landed somewhere in
your barren heart’s desert—
buried in sand
2AM
Because its 2am
                                
                                                and im sitting in my bedroom alone

    thinking of ways to kill myself
                  thinking of reasons to hate myself  

                                                                  while you're sleeping



because I told you I was fine.
Thoughts- Which is better? To get help for your thoughts for the worry of another? Or let them think you're fine and let them sleep peacefully for once?
What would your 7 year old self say if
she saw you politely refusing your
favorite flavor of ice-cream
( Mint-chocolate chip goes best with
warm summer nights)
What would she think if she knew you drank
coffee black?
(You used to tell your mother that
it tasted like gasoline)
You skipped breakfast
(Your dad made pancakes every
Sunday morning)
Ran until your lungs couldn't
take oxygen fast enough
(No one is chasing you anymore)
Counting ever calorie
(You never liked math)
What would she say if she saw you hating yourself?
my life is a series of endless mountains
and my rope has abandoned me
leaving me to pull myself up the jagged edges
leaving me to rely on my own strength
leaving me to question my every step
leaving me to fear myself
leaving me
i could grow daisies in your lungs
for they are filled with the purest air
that sometimes we share
i could grow tulips from your head
for you have imagined more fields than you can fill
maybe the one we count the stars in
i could grow roses from your eyes
for they would just add to your rosy vision
rosy enough to make me seem like enough
i
(however)
could grow nothing from your heart
for those fields have been over plowed
for the waves of your chestnut hair don't reach
for i haven't a clue what flower is worthy
worthy of trying
trying to prosper where other's have failed you
i fear my love not being enough
enough to wield blooms for you
for now
i hope daisies are enough
chrysanthemums
or calla lilies
or dahlias
maybe violets
perhaps even sunflowers
Cypress grow along
my touch; venture out beyond
my forehead; seize me

Their needle points pierce
my eardrums, and silence is
all they've ever heard

From me-
All feedback is welcome and appreciated
Try to fit
your life
into your dreams
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