I am sometimes offended.
Though I feel I am not supposed to be.
When it is said that may perspective.
I full of negativity.
When they say I am closed.
To social activity.
They say I am black and white.
But if I have time.
I can show what really lives in me.
An insightful, peaceful soul.
Or just a different personality.
I am 90% sure.
This is just now my reality.
Actuality.
I have a calm side.
I just need time.
I didn't think I had a problem.
In previous therapy.
And in the most recent one.
I just wanted to not follow insanity.
Trying something again and again.
And expecting a different result.
At least, I am not going to expect a better result.
I don't want to waste time.
Trying the same method.
Crying to the failure of method.
Though I don't cry anymore.
Saying I don't have more then one perspective.
Is only true in the moment.
Which is only sometimes true.
This false accusation.
Anytime my tone.
Anytime sarcastic.
Smart alack or spastic.
I wonder if it's just a rue.
To get me in trouble.
Put me in more rubble.
I am only annoying.
When I am bored.
Floored.
Or my mind is thrown overboard.
I like isolation.
The peace of disconnection.
Because I don't have to deal with.
The non-pleasant and helpful content.
In my surroundings.
It helps not burst from stress.
From the constant press.
My calm is more.
My hyper is less.
This does not mean I am not extroverted.
Social.
Or introverted.
It is my relief.
In the form most converted.
I have other options.
This one is just more enjoyable.
Electronics.
Since I was four years old.
This is better then some.
And does not make me a bum.
I am not dependent.
Obsessed.
Addicted.
Saying that.
Makes me offended.
I just have a positive relationship.
With technological companion-ship.
Gaming.
Music.
I am not feign to it.
Now, this is just to explain for the problems and complaints.
That way I can stay in my happy paints.
Although I do actually wonder.
If I am cocky, arrogant, or seemingly too self confident?
Yeah.  Hey, I am only 13.
I feel.
It is unjust.
To only provide a child.
With distrust.
When it is not their fault.
They want privacy.
Or an escape.
From society.
I feel.
It is unjust.
To limit.
Their own de-stress.
Their only bless.
Though I must confess.
Some of these.
May not be what is best.
Or match.
With the moral attest.
But if it doesn't hurt.
Then it is only fair.
To trust in them.
To be aware.
Of the difference.
Between addiction and obsession.
Versus just an affection.
No matter what activity it is.
As long as it meets moral standards.
Then it should not be called upon.
With distrust and interference and somewhat offensive comments.
About the simple biz.
Another year.
Then another 4.
I start tommorow.
I'd rather kiss the floor.
They ask if I'm excited.
Oh I just wanna soar!
What do you think?
That I have actual friends?
Well now that depends.
All I have are fake friends.
Nobody to hangout with at ends.
I am so social look at these sends!
I just try to get by.
All I want to do is say bye.
All I can do is lie.
Because I can't get out of this.
This waste of time.
Hit me in the head with chime.
I still won't be positive.
This is not how I want to live.
But I don't have control.
Control of what I go through.
It's as terrible as coal.
Why do I need to do this?
It is honestly useless.
Education is unbearable.
My peers are not standable!
I am going through torture.
I could learn so much easier alone.
I know it help my future!
If you changed this stupid tone!
That I listen to everyday.
Annoying so much that I pray.
For an online course take me away.
This is dumb.
This is wrong.
To put kids through this for so long.
This is how real life is huh?  
I get told that all the time.
But it doesn't have to be this way!
We could see a better day!
Just fix education please.
It brings me down to their knees.
And doesn't let me rise.
You wonder why it's mostly cries?
Complaing?
Lies?
Explaining?
Because this stuff can't fit true needs.
Needs to make thing easier.
More efficient.
Breasier.
More enjoyable done.
QUICKER!
That's a positive for my happy sun.
I don't need more assignments.
Just more assistance.
I want to be witness.
To this simple change.
Before I become.
A complete derange.
A bit different, if you guys agree please do something to spread or make this a cause.
Time.
Give me piece.
Just feel the falling.
Just to hear the calling.
Just to sense the stalling.
The tolling of bells.
Where we give in to sells.
Let me see.
What it is like.
To be a force.
That is not yet completed.
For no amount of time.
Can fix lost time.
Not one of my rhyme.
Not one sour lime.
So I just tell my story.
From sad, to gory.
I don't deserve glory.
Cause the things I am given now bore me.
So don't give more to me.
Unless it is true,
Not just lore or sympathy.
So come only with heart and soul.
If you could have the need to help.
Then give me sweet call.
A lovable Yelp.
I am joking.
Yet I am not.
So give me what I previously sought.
So I could have a strong distraction from my thought.
And also...a signable direction.
Towards this thing that is called affection.
Transfer time, selfish with this and every other rhyme.
What's that?
In the distance?
A life?
That's distant.
That's different.
That's dumb.
Existence.
Just finish this.
Where am I?
Why am I here?
Where all I know is to cry...
And also to fear.
Where all I see...
Is the end is near.
Over here,
Over there.
Overgrowth.
Taken unfair.
New.
A smoky rising.
To corrupt the lesser.
New.
A ideal rising.
To corrupt the blesser.
It's not a rue.
There is more than a few.
So call to the angels.
Call to the gods.
Call to whatever,
Even if it's not a facaude.
You see me staring off,
Something in the distance.
The fake ideal,
Of love and praise.
Falling out,
Through the haze.
My ideals and desires,
Floating down.
Paper scraps.
They make me frown.
So what do I see,
Just barely in the distance.
Me.
I tried to be more poetic.
One problem I have.
That is feature in everyone's minds.
Is how ideas connect.
This is how negatives spread.
Became part of...sensation memory?
Like any sort of tingle,
Pleasing thought...
Immediatley judged and corrupted by my mind.
And for any weird or displeasing thought,
Connected to the strands of my pleasing and positive thought...
Where is the escape from thought?
One solution I need...
How to make sure certain thoughts don't become permanent.
How to block of connections...
Of the thoughts I don't like sent.
Where is the technology and intelligence I was promised?
That could give me the pleasing purity I missed...
This may give a good example of what I need for my thoughts.
Yes.
This is a simple right,
A simple bless.
I cannot understand,
Why some people can't be better.
Be more open.
This makes me redder.
Frustration.
I can't have open mind.
When all my mind does is grind.
So loud it absorbs my life to fixing.
So I judge.
Because I don't have time to learn to not.
So this shall be a tied knot.
Till the rope ends.
Because the mind fraying is not a depended.
It is a for sure until end.
So I don't mean to offend.  
I mean to help.
Not to hurt.
But to lift out of the dirt.
I don't know why I exist, or humans in general.
But I have a few depressing insightful theories.
Nothing is going to overseer me.
And if there is,
It deserves not exist.
For what it has done.
I could give a long list.
But that would result in nothing,
Not even fun.
Weigh my soul by a ton.
Not by guilt.
But by phycological pain.
Don't judge.
Or else you may judge yourself.
I do.
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