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Derrick Twidwell Jul 2014
Oh this pain you left me
I can't stand to have this on my shoulders
Day in day out you stay in the back of my mind

You just stay there haunting me
All you are to me is a nightmare
But I'm fully awake
Leave me be let me move on

You never loved me at all
It's plane and clear
Your talk was so cheap
You meant not a single word to be true

I truly fell so painfully in love with you
It's plane and clear
My talk was never cheap
You meant every single thing to me

You just stay they haunting me
All you are to me is a nightmare
But I'm fully awake
Leave me be let me move on

It's so plane and simple
You are gone gone forever
I realize that but can't comprehend it
I have this chance to move on

This chance I'm given
I see her plane and clear
So tell me why you still haunt me
Go away never come back

You just stay they haunting me
All you are to me is a nightmare
But I'm fully awake
Leave me be let me move on
Jul 2014 · 328
Love
Derrick Twidwell Jul 2014
One word four letters
It means so much to me inside and out
A word I will never throw at anyone
If I whisper it in your ear take it to heart

In my life I've only said it twice
First was just thrown out and thrown away
Something I'll never do ever again
Second was pure truth in and out

She has wanted to tell me for some time
Yet I knew it was three words
Three beautiful words as beautiful as the one saying them
Yet I was so frighten to tell her first

Days fall
Nights rise
I knew this four letter word was growing
Waiting to be announced

In my life I've only said it twice
First was just thrown out and thrown away
Something I'll never do ever again
Second was pure truth in and out

Days rise
Nights fall
Today she knew it was the day
To announce these beautiful words

I love you
I saw those three words light up my phone
Just like in an instant it lit up my whole world
I love you too

In my life I've only said it twice
First was just thrown out and thrown away
Something I'll never do ever again
Second was pure truth in and out

To that day I've learned this four letter word
It's power can break the strongest person
Break them down to mere tears
Love such a tragic and passionate thing

In my life I've only said it twice
First was just thrown out and thrown away
Something I'll never do ever again
Second was pure truth in and out

To this day it is set to a one and only
After even a tragic end of hearing it
I crave to hear her whisper it to me again
I love no other as my one and only

I'm my life I've only said it twice
First was just thrown out and thrown away
Something I'll never do ever again
Second was pure truth in and out
Jul 2014 · 480
Still Falling Fast
Derrick Twidwell Jul 2014
Why please tell me why
I fell two thousand story's for you
You caught me, and dropped me
But yet I'm still falling fast

My reality is such a baffling one
One day I can be happier than ever
Another spiraling down an endless pit
I'm so done with this pain so tired

Walk away just do it
I can not move
So It seem I'm frozen in memories off the past
Never to thaw to a new future

Try again and again no luck
I've been stuck here for to long
Please break the ice that silhouettes my body
Set my mind and heart free

My reality is such a baffling one
One day I can be happier than ever
Another spiraling down an endless pit
I'm so done with this pain so tired

What was your reaction to my statement
"I can't be friends with someone I'm in love with"
Was it a chill to your spine
Was it not a single phase of heart

Can you just walk away from me
Then to just come back to my life a year later
Not to expect a vast amount of confusion
I'm sure all you want is a friendship

My reality is such a baffling one
One day I can be happier than ever
Another spiraling down an endless pit
I'm so some with this pain so tired

I can't be friends with someone I'm in love with
I'll not be apart of a one sided love
Still I cannot walk away with not a single tear in my eye
Tell me now how can I drop this all

My reality is such a baffling one
One day I can be happier than ever
Another spiraling down an endless pit
I'm so some with this pain so tired
May 2014 · 385
Sleepless Nights
Derrick Twidwell May 2014
How many sleepless nights is it gonna take
I'm so tired of going to sleep in tears
You tears me to pieces
I'm so falling, still falling for you

Each one of my tears like a bullet
Are you the one beginning the trigger
Please stop I can't take this
Someone please save my broken heart

Depression
Such a deafening work
You don't hear me anymore
You'll never know I still love you deeply

Happiness
Such a sweet little thing
I can't even taste it anymore
You'll never know I still love you deeply

Each one of my tears like a bullet
Are you the one beginning the trigger
Please stop I can't take this
Someone please save my broken heart

Through these sleepless nights
All that comes to mind is
All the sweet memories we have
I just torture myself with these

Do you have sleepless nights
Just laying there think of our sweet memories
Oh how much I doubt that
Oh how I will deny these doubt

Each one of my tears like a bullet
Are you the one beginning the trigger
Please stop I can't take this
Someone please save my broken heart
Derrick Twidwell May 2014
It's been there deep inside
Silence
Out of site out of mind
Waiting to burst

Always end up in my thoughts
I want to live with out this suffering
Your presence in my mind suffocates me
Creeps up only in the night like a wolf

Throw away all this we shared
All I can do is forget
I never want to forget you
You will always forget me

Save me I'm pleading
Somebody rescue my weak and torn heart
Mend it please stitch it back together
Want to know how it feels again

Always end up in my thoughts
I want to live with out this suffering
Your presence in my mind suffocates me
Creeps up only in the night like a wolf

These thousand memories of you and I
What do I do with them all
I don't even cross your mind at all do I
I'm left with all the heavy burdens on my shoulders

Wake me up wake me up
I'm tired of this nightmare of what I lost
I should never soak of this
But I can't escape it at all

Always end up in my thoughts
I want to live with out this suffering
Your presence in my mind suffocates me
Creeps up only in the night like a wolf

Happiness what is that even
I can't remember what it feels like
True happiness
Please come back to me

I tried so hard to keep hold
I held it to tight
You couldn't even breath
I tried way to hard to keep hold

Now it's all over and done
What am I to do now but suffer

Always end up in my thoughts
I want to live with out this suffering
Your presence in my mind suffocates me
Creeps up only in the night like a wolf
May 2014 · 483
Heaven
Derrick Twidwell May 2014
I'm falling fast oh so fast
Please catch me my dear
I just need you to catch me
Cuz I'll catch you if you fall

Day to night I well fall more and more for you
You are the closest thing to heaven
Be my heaven
I'll be your heaven

Walk with me as we hold hands
Just feeling your touch makes me feel like I'm flying
Come fly with me
This world it's so big fly it with me

Your smile can light my darkest of night
Your words mean a million to me
I just have to witness that's smile to make my day
I just hasn't to hear your voice to make me smile

Day to night I well fall more and more for you
You are the closest thing to heaven
Be my heaven
I'll be your heaven
Apr 2014 · 316
In The End
Derrick Twidwell Apr 2014
So much pain consists in my heart and soul
I've had to bare so much in such a short time
I want you to make it all disappear
You can make it all disappear

Make me worth the fight
Don't give up on this on us
Because I won't falter
I can make us worth it in the end

Waiting it's such a tragic thing
In the end will it all be worth it
I can never know till the ends comes
Don't let the end come, hold tight

These days are one in the same
I'm so tired
I just need to be by your side
I'm so set on you

Make me worth the fight
Don't give up on this on us
Because I won't falter
I can make us worth it in the end

Words so many words to put together
Just to explain my thoughts and feelings to you
You will be everything to me
I want to be everything to you in the end

Smile my dear just smile for me
All I want is that smile of yours
I see you there in such elegance
One smile causes my heart to melt

Make me worth the fight
Don't give up on this on us
Because I won't falter
I can make us worth it in the end

In the end I will wait
In the end we will be us
Apr 2014 · 1.0k
Lost Eyes Found You
Derrick Twidwell Apr 2014
I've been stuck
Stuck in this well of lost souls
With not one chance of escape
Wondering forever with these lost souls

Escape
I want to just escape this
Find me
I have to just escape this

Such a bright beautiful light I see
I wiped the dust from my lost eyes
My eyes turned like a switch
Have I been found?

Look closer
What is this beauty
I reached out so far
Felt such a soft warming touch

Escape
I want to just escape this
Find me
I have to just escape this

This is you, you are my bright beautiful light
That can bring me back
Away from this well of lost souls
I'm now no longer lost anymore

Make me feel so still
Catch my thoughts
All contain your presence
My lost eyes so fascinated with your presence

Escape
I want to just escape this
Find me
I have to just escape this

I'm finally free
I have finally escaped being lost
All I saw was you
You are all I want to see

Lost eyes found you
I have finally found you
Apr 2014 · 2.0k
Whisper, I Need You
Derrick Twidwell Apr 2014
I want to be so close to you right now
Please come close to me
Let me hold your hand tight
Don't want to let it go

That smile (oh that smile)
Will out shine a supernova
Your eyes (oh those eyes)
Show such amazing inner beauty

My heart beat races unimaginable as I see your smile
Such fast beats my breath can't keep up
My eyes so mesmerized by the inner beauty in you
Eyes of pure beauty

That smile (oh that smile)
Will out shine a supernova
Your eyes (oh those eyes)
Show such amazing inner beauty

Just one kiss my dear just one
Lead to so many more, so much more
Can you hear my heart?
It  whispers "I only need you"

Don't ever want to see a single tear fall from your gorgeous eyes
Smile each and every day as you think of us
My smile is so bright as I think of us

That smile (oh that smile)
Will out shine a supernova
Your eyes (oh those eyes)
Show such amazing inner beauty
Derrick Twidwell Apr 2014
Oh this pain you left me
I can't stand to have this on my shoulders
Day in day out you stay in the back of my mind

You just stay they haunting me
All you are to me is a nightmare
But I'm fully awake
Leave me be let me move on

You never loved me at all
It's plane and clear
Your talk was so cheap
You meant not a single word to be true

I truly fell so painfully in love with you
It's plane and clear
My talk was never cheap
You meant every single thing to me

You just stay they haunting me
All you are to me is a nightmare
But I'm fully awake
Leave me be let me move on

It's so plane and simple
You are gone gone forever
I realize that but can't comprehend it
I have this chance to move on

This chance I'm given
I see her plane and clear
So tell me why you still haunt me
Go away never come back

You just stay they haunting me
All you are to me is a nightmare
But I'm fully awake
Leave me be let me move on
Mar 2014 · 364
Live To The End
Derrick Twidwell Mar 2014
This world my world your world
its all around you and me
all you can make it be is all you choose
work with all you have to an eternal end

can you take it to the end
seize it into your hands
you will be loved again
we will be cherished again

feel this luminosity straight from our moon
count this starry sky in the dead of night
each one a whole story to tell
don't fall to deep into a slumber

counting eternally
endless stories in this fascinating full moon night
is the moment right
make this night to remember in serenity

take each others hand hold your head high in rhapsody
take this world on together as one
this is a story to tell
you are now a scintillate star

can you take it to the end
seize it into your hands
you will be loved again
we will be cherished again

life is so truncated
make every moment an everlasting aspiration
this all can end in a single instant
achieve and ascend to the end
  
can you take it to the end
seize it into your hands
you will be loved again
we will be cherished again
Mar 2014 · 408
You Don't Care, I Love You
Derrick Twidwell Mar 2014
so many things unsaid and needed to be said
I wake to thoughts of regret
sleep to a thousand tears each one a mirror image of us
will I ever escape my broken heart

see you in his arms, so much agony
walk to other way, tears fall
wake me up form this nightmare
I will never forgive myself, I'm such a tragedy

hopelessly in love, you don't care
desperately in love, you'll never care
just stuck here waiting for you
why can I not just move on

any thoughts any action
all lead to thoughts and memories of you and I
you just made me fall so hard
slipped up so bad, I'm sorry

see you in his arms, so much agony
walk to other way, tears fall
wake me up form this nightmare
I will never forgive myself, I'm such a tragedy

my life has lost so much meaning with you gone
how are you
hope you are doing great
do you even think of me and miss me

oh how I miss you with all this pain
no remorse
why don't you care
I fell so hard for you, I love you

see you in his arms, so much agony
walk to other way, tears fall
wake me up form this nightmare
I will never forgive myself, I'm such a tragedy
Mar 2014 · 798
Can't Ever Start Over Again
Derrick Twidwell Mar 2014
My words are just silence to you
They are such a loud sound In my ears
How many more days
Till it all is silent to me too

Can I do a thing to make you hear me again
Please just look at me as you once did
I look at you for just one second
All that comes is a smile then a river of tears

Start over again
Get it right (I was enough)
Start over again
Have you right here (I was always enough)

Three words you said first
That was all the sign I was so blind to
I love you (three words)
You are enough (three words)

Can't start over again
Won't be right (I was enough)
Can't start over again
Never will be here (I was always enough)

Can I do a thing to make you hear me again
Please just look at me as you once did
I look at you for just one second
All that comes is a smile then a river of tears

Start over again
Get it right (I was enough)
Start over again
Have you right here (I was always enough)
Mar 2014 · 394
Talk To Me
Derrick Twidwell Mar 2014
you were just there looking so beautiful as always
just was such a simple glance
you still just are so amazing
so quick it lasted so long

all day that glance lasted so long
stuck in my head
one thousand memories come to the surface
crazy times ive cherish with this time apart

you walked by with a simple stare
was it just a simple stare
mine was no simple stare
looked your way with memories of us

was I even worth the stare
blank
was it just that
walked away

all day that glance lasted so long
stuck in my head
one thousand memories come to the surface
crazy times ive cherish with this time apart

go back to that single moment
walk up to you heart racing
give we this time of day
talk to me

want to know how your doing
im doing so bad away from you
don't want to leave this moment
talk to me

all day that glance lasted so long
stuck in my head
one thousand memories come to the surface
crazy times ive cherish with this time apart

come closer now (talk to me)
Wake me up from this nightmare (talk to me)
I miss you half to death
do you even miss me

all day that glance lasted so long
stuck in my head
one thousand memories come to the surface
crazy times ive cherish with this time apart

my mind torments me with all this struggle
still I love you to death
why cant I just move on
can you please love me again to death

want to know how your doing
im doing so bad away from you
don't want to leave this moment
talk to me

Please just talk to me
I need just three words
words spoken only from you
talk to me
Mar 2014 · 541
I'm Pleading
Derrick Twidwell Mar 2014
wake me up with three words
this hell is so unbearable
youre voice would make it all bearable again
say them im pleading for forgiveness

you mean ever so much to me
can I just be your only one again
you are my only one to this day
ill never love anyone as I do you

can we turn the tides on us what we were
ive written to you so much
never able to hear my pleads
will my pleading ever cease

all I ever had in my mind was to make you smile
I did that so well in the past
what went so wrong
im so numb day in and day out with thoughts of you

you mean ever so much to me
can I just be your only one again
you are my only one to this day
ill never love anyone as I do you

I was always good enough
cuz you said you loved me
why was I so blind
questions just left in the air unanswered

wake me up with three words
this hell is so unbearable
youre voice would make it all bearable again
say them im pleading for forgiveness

you mean ever so much to me
can I just be your only one again
you are my only one to this day
ill never love anyone as I do you
Mar 2014 · 447
Mind Misunderstood
Derrick Twidwell Mar 2014
Walked such a long lonely path
Met so many other lonely souls
Not a single word spoken
We just looked into each other eyes
We saw the tragic loneliness we share

Not all of just loneliness, still
One in a blue moon my smile is true
So bright it shines do you notice
Let it blind you of my sorrow and regrets
How long will this stay, don't disappear

Never the rebel
Stay to myself
Never speak my mind
They will never understand me
My mind is so misunderstood

I cant speak its timing is off by a mile
Stay in the silence and my solitude
It's such a cold damp cave my mind
My friends and family my blanket and pillow
Keep me warn all of you

I'm so lost in this world of misconceptions
So misleading I don't want to show it the way
Am I the only one with these eyes
That see all the atrocities of our world  
Someone say you can see this too

Never the rebel
Stay to myself
Never speak my mind
They will never understand me
My mind is so misunderstood
Dec 2013 · 920
I Want This, You Forever
Derrick Twidwell Dec 2013
Twisting and turning through this restless night
if this is my lucid dream
why is my control so weak of it
I just want to control it to a reality

its all over now you and I isn't it
let our dreams together last forever
but can they truly last forever
I want this, you forever

you can end it all today
please don't end it all today
you still are all I desire in this hell of a home
make me your forever

to walk with you side by side hand held together
my only everlasting dream I so desire
you are my everlasting dream
can I be your everlasting dream

its all over now you and I isn't it
let our dreams together last forever
but can they truly last forever
I want this, you forever

to this day I will never forgive
to this painful day I will never forget
I cause this tragic ending
it has always been my fault everything

just to hear three words
is what will wake me from my nightmares
my tragic nightmares of you lost from me
will I find you in the lost and found I want to find you

its all over now you and I isn't it
let our dreams together last forever
but can they truly last forever
I want this, you forever

— The End —