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Oct 2021 · 342
Kamikaze
Dawnstar Oct 2021
We are the forlorn wing
The flyers on the foam
We did not volunteer
To leave our sacred home

As takeoff day draws near
We bid our bitter byes
And swallow down our fear
With thoughts of mother's eyes

The rain won't change a thing
But still we pray it pours
As if that pattering
Upon our hangar doors

Would be a good excuse
To ground a dozen planes
We know it is no use
But still we hope it rains
Oct 2021 · 251
sleep
Dawnstar Oct 2021
what goes up
must come down
like my mood
like my friendships

some ******* lie
takes me high
then i end it

what is the point
anyway
anymore
oh, oh

i'll leave my
water
by the door

i've got to SINK
into
SINK
into
SLEEP
gotto gotto
SLEEP
gotto gotto

THINK
help me
THINK
help me
SOME
body body
ANY
body body
Oct 2021 · 269
death dragons
Dawnstar Oct 2021
metamorphoses unfolded today
at 5am the death dragons slay
without my knowing, hope and faith

drugs and chance, circumstance
wasted fellowship
the death dragons dance

i did not know, i could not know.
i wish the truth had been my worst
and hell froze oer with snow
Oct 2021 · 398
Truth
Dawnstar Oct 2021
Paper bags running down the avenue
Cars swerving to avoid them
Companies scrambling for their revenue
Crocodiles in the mists of Tiananmen

Life is not a heaven or a hell
Life is but a finite chain reaction
Dares to be a selfish organelle
Won't evoke the fearsome ire of faction
Oct 2021 · 183
Untitled
Dawnstar Oct 2021
worn out
dying of doubt
trying to distract yourself

just keep
pushing the heap
you dont need nobody else

long last
when it has passed
you will be so glad you did

just keep
falling asleep
shut your mouth and keep it hid

slow down
you got no right
to be a bumbling burdensome friend
stay down
and close your eyes
cause nothings gonna matter in the end
Oct 2021 · 183
inattention whore
Dawnstar Oct 2021
i don't want to burden anyone with my sorrows
yet i want them all to magically come to my aid
Oct 2021 · 551
single digit self esteem
Dawnstar Oct 2021
single digit self esteem
single digit self esteem
Oct 2021 · 127
502 Bad Gateway
Dawnstar Oct 2021
to stand over the moon
paramaribo muscle man
i just want to encapsulate
every flavor like a good
one bite sushi roll
to paint a word picture at once
and make the fountain now
flow with understanding

stereo guelphs
parallel mussel shore
i just want to endeavor
a kind soulfoul bristol
currant curacao courland
shiai windring lastun
the most poetic wyrm

finding myself forgotten
wishing i could sit like grogu
burning furrows of blood
shoes in a daydream
little veinthickets delicate
will we ever go together

i'm not going to last
i'm not going
i'm not to last
i'm not

tears well in my eyes
pools bleached from never draining
i make no sound when i cry
but i cry all the same

in the morning i wait for your buzz
i hear just a forlorn signal
the sound of occasional responsibility
purple's the color farthest from me

death is coming to us all
cossack or rocket
it's indecipherable
what and why we must lie
how and shall we go die
doon by wackblatterside

dark the children sing
dyer maker in the spring
wonce i go fallenform
ne'er i come back to mourn

one king one crown for the dark
pull you in
much ado about you
sweet perfection who was not
sadness and thoughts not of me
i can't remain or maintain
failure is all that i am
shall i end it now

la la la la la la
la la la la la la
la la la la la la
la la la la la la

la la la la la la
la la la la la la
la la la la la la
la la la la la la

la la la la la la
la la la la la la
la la la la la la
la la la la la la

have you left yet
have i left yet

think of the fear my father feels
and why
drum last

sing hum
back
out
lullaby

can't we be sweet
can't we cuddle
hold me
please
Jul 2021 · 182
a hill in denmark
Dawnstar Jul 2021
there is nothing but despair
in this heart of mine
only a cold breeze
from the fans of time

the beat of missing, longing
pounds on my skull like waves
an insurrection in my mind

but you, through all your troubles
still press on, with beauty
and it gives me hope

as the smile on your face
brings kindness to this place
somehow it gives me strength to cope

you're as rare
as a hill in denmark
i found you here
in my hometown
you close your eyes
and a bright star goes dark
breathe a sigh
and the tide rolls down

there is loneliness and anger
in this wailing world
people blaze like torches
but inside their hearts are cold

a dead horse, beset
by enemies unreal
the prison wardens
poisoned my last meal

but you, through every upset
still fight on, resilient
and it brings me hope

through this tragedy called life
you swing your hunting knife
and slice the fibers
of the hangman's rope

you're as rare
as a hill in denmark
and yet you're here
in my hometown
you close your eyes
and the whole sky goes dark
take a sigh
and the tide rolls down
a song
Jul 2021 · 147
for shelter
Dawnstar Jul 2021
for shelter
my time
is yours

i need
and so
i'll bite
this
tree bark

four score
will be
my years

i'l live
thirteen
and three
(three)
of them

lord save me
from
this
world

let me die
or come
back
something

i once was found
but now
am
lost

saw clear, but now
i can't
see
nothing
a song
Jul 2021 · 118
i worship you from afar
Dawnstar Jul 2021
i worship you from afar
you ravenhaired evening star
i can tell, i can tell
that you know very well
just how pretty and perfect you are

your shoes are my altar of white
your head rests in heavens so bright
i am so far beneath you
my sighs do not reach you
my being is out of your sight
Jul 2021 · 163
we rivers
Dawnstar Jul 2021
we rivers, lonely, cold and lost,
though we had said we would
resume our course, still here we drift,
becoming ice sheets: silent, stiff.
another day, another shift
to weigh the opportunity cost.
we failed to warm the wood;
our taiga turns to permafrost.
Jul 2021 · 231
mcculloch v maryland
Dawnstar Jul 2021
the federal government built a bank
maryland wanted to tax the bank
james mcculloch refused to pay
the tax that maryland sent his way
so they went to court
supreme court

"the bank can't stand!"
said maryland
it doesn't abide
by the laws of the land
but the court decided it met the laws
by the necessary and proper clause
Jul 2021 · 105
im not an arachnophobe
Dawnstar Jul 2021
but i appreciate the service of
turning spiders into bears
i thought that was really kind
Dawnstar Jul 2021
no one to answer to
there's no one to answer to but myself
no one to answer to

take my hands and knock me down
take my life away
all i am lies on the ground
ei ai ei ai ei
a song
Dawnstar Jul 2021
mondo, fermat, calridiando
mondo, fermat calridiando
viladucci vendade
Jul 2021 · 87
lately
Dawnstar Jul 2021
sometimes
i feel that
all my dreams have been rusting

sometimes
i wonder
why am i so disgusting
a song
Jul 2021 · 99
Be 't
Dawnstar Jul 2021
In sorrow, failure, tragedy or wist,
'Tis comfort that makes me a *******.
My neck hurts from the tics I do,
My eyes resent the strain I put them through,
My brain, at war, breaks down the hopeful side,
Discouraged that it ever had such pride.
I miss the one-days I found happiness,
Before my mind decided to regress,
Before the glooming days, like this;
Before the pain made me a *******.

O angels calling all around me, hail them!
No doubt they know the diverse ways I fail them.
Myself I fail, and all the world. It floods
Like Barbary in Noah's time, when bloods
From angels' ***** became extinct, and then
The land once ruled by giants fell to men.
Since men are giants now, they cannot stand
The presence of a pest upon their land,
Producing naught but tearful sorrows pall.
They fear my rise, that I might doom them all.
Dawnstar Jul 2021
I cannot in my aimless nature make
My promises to work and study good.
Before the damnèd test on Wensday take,
I set up for myself a failure rude,
Forgoing what I full soon must address,
For now, for now. I put it off with ease,
Indulging in calamitous excess
Without remorse, till, struck, I beg God 'please!'
If He that fashioned me might kindly cause
The stars in heavens bright to rearrange
So that my hectic life is put on pause,
To rest, to wake, to find resolve, to change,
Then I should own, secure in what God willed,
The spirit to endure and not be killed.
Jul 2021 · 88
the moon above maracaibo
Dawnstar Jul 2021
from the pleasant balcony, well
you can see the glistening
of the moon above
maracaibo

all the fair far corners
of the earth are witnessing
the moon above
maracaibo

and all it takes is a spoonful
to get yourself a moonful
don't dilly-dally mister
take your love to maracaibo and kiss her

walking down the avenue
putting your whole life in review
how do they do it, every day?
i wanna dance
and sing the maracaibo way
dance and sing the maracaibo way
dance and sing the maracaibo way
that's how they do it, every day

that's what happens when
you spend your whole life listening
to the moon above
maracaibo

through a record vinyl
you can feel the whispering
of the moon above
maracaibo

and all it takes is a spoonful
to get yourself a moonful
don't dilly-dally mister
take your love to maracaibo and kiss her
a song
Jul 2021 · 92
elves in armor
Dawnstar Jul 2021
elves in armor
with their magic devices
screens of power
and power entices

let loose the storm

send out a message
i heard the report
you don't need pixels
to keep you warm

let loose the storm

if i had a feeling
i'd send it to you
across the cosmos
no cell towers in view
pick up this warning
take it or leave
cast aside everything
you thought you'd need

WHEN THE STORM BREAKS:
mercury will come and go
our favorite prophets will fashion a new key
as our terrible secrets start to glow
a million children escape captivity
now the messenger birds
perch on the arms of the saints
with intuition and hope everlasting
but for those with dark hearts
in darkness they shall remain
till they can smile at an eagle in passing
a song
Dawnstar Jul 2021
to think i were at leisure
to wear plaid cylinders and
pineapple socks
my home a sanatorium
gilded with emotions
insurmountable

i languish under
their whip on my back
a weak will
my god and my psychology
murmuring tsk-tsk at me
my father wowing at
Mumbai's torrential rain

oh wey ey ey

to think it was so easy
to not be half surprised
you took me down a level
and shook me up inside

you took me down

i miss the kind of moments
that make
me
stop and think
and wonder how it was
that i'm so close to you
i feel this way because
you're insurmountable

and i languish under
your whip on my back
a weak will
my god and my psychology
murmuring tsk-tsk at me
my father wowing at
Bombay's torrential rain

oh wey ey ey
a song
Jul 2021 · 93
(don't) come and get me
Dawnstar Jul 2021
anything that i do
running without assurance
i'm riding, riding
on my own

all the faces i see
caught up in the currents
they're gliding, gliding
all alone

this train is pulling south
and i guess it's best
to let me go

don't come and get me
don't come and get me
oh no

so far away
the land is cold and hot
i can't believe
what i see

this is the culmination
of all those restless thoughts
i'm stranded here
goodbye tears

this train is going south
and i guess it's best
to let me go

don't come and get me
don't come and get me
oh no

...

i have to say
i'm having second thoughts
this place is not
so friendly

i felt so sure
the truth is i forgot
what happiness
you bring me

this train is going south
and i guessed it best
to let me go
but you said you
still love me so

come and get me oh
come and get me oh-oh
come and get me oh
come and get me oh-oh
(please!) come and get me oh
come and get me oh no
i can't go

anything that i do
running without assurance
i'm riding, riding
on my own

so come and get me
please come and get me
oh-oh
a song
Jul 2021 · 77
do hold me
Dawnstar Jul 2021
do hold me
do love me
don't say die while
thinking of me
take me in
as i am
as you have
it's all i wanted

you're my rock
i'm your ledge
i'll lift you
over the edge
but don't look back
you'll tumble down
stay on track
keep me around

take me on
your sweet way
as you have
it's all i wanted
make the difference
anyway
save my world
from being haunted

oo-oo-oo-oo

deep
is the death
i discovered
in your room
and deep
is the breath
that i take
before my doom

i know it could be so far away
but fate is up to you
i wanna believe i'm more today
i don't know what is true

so i just have faith in the things you do
i just have faith in the things you do
i just have faith
in the things
you do
a song
Jul 2021 · 78
and should the mountains
Dawnstar Jul 2021
and should the mountains, flush with royal haze
be scornèd by the choosy pauper's gaze
then i would look without critique or qualm
upon those soft-brushed lazy hills of calm
with beauty shown in shades from teal to rose
how elegant the slopes lie in repose
not wanting to shrug off their foggy cloaks
but wrap those blankets tight round pines and oaks
in safety from the world i lie alone
among the green immortal mounts of home
a wanderer above the sea of fog
a pilgrim knelt before the seat of God
Dawnstar Jul 2021
islands wide the ocean comes to close
mouthing off to nature's maid in wait
deep violet horizons overflow
strike the stars and spill the walls of fate
out in Canterbury, crests of red
cocking o'er the faithful clapping crowd
meat one tired soggy seaborne head
drolly shaking hands and laughing loud
life goes on, one stupid span of time
life persists without reason or rhyme
Dec 2020 · 101
new years' eve
Dawnstar Dec 2020
snowpiles won't move plows
as much as eyes move plows
i feel like floating over snows
in every dream i seem to be

home is a far-off place
a black silhouette
of an urban mountain

i will journey today
and cross the threshold into night
with you this sleep i'll spend
transit
no fare i offer, sorry
no fee did you demand

above the blind vanes we want to rise
not beholden to time's winds, like
incorporeal beings

and have the hopes of the world
as stars pinned on our refrigerator
each of them keeping us warm
in the voyage from
midnight to midnight

the clock will strike
the sun will fall
the world will stall
in a moment
a pale moment
surrounded by our visions
ribbons of a bright future

tomorrow
nothing will change
as we fly towards ryukyu
our last journey

but my world will exhale
as the days get longer
and sun-up again, stronger
and somehow this comforts me.
Dec 2020 · 91
when you
Dawnstar Dec 2020
when you
got a promise of gold
some things
more than others get
old
stay out in the sun
it all seems to fade a-right away

tell me
what do you see
in them
that you can't find in
me
well, life isn't fun
i just wanna fade a-right away
a song
Dec 2020 · 83
naturabsence
Dawnstar Dec 2020
what is wrong?
i ask myself
and always say:
i'm far from the mountains
that cradled my soul
i'm far from the rivers
that carried me home
i'm far from the grasses
i hugged on the plain
i'm far from the islands
i won't see again
since i've the vital strands of nature left
no wonder 'tis my heart that stands bereft
Sep 2020 · 103
acceptance
Dawnstar Sep 2020
branching out into the universe
a solitary butterfly learns that
pestering God won't turn him
back into a caterpillar.
sometimes our wills can only go so far
Aug 2020 · 127
Love Oath
Dawnstar Aug 2020
I vow to you an oath
from now until my death
to starfall and the rise
of the blood moon in the skies:
I'll love you, I'll love you
till the west wind creeping strong
comes along, comes along
to beat the mountains down!

Till the sun, far above
and the heav'ns and earth collide
making every green thing die
there I'll lie, there I'll kneel
over eons, overzealed.
Till the river changes hue
and escapes the oceans blue
I'll love you, I'll love you….
August 1
Jul 2020 · 97
aircraft into dragons
Dawnstar Jul 2020
My brain is a bowl of hot steaming stew
Never decided on what it shall do:
Boil this moment, pop in the next
Outline an opus or spew scattered wrecks
Catch on a small thought, stubborn as steel
Caring not for what its owner might feel
Ruin a party, clothesline a dream
Embrace a stranger, mend a torn seam
Lead me to valleys ahead of the wind
With constant recalling of how I have sinned
Jul 2020 · 103
cliches
Dawnstar Jul 2020
bluebird, blackbird
sailor, sun
multi-star, hegemon
chariot, gun
tree-perched wings
sea breeze cloud
laughing, crying
dying out loud
May 2020 · 91
singular hopes
Dawnstar May 2020
even if nothing arises
from the smog of a
million desperate minds'
hopes and beliefs

even if the world is
cold and without soul
and reality is
just what we see

enjoy those thoughts
those beautiful thoughts
if just for their sake
at the least
May 2020 · 90
The Corpse
Dawnstar May 2020
south of a skyward stretch of mounts
lies England, green and white land
her towers felled by ducklings

her geese have joined the wild
the frayed cacophany
of a godless post-empire

now we stare at coffee pots
and think ourselves profound
while Ur's voice grinds a whisper

despairing through weary pixels
each stitch of the telegraph cable
buried in fallen time

and down through the maps
terrifying mutations ravage earth
hurling us far from apotheosis

till the last sod of root
dangles from a broken tree
our rage grows with it, each day
exposed
May 2020 · 88
i'm a child
Dawnstar May 2020
i'm a child
of the ocean

i'm a child of the waves
where nighttime is day

i'm a child
of uncertain parents

all i hold is my head
all i hold is my head
a sequel
May 2020 · 85
pale pianist
Dawnstar May 2020
how am i still getting used
to your mourning elegance
even after so many breakfasts?
how many times have i
thought and forgot
about what matters most
and left our stomachs
growling cats
at the foot of a jungled coast?
Dawnstar May 2020
in like lions and out like lambs
you ride the burgeoning tide
and hold the world-cross
in your hands
in your hands
made of fine and polished clay
what you offer i accept
what you say i must obey

counting dreams and memories
leaping high while sitting still
in my bed i am fine
until
the buzz of a nagging bee
reminds me
there is one who loves me still

all good things come in threes
so i venture to write a third
verse, without counting
any line or any word
so as not to be drunk on ink
but solely focused on an impression
an obsession
which has been growing and now
looses itself from rulebound chains
to love you as freely as any
green field born child
May 2020 · 127
i have come
Dawnstar May 2020
i have come
to the waters

i have come to the seas
for we to be free

i have come
to lament my glory

all alone that i am
all alone that i am
Dawnstar May 2020
if the products of your despair
are relatable enough
they can make art
May 2020 · 92
kindness&betrayal
Dawnstar May 2020
warm palm
backhand tattoo
cold cheek
May 2020 · 91
pep band
Dawnstar May 2020
pep band night
hornsmen file out
the rival team to fight
Apr 2020 · 76
familiar faces
Dawnstar Apr 2020
people always pass away
seems this truth will never change
those whose faces burn in mind
sudden endings leave behind

i thought they'd always be around
i never thought their suns would down
but, worst of all, what makes me cry:
i never got to say goodbye

now i fear of growing old
living with the newer mold
swimming in a sea of hate
against the hurried current's fate
schools of fish that can't relate
to memories shared and friendships rare

take this sad reflective sigh
let it make a last goodbye
to those i loved and knew
with whom i lived and grew:
at the going down of the sun
i will remember you
Dedicated to Chris Thompson, who died too young Sunday in my hometown.
Apr 2020 · 93
effortless love
Dawnstar Apr 2020
i long to fall down in the shadow of you
to be paralyzed by your secondhand chill
my heart stolen by your unconscious banditry
Apr 2020 · 87
oaao
Dawnstar Apr 2020
the moment you were born
a quasar shed its form
and starkly breathed the essence
of purple effervescence

bringing
to the rafters of heaven
a joyous song's occasion
together
Apr 2020 · 88
again down lays he and
Dawnstar Apr 2020
and he lays down again
after raging and slamming his brain into a bed
something muted, absent observant words
objective words, perspective words
can never quite encapsulate

that raw emotion all feel always
intangible
like the jaw-taste of vaughan
the van jazz neon net
(an album his father kept)

young hearts and their dreams
exhausted muscles at their seams
scream
scream
scream
into the wake of venus
and still bleed even with the advent of therapy

and he lays down again
Apr 2020 · 92
pound
Dawnstar Apr 2020
stop giving me news
pulsate my rhythms differently
cities and urban life

i read your views
and all i hear are hatters
convinced of their own greatness

fox worm
shine on down

from.
Dawnstar Apr 2020
slick sentences afford me frisson
yet i'm not sure i like this chill

feels pretentious esoteric
not vital nor sinful nor ill

one seasoned word of calm
captains fifty voices shrill
Apr 2020 · 65
Untitled
Dawnstar Apr 2020
shoot me if i must wait
Apr 2020 · 80
chair quarantine
Dawnstar Apr 2020
my legs daily grow stiffer
as i descend deeper into
philosophy
which is a kind of madness

maybe by the end i'll have it all figured out
but this i doubt
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