Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Esther Jan 2020
The Jar
I tried to feel.
I tried to understand this unpleasant feeling
For I was told it would be healing
I opened the jar where I hid them all
Like a busy ant colony,
I let them scatter and crawl all over my body
It felt as if I was drowning in a sea of memories
A sea of my hopes and fears
I tried to control them but it only brought tears.

I tried again
My heart overwhelmed with anxiety,
I opened the jar once more
And it attacked me like before
This time, it relentlessly ate away at my soul.

I reached for the jar
Filled with the urge to be free
From the feelings that bind me
They won’t let me be.

I tried so hard
These feelings so intense
Make me question my good sense
The jar overflowing with emotions
I could no longer control,
swallowed me like a black hole.

I knew what I had to do
I reached for the jar once again
Tightly, I closed it in pain
And they quickly flew away.
I told myself
“Maybe not today.”
Conceal don’t feel
Esther Sep 2018
She may be broken now but the thing is

Her brokenness is strength,
seen as weakness by others,
it becomes one of her greatest strengths
It will bring forth a never-ending length
of inspiration, goals, and desires

Her brokenness is healing,
As her scars, wounds and
bruises begin to fade
a new sense of self,
one she is yet to be acquainted with emerges
Here she will realize
her brokenness is not what defines her,
but simply her will.

Greater than the eye of a storm,
her strength stretches further than
the roots of a grandmother willow
whom has bared generations on generation.

Like a baby who opens its eyes for the first time
Her eyes will squint and twinkle at the light of her true worth
She embraces the light, she soaks in the light,
she allows the light engulfs her for she now know who she is.

Giving was her weakness.
Giving was her strength.
In her light, she sees her power to control what to give,
who to give and when to give.
No longer will she give to those who only take from her
to those who only drain her.
She will give to those who fill her,
she gives to those who give to her
because they know the light of her worth.

The light of her worth
Her light
Her worth
Esther Sep 2018
There’s an empty world deep in my heart
Lonely eyes trapped in darkness
The truth is hidden by scars
Esther Sep 2018
I’m stuck in a waiting room between Heaven and Hell
It’s suffocating
Yet it somehow feels free
The actions I make in this room will lead me to my final destination
Some say the wait is too short and other believe it is too long
Most people just enjoy it
This waiting room called “Life”
Esther Sep 2018
Friends With Benefits
Emotional Frustration
Sensual Addiction
Physical Attraction
Mental Confusion
Living a fantasy
Thinking reality
Messy feelings
Lust, Love
Had No idea what we would become.
Esther Oct 2016
Hey I'm not Asian I'm nigerian
Esther Mar 2016
Some days are good days.
Some days are bad days.
Pain is played in slow motion,
Happiness in Fast forward.
I think about my day every night,
Only to regret all the decisions I made.
During the day I act totally fine,
But on the inside I have break downs
And start dying, with no
Motivation to move on.
Why is it so hard?
To be 'normal' for once
Next page