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Evan E Aug 2019
You can tell by the blank stare in my eye
I don’t give a fukk And I’m not afraid to die
Tried to put the pieces together, but I don’t  think it can,
Chasing the coke snowstorms like I’m a fukking weatherman
Hate what days are like now, without any of the hype,
Making questionable choices, gambling with my life
My connect got what I need, he’s sliding late at night,
If tonight’s gonna my last, at least I burned out bright.
Evan E Sep 2018
The single thought lingers,
it won’t ever leave,
Waking up from the memory,
scared and can hardly breathe,
Curled up on the tiles,
feeling exhausted, numb, and cold,
Just wishing that for one last time,
I could have your hand to hold.

My mind is a war zone,
but I can never leave
Coming apart like a frayed cord,
starting to unweave
Thick fog clouds my feelings,
they are so hard to see
I’m locked inside my own cage,
but I’ve lost the key
And when I eventually break out,
and my happiness finally shows,
The memory comes in and steals the show, until the curtains close.
Last winter I got very sick and almost passed away. This poem talks vaguely about the event, as well as the thoughts of depression I still am battling today.
Evan E Apr 2018
Alas my time is spent, I can no longer wait,
Away I must go, believe me it's something I hate,
Our time apart this time, may only be a week,
Regardless of the time, your presence is what I seek,
Now it is time to set sail, before the final wave,
Just know my love,  that our love will never change
Evan E Nov 2017
Wake to gunshots like an alarm,
Another day in foreign lands,
Enemies who mean to do us harm,
The lives of my men in my hands.

Pinned down by bullets zipping by,
Always the first in the fray,
With help from the lord up high,
I will live to see another day.

All I can think of is the call from my wife,
While casings rain down from my gun,
She said don’t you dare waste your life,
Any day we are going to have a son.
Deticated to my closest friend. Hooah brother
Evan E Nov 2017
Smoking and drinkin’
No longer waiting for the weekend
Abusing Anything that will numb the pain,
Strange clouds rolling in and pourin’ rain
I stopped smoking ****, for about 2 years,
But that all changed, the night you disappeared.
I always see you around, even tho I know you’re gone,
Like a ghost of the Dutchman, who always has to leave at dawn.
So I spend nights like these, sitting  on the roof,
Reaching cloud 9 trying to find you, that’s the truth.
Thoughts of the bullet or the pill, both will set me free,
But I carry on because I know I got my angel watching over me.

Miss you <3
Evan E Oct 2017
Inhale clouds to put my pained mind at ease,
At the edge of the pond, surrounded by trees.
Lie down in the grass, a bed of deep green,
Admire the peace of nature, she is my queen.
Feel the warmth of the sun, as it touches your skin
Feeling happy from the high, I just giggle and grin.
So whenever I need to be alone, in need of some space
I’ll inhale again, I’ll find zen, and come back to this place
Evan E Oct 2017
big heart full of love but it barely beats,
Walking all alone down the cold and  empty streets.
so eerie and quiet, like the dead in their graves,
a small boat on the ocean getting battered by the waves.
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