
I prefer to be a wall
or a shoulder
that some one can lean on
I don’t want to be spoiled
I want to
fight
Get dirt on my clothes
Clean them
search more
fail more
know more
see everything
Try everything
I want to share the road
With some one
Running not carried
I want to look behind
And see MY footprints.
I want to be free
 Dec 2023 Falling Up
Gabrielle
I feel it most when he’s gone,
At first it doesn’t feel like much
But the bruise on the cheek where he kissed me
Only gets sweeter to the touch

Like salt left on skin
From a swim in the sea
The remnants of him
On my body debris

My heart is bleached
By the sun of him
When he leaves, I’m still his
Every bone, every limb
This poem is about missing someone.
 Dec 2023 Falling Up
Veronica
The desire for attention
is never fulfilled.
the more you get,
the more you need
to fill up
the gap it leaves
 Dec 2023 Falling Up
Enas
I am so sorry.

For every time I hurt you..

For every cruel word I’ve ever said to you..

For not seeing what you needed most..

For not being kind to you as much as everyone else..

For every tear you have wasted..

For every time I stepped on your heart..

For every time I didn’t believe in you..

For every time I didn’t listen to you.

I am so sorry.

For ripping you apart..

For destroying the beautiful things in you..

For always making you pay the price..

And I apologise for all the wrongdoings I caused you!

Forgive this fallible human that is you.

I am so sorry.
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