Here's to the guy I'll never have,
Tell me what's like to lose the one who loved you,
And choose the one who 'settled' for you.
Years down the line, when there's no fire in your life,
Would you the miss the warmth, my love brought in your life?


I never truly got to know you,
but god! I really tried to,
You were like a movie I couldn't understand,
would've given everything to know what goes inside your head.
But even with the things i didnt know,
I knew it would only make my love grow.


Sometimes I'd lay awake at night,
Wondering where you go,
When things get hard and life takes a toll,
Do you look for arms to run and hide
Or do you to drown it with whisky or wine?

What's the song that always gets you on your feet,
Or the movie that always makes you weep?
What's the memory you hold close to your heart,
Or the wish you make under a shooting star?


To be with you was never a daydream but a prayer for me,
But sometimes, just sometimes I'd allow myself to think how it would be,

And i would see us ,at midnight, wide awake
Dancing around the kitchen, wondering what to bake.
You complain how I have the worst taste in songs,
But when my favourite song played, i catch you singing along.


But let's acknowledge the sad reality, shall we?
That's it's only in my mind where exist a 'you and me'.

I know, I should have told you how i felt,
But how can I, when you have your arms wrapped around someone else?
I hate the fact that you couldn't see,
Something as bright as the sun and loud as the sea.
You should have looked a little longer in my eyes,
You should have noticed the crack of my voice in our goodbyes,
There, you would've found my love,
Overflowing and overwhelming, escaping with all its might.

Now, this half written story will get locked in a cage,
Where it'll collect dust in every page.
Because I am everything you'll ever need
But nothing you'll ever want.
You're everything I'll ever want
But nothing I can ever have.

Here's to the guy I'll never have,
It took me a while to Mean it when I say,
"I hope she makes u happy and
I hope she makes you stay".

He writes poetry
But no one knows

He writes poetry
He writes about love
And loss

He writes about smiles
And frowns

He writes about sorrow
And forgotten towns

He writes about how lost he gets
Caught up in his own mind

He writes poetry to
And about others

But no one knows

Know one knows the depth of his soul
Because they all choose to see the exterior
And that exterior screams

Preppy
And preppy
Don't have souls

Or so they thought
Until the day he was consumed
By his own poetry

I let different boys touch me
Because I wanted to know
Even for a second
What it felt like to be loved
Even if the love was cheap
And it tasted like ***
Like the punchline to a joke
I never got because it was me

I let different boys have different parts of me
Parts they didn't deserve
But I offered up willingly because I couldn't give anything else
after you broke me
I was looking for different fingers
to place different pieces and hoping  the outcome
would be a masterpiece
Maybe one of them would find a way
to cover up the handprints you left all over me

I let different boys touch me because I had to prove to myself
you wouldn't be the only one
that these scars marking my body wouldn't define
my worth to be loved
I am not entirely sure  
you aren't the only one who could ever touch me without slightly  flinching

I let different boys touch me because that is all I have been taught
To be a joke
To be silent
To be ready to give until you have nothing left
- they keep leaving me and I am to scared to offer up anything more than my body to get them to stay

The poet lives two lives.
One on the outside,
And one in their mind.

When you look in their eyes
You could see an abyss.

If you looked long enough
You could sink into it.

But most people don’t see it.

Take the time to read the words, though,
And you would know for sure.

The poet lives in two different worlds.