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364 · Oct 2020
.Marianas Theory
Cloud Giante Oct 2020
It’s not so scary down here
Rock bottom has a queer feel
Pressures of a reality you deny
Become too obviously real
Eyes pierce the veil seeking light yet
You’re no longer the passive observer
Down here you’re forced to face yourself
Don’t look away lest you be the loser
Just writing my thoughts
333 · Oct 2020
Hikikomori
Cloud Giante Oct 2020
All day watch shows in my room
I
laugh and I cry in my room
But
I run I  hide from the truth
I
don’t know why I’m removed
Maybe
reality is doomed
Or
I’m afraid to make a move
I’m
A flower in cocoon
Just
Waiting for bloom
So
To you outside my room
Patience
I’m breaking through soon
I just write my thoughts most times
281 · Oct 2020
High Internal Walls
Cloud Giante Oct 2020
Even when I feel I trust
I don’t
Even when I feel I should
I won’t
Even if I wish I could
I can’t
She’s the same as me
I think
This distance between us can
I shrink
Or are we worlds apart inside
I’m ready
None can run and none can hide when
Worlds collide
Just writing my thoughts
213 · Oct 2020
4:14 am Westwood Village
Cloud Giante Oct 2020
Once was extro
But now I’m intro
And trying to invert it
Word is , I’m not perfect
Bordering being worthless
Born without purpose
But you make me a better person
I wrote this while lamenting how awkward I am, the one person who was helping me be less awkward stopped replying, and now I’m back to square one it seems.
184 · Oct 2020
.Wav Theory
Cloud Giante Oct 2020
Our souls akin to oceans
Our emotions akin to waves
Our hearts embrace emotions
Our brains can’t do the same
The brain controls the heart

The mind controls the brain
The sun controls the moon
The moon controls the waves
Our thoughts can shape the Earth
Our love can do the same
The Earth controls the moon

So we control the waves
.wav theory - Towiko
This song always made me feel in control of those seemingly uncontrollable things, as if my destiny was my own to write, I added to the concept I think ?
163 · Oct 2020
Thirty Eternities
Cloud Giante Oct 2020
It seems I’ve been waiting for eons
One album later kings of Leon
Infernally
When you said thirty
You meant Minutes or  eternities ?
But I’ll wait
So hurry up post mates
I’m soo hungry
77 · Sep 2020
Racing thoughts
Cloud Giante Sep 2020
Mistakes were made
Regrets of a ghost
Gone when I was needed most
Time is finite
And those lies were my life
Regrets of a man
Mistakes were made
The price paid
My time, My life, My mind
I wrote it the night before my birthday, I was feeling anxious
64 · Sep 2020
Who am I ?
Cloud Giante Sep 2020
My name is Cloud
I am shy
I am witty
I am lost
I am pessimistically optimistic
I am afraid of success
I am lonely most days
I am a failure in my own eyes
I am a brother to some
But I am a big brother to one
I am seeking forgiveness
I am seeking redemption
I am disgusted with myself most days
I am one who embraces failure because it’s all I’ve ever known
I am a gentle giant
I am one who loves to easily
I am one who trusts too easily
I am one who lacks forgiveness
I am one with patience
I am one who wishes to live honestly
I am one who refuses to harbor hatred
I am infatuated with martial arts
I am a fisherman
I am a *******
I am a hopeless romancer
I am  oblivious
I am overweight
I am not harsh with others but cruel to myself
I am passively killing myself
I am one who has broken trust
I am one who loves music
I am one who loves  film
I am one who appreciates artistic expression
I am one who is afraid to feel
I am one who wants to be the “Hero”
I am a big lipped *******
I am one who loves to make others laugh
I am one in the pursuit of happiness
I am one who places bonds above all else
I am one who should of died at birth
I am one who attempted suicide
I am one who survived
I am one who wants to know “why”
I am one with his head in the clouds
I am one who lives in my head
I am one who can never find the right words
I am the anti-hero
I am an animal lover
I am one who loves to read
I am a ******
I am awkward
I am opinionated
I am one who loves to have his opinions challenged
I am one who embraces change
I am a hypocrite and I hate it
I am an introvert
I am one who loves nature
I am one who has hope for the future
I am one  who lost hope for the present
I am one who finds it easier to live for others than for myself
I am one who wants to be better than I was yesterday
I am one who loves to travel
I am one who’s kindness is taken for weakness
I am a son and a grandson
I am a good listener
I am terrible at consoling people
I am the worlds best hug giver
I am one with no confidence
I am always misunderstood
I am impulsive
I am regretful
I am determined to never regret again
I am  trying to find my way
I am one who lived as neither human or ghost for a decade
I am not who you think I am
I am one who spent years trying to understand himself
Yet I am one who still understands nothing
Who am I ? What am I ? Am I human? Am I ghost?
Someone said they felt they didn’t know me so I wrote this but realized I could never send it

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