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i still
do not know
the poem i've been trying to write
and maybe
that's because
i haven't been
writing one at all
or maybe it's because
the poem i've been trying to write
is not ready for paper
and maybe
i'm the paper
that's not ready for it
I can't find
why I'm here

in my cereal
or

in my book
my tv
my mutts

my scribbling
singing
saying
what  you should do

which pays
the bills
hmmph

no reason
i suspect
just to see
why we
are the same

just to see

just to see
what is in me

thee is no
different

than a lie
on a thursday
in february
eeking out


Copyright@2019 Dennis Willis
 Feb 2019 Ellis Holden
Poolza
Rains
 Feb 2019 Ellis Holden
Poolza
The rain starts to fall
Making way for the sunshine
That will come after
 Feb 2019 Ellis Holden
Lost Soul
RIP to the little girl that i let die
you left me so quickly
i never got the chance to say
goodbye
i'm sorry i didn't fight for you more
i wanted to protect you
so i lock us behind my bedroom door
but as the days went by
i looked in the mirror
and saw you die a little more inside
the sobs grew louder
your voice grew hoarse
leaving your throat as dry as powder
.....then you stopped talking at all
the world would disappear
through your tears
as you stare at the wall
one day i woke up and you were no more
i screamed your name
but you never came
you died in the middle of this mental war
i'm sorry little girl i let die
you left so quickly
i'm sorry i never said
goodbye
RIP to the little girl that lived inside me
the wheel spins
silent
inexorable
cold
re-assuring
a certainty in a haze of doubt
the wheel spins
static
metallic
perfection
reason made real
singular in its purpose
the wheel spins
olfactory emanations
oil and cordite
waft from the friction
begging for contact
I spin the wheel
peace
whirls in my palm
as I watch
wretched
indifferent
 Feb 2019 Ellis Holden
Kelsey
This morning I cried
In front of sixty people
Still, I felt alone
all of these nerves--
creating wildebeest
stampedes in my
stomach.
hope they're wrong
about the future.

the fear is
consuming.
but i don't even
know why.

life's really crazy sometimes.
written: 08/09/2018
revised: 08/31/2018
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